About tellithowitis : Oh hi, I'm a nose. It gets quite lonely being a nose, but I do get to meet a lot of other noses but they are quite nosy and rude. Im a GIRL nose. A GIRL. Don't you dare call me a he\his/it because I will blow up and boogers will be all over you.
I think I'm a pretty outgoing nose. I like to jump to different people. I like to travel. But I do just like being on my host. I feed off of its face. Just kidding. Or not. Or so. Whatever you find not revolting.
It's pretty hard being a nose. I have to type everything with the point of my nose (this took me 3 hours to write.) Its not easy being cheesy.
I finally got the new fml version so feel free to message me!
I like the regular commenters and I just like to make people laugh. Who nose, maybe you learned something from my profile! Hope you have enjoyed stalking me.
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Back from a party
An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Today, I was woken up by a noise coming from the bathroom. Upon investigation, I discovered my very drunk, giggling girlfriend attempting to urinate standing up. Carefully note the word "attempting". FML
I agree, your life sucks (16859) - you deserved it (1369)
On 06/08/2012 at 7:54pm - love - by SprinklerDodger (man) - Denmark (Syddanmark)
Today, when I was laying in my bed, I looked on the opposite side and saw a spider the size of my palm staring at me. And if that wasn't bad, I found out it hops. I still can't find it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21984) - you deserved it (1105)
On 06/08/2012 at 7:13pm - misc - by somebody - United States (Maryland)
Today, I was cuddling with my boyfriend in bed after a round of amazing sex. He decided it would be a great time to stick his finger up my nose. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16368) - you deserved it (3098)
On 06/07/2012 at 12:02am - intimacy - by C0r1nn3 (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I desperately needed to pee, but my mom was in the bathroom taking a shower, so I waited patiently until she finished. Just as I was about to go in, my half-naked dad rushed ahead, said "Going somewhere, son?" and shut the door on me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15889) - you deserved it (1597)
On 06/04/2012 at 4:37pm - kids - by obtuse_ballsack (man) - Croatia (Grad Zagreb)
Today, I got into a fight with my mom over the chores, and stormed out. When I returned later, I found the house had been egged. My mom told my dad she saw me do it, and he won't believe my side of the story. He says I'll be lucky if I see sunlight this summer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19818) - you deserved it (3293)
On 06/04/2012 at 4:34pm - misc - by cl3v3l4nd5t34m3r (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I thought I felt my baby kicking for the first time. After excitedly exclaiming this fact to the few people around me, I involuntarily let out the loudest fart. Not the baby kicking, just gas. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15899) - you deserved it (3168)
On 05/19/2012 at 7:05am - health - by GothicAngel17 - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I started the job of my dreams. Our first marketing meeting was an in-depth analysis of the phrase, "Haters gonna hate, potatoes gonna potate". I have a 5 year contract. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14882) - you deserved it (3459)
On 05/12/2012 at 10:36am - work - by picklet (woman) - Malaysia (Negeri Sembilan)
Today, I found out who my randomly assigned roommate was. Out of 10,000+ people, I just happen to get assigned a girl who threatened to kill me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18558) - you deserved it (1141)
On 05/09/2012 at 7:26pm - misc - by roomingwithevil - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I had to excuse myself from the classroom so I could have a quick wank. This was because I somehow got extremely horny during a lesson on frog reproduction. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7941) - you deserved it (24039)
On 05/09/2012 at 6:19pm - intimacy - by polimeros (man) - Mexico (Queretaro de Arteaga)
Today, I shut my finger in the car door. The door locked. Then I dropped the keys on the ground and couldn't reach them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24282) - you deserved it (1772)
On 05/06/2012 at 12:09am - health - by catherineratley - United States (Illinois)
Today, I watched "Rain Man" with my family. The whole time they kept exclaiming, "Omigod! That's just like Kate!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (12093) - you deserved it (1685)
On 04/29/2012 at 11:22am - misc - by Kate (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I realized just how bad my problem with making eye contact is, when I caught myself looking the other way when the singer in a music video looked directly at the camera. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14882) - you deserved it (3079)
On 04/24/2012 at 2:49pm - misc - by suhleedah18 - United States
Today, just three days into a much-needed vacation, my 5-year-old daughter has come down with chickenpox. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16445) - you deserved it (1853)
On 04/21/2012 at 3:26pm - kids - by Lorena - United States (Hawaii)
Today, a woman was staring at me. This went on for about five minutes until I couldn't take it anymore. I screamed at her to cut it out. It turns out she had a lazy eye. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6014) - you deserved it (19011)
On 04/15/2012 at 11:29am - misc - by Salvation711 - United States
Today, a woman was staring at me. This went on for about five minutes until I couldn't take it anymore. I screamed at her to cut it out. It turns out she had a lazy eye. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6014) - you deserved it (19011)
On 04/15/2012 at 11:29am - misc - by Salvation711 - United States
Monday 20 May 2013
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