Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
About tellithowitis : Oh hi, I'm a nose. It gets quite lonely being a nose, but I do get to meet a lot of other noses but they are quite nosy and rude. Im a GIRL nose. A GIRL. Don't you dare call me a he\his/it because I will blow up and boogers will be all over you.
I think I'm a pretty outgoing nose. I like to jump to different people. I like to travel. But I do just like being on my host. I feed off of its face. Just kidding. Or not. Or so. Whatever you find not revolting.
It's pretty hard being a nose. I have to type everything with the point of my nose (this took me 3 hours to write.) Its not easy being cheesy.
I finally got the new fml version so feel free to message me!
I like the regular commenters and I just like to make people laugh. Who nose, maybe you learned something from my profile! Hope you have enjoyed stalking me.
You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Back from a party
An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.
Today, my boyfriend proposed to me in front of an entire street of people. We've only been dating for a week. One of the women in the crowd then called me heartless and threw a hamburger at me when I turned him down. FML
Today, I asked a coworker if she would cover for me on Easter because I want to spend it with my 3 year old daughter. She said no because she wants to spend Easter with her kids, too. She doesn't have kids. FML
Today, for an eight hour flight to Copenhagen, Denmark, I paid extra to get a seat offering more leg room. Unfortunately, the man behind me was so tall, his knees were pressing against my back the entire flight. FML
Today, a woman slipped on the ice in front of me. Instinctively, I caught her before she fell. Instead of thanking me, she whirled around and asked me if my *expletive* mother had taught me to grope women inappropriately. FML
Today, I found myself crying in the bathroom because I started to feel lonely and depressed. My mother came into the bathroom, hearing me cry and gave me an hour long speech about what a beautiful human being I am... And to not forget to lose weight. FML
Friday 17 October 2014