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tacohead411

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tacohead411
  • Town/Country : Bikini Bottom, Narnia
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 7071
  • Number of comments : 25
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About tacohead411 : Squidward is done with your shit.

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tacohead411's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to lie to my female roommate about what happened last night. She was drunk and spent half the night cuddling with me and trying to get me to kiss her. I've loved this girl for two years, but I promised her I wouldn't let her cheat on her boyfriend with anyone. Even me. FML

#16677911
340 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62700) - you deserved it (10961)

On 06/15/2011 at 2:00pm - love - by anonymous (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was in my family's hotel room taking a dump. The lock to the bathroom was broken so we had made a deal: when the door is closed, someone is using the toilet. The maid didn't know that. She punched me in the face because she claimed I scared her. FML

#16675127
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30053) - you deserved it (2706)

On 06/15/2011 at 9:37am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Denmark (Sjelland)

Today, I went to a concert with my boyfriend. I was repeatedly ass-grabbed, grinded on and hit on by guys. My boyfriend's response was, "As long as they continue to bring you free beer, let them get a little feel of what they are paying for." FML

#16674026
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37246) - you deserved it (7940)

On 06/15/2011 at 6:20am - misc - by unknown - United States (California)

Today, a car hit me while I was in a crosswalk. The driver jumped out of her car and stepped over me to check her car for damage. FML

#16671124
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36737) - you deserved it (2597)

On 06/15/2011 at 1:07am - health - by Username - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend wouldn't kiss me because there was a picture of Superman on my shirt. FML

#16668659
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27152) - you deserved it (9175)

On 06/14/2011 at 10:38pm - love - by Username (woman) - United States

Today, I was unbelievably horny so I sent a kinky text message to a boy I really like, only to receive the reply, "Not tonight, I'm raging Minecraft, having a wank, and going to sleep. Try again tomorrow." FML

#16667115
301 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30654) - you deserved it (10623)

On 06/14/2011 at 9:17pm - intimacy - by Username - United Kingdom (Lancashire)

Today, I went to visit my boyfriend at work. That's where I met his pregnant girlfriend. FML

#16661874
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52879) - you deserved it (4541)

On 06/14/2011 at 2:37pm - love - by hatelife - United States (Ohio)

Today, my friend sent me an online money transfer. After forgetting the password and locking myself out of my account, I had to phone up the bank and have it reset. I was prompted to answer the security question, which was "What, what?" I had to say "In the butt." to get my money. FML

#16661334
269 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11504) - you deserved it (55299)

On 06/14/2011 at 1:57pm - money - by notinthebutt (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I woke up to a homeless man relentlessly shitting on my porch. FML

#16661318
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32425) - you deserved it (2780)

On 06/14/2011 at 1:56pm - misc - by ugh - United States (Louisiana)

Today, while driving in a funeral procession I was distracted, missed my turn and yelled "God dammit!" I'm the funeral director; the Priest was in the car with me as I led the funeral the wrong way. FML

#16659246
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12957) - you deserved it (34056)

On 06/14/2011 at 10:23am - work - by patrickalamo - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend got a job at a trendy clothing store in the mall. Trying to be supportive, I went to visit him and tried something on. I got stuck in the jeans and had to call my boyfriend, who sent the manager to pull the jeans off me. FML

#16659008
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24005) - you deserved it (11697)

On 06/14/2011 at 9:56am - misc - by mimabee - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was arrested for carrying a dangerous weapon. I was on my way home from the shop where I'd bought a new kitchen knife. FML

#16657844
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31091) - you deserved it (3066)

On 06/14/2011 at 6:47am - misc - by lalala (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I was eating Star Wars gummy candies and I bit R2-D2 in half. My girlfriend looked at it and said "Oh look, now he's R1-D1". It was super cute, but I couldn't help thinking, "That's not how the numbering system works for droids." FML

#16657656
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12515) - you deserved it (45853)

On 06/14/2011 at 6:04am - misc - by techiefIve (man) - United States (California)

Today, I had to be the one to break it to my daughter that WWE fighting was staged. She began crying. However, last month she didn't shed a single tear at her grandmother's funeral. FML

#16655787
234 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32704) - you deserved it (4801)

On 06/14/2011 at 2:08am - kids - by mk (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I let my new puppy outside for the first time. When I went to get him, I saw a man running off with him. FML

#16651474
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43598) - you deserved it (10956)

On 06/13/2011 at 9:46pm - misc - by robertsonjimmy - United States (Mississippi)



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