Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

tellithowitis

Search for a member

tellithowitis

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 3050
  • Number of comments : 354
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 32 posted

About tellithowitis : Oh hi, I'm a nose. It gets quite lonely being a nose, but I do get to meet a lot of other noses but they are quite nosy and rude. Im a GIRL nose. A GIRL. Don't you dare call me a he\his/it because I will blow up and boogers will be all over you.

I think I'm a pretty outgoing nose. I like to jump to different people. I like to travel. But I do just like being on my host. I feed off of its face. Just kidding. Or not. Or so. Whatever you find not revolting.

It's pretty hard being a nose. I have to type everything with the point of my nose (this took me 3 hours to write.) Its not easy being cheesy.

I finally got the new fml version so feel free to message me!

I like the regular commenters and I just like to make people laugh. Who nose, maybe you learned something from my profile! Hope you have enjoyed stalking me.

tellithowitis's page activity

Visits<b>lifelikedat</b> - 10 hours ago<b>Pedregon30</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 2:54pm<b>DepartmentStore</b> - the 09/26/2014 at 7:53pm<b>sethnixon4102</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 6:44pm<b>I_Am_Lamp_</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 7:49pm<b>RobotUnicorn1209</b> - the 09/18/2014 at 12:06pm<b>Tyde</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 2:32am<b>philipino</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 7:33pm<b>dying_to_know</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 4:59pm<b>countryb_cth</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 6:31am<b>mat_sib</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 1:48pm<b>drunk_in_love</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 2:51pm<b>Mardi_Gras_All_</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 12:25am<b>sarah_baby22</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 11:20pm<b>Alpha21X</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 2:45pm<b>Reva750</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 3:38pm<b>iBanana151</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 1:17pm<b>DEFAULT_</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 12:08pm

Liked!<b>philipino</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 1:32am

tellithowitis's FML badges

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

See all of tellithowitis's badges

tellithowitis's favorite FMLs

Today, I fell asleep as my family drove to church. No one bothered to say anything about the drawings my siblings drew on my face until after church ended. FML

#16628523
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29528) - you deserved it (5248)

On 06/12/2011 at 2:47pm - kids - by Brandy_Dandy78 - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was at my friend's house, and I asked if I could try on one of her dresses. It was a little snug, but I got it on. When it came time to take it off though, it wouldn't budge. My friend and her mom had to cut it off me. FML

#16627798
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16889) - you deserved it (30291)

On 06/12/2011 at 1:54pm - misc - by Apple (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had to give a reference for a former employee. I tried to say he was always willing to give us a hand on the job. Instead, I said he was always willing to give us hand-jobs. FML

#16448858
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16410) - you deserved it (27774)

On 06/01/2011 at 8:35am - intimacy - by Username - Canada

Today, I had to give a reference for a former employee. I tried to say he was always willing to give us a hand on the job. Instead, I said he was always willing to give us hand-jobs. FML

#16448858
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16410) - you deserved it (27774)

On 06/01/2011 at 8:35am - intimacy - by Username - Canada

Today, while I was sleeping, my girlfriend took my phone and set the ringtone to a bloodcurdling scream. I found this out when I received a call while driving to work and, thinking someone was being murdered in my backseat, I panicked and swerved into a parked car. FML

#16448607
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37477) - you deserved it (5196)

On 06/01/2011 at 7:53am - misc - by iscreamforicecream (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my daughter called for me to come into the bathroom. Turns out the tummy ache she'd been complaining of was actually parasites in her digestive tract. I could swear they were looking at me from the toilet. FML

#16432657
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35815) - you deserved it (4746)

On 05/31/2011 at 8:44am - health - by mrsekko - United States

Today, it was my birthday. Some 17 year olds will receive cars as presents from their parents. Mine, however, booked me a plot in the local graveyard. FML

#16342840
309 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44685) - you deserved it (4737)

On 05/25/2011 at 1:44pm - misc - by Brilliant... (woman) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)

Today, I was so lonely that I was comforted by the sound of mice running through the walls of my apartment. I left cheese and peanut butter out for them to find so that I could at least have a pet for company. FML

#16338275
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30793) - you deserved it (9005)

On 05/25/2011 at 1:28am - misc - by Anon (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I threw a surprise birthday party for my 3 year old. There was music, snacks and lots of toys. My 3 year old is a cat. FML

#16231154
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13597) - you deserved it (46087)

On 05/17/2011 at 11:04pm - animals - by kaileigh10 -

Today, I had to run a mile in gym class for fitness training. If it takes longer than 10 minutes to run the stretch, you have to re-take it. My time was 10:02. FML

#16160002
532 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35549) - you deserved it (18851)

On 05/13/2011 at 5:10pm - misc - by Alex (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, while making love to my wife, I let slip her sister's name. I don't think it would calm her down much if I told the truth: I was actually thinking of an ex girlfriend who shares the same name. FML

#16157723
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11190) - you deserved it (61213)

On 05/13/2011 at 1:08pm - intimacy - by scalmon - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I discovered my wife has a YouTube channel dedicated to 20 second videos of her wearing a fake mustache and making weird sounds. FML

#16076748
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41142) - you deserved it (6827)

On 05/07/2011 at 9:56am - love - by wtfiswrongwithher - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my mom informed me that she doesn't wash my clothes anymore. Instead, she sprays them with Febreze to "save money". FML

#16009098
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33270) - you deserved it (7400)

On 05/01/2011 at 8:01pm - misc - by dirtyclothess -

Today, while my teacher was helping me with a problem, the gum he was chewing fell from his mouth and down my shirt. FML

#15964588
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41299) - you deserved it (4292)

On 04/28/2011 at 3:42pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, a tornado watch has been instituted in my town. At this moment, I have violent diarrhea, and my toilet sits right in front of a window. FML

#15962941
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29785) - you deserved it (3786)

On 04/28/2011 at 12:51pm - health - by cnamobi - United States (North Carolina)



FML's blog

  • Gragrou's illustrated FML
  • One day, cats will rule the world, but not today, there's a bit of tin foil stuck under the couch. The Internet and cats is quite the love story, everybody knows that. A very serious study that was done…

Friday 26 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: