About tacohead411 : Squidward is done with your shit.
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An insomniac or a creature of the dark
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tacohead411's favorite FMLs
Today, my neighbor passed away, and my father and I went to give his wife our condolences. In the middle of my dad's conversation with the wife, he says "I'm sorry for your loss, I knew Jim well, he was a great guy." The wife stares at him and says, "His name was Rich." FML
by Elliott_B / 06/24/2011 at 11:54am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was working the drive-thru at McDonalds, and as I handed out a Diet coke to the customer, the man started growling and yelled "HULK SMASH!" He smashed the cup with two fists and drove off. I was drenched in soda. FML
by Sam / 06/24/2011 at 12:46am / Canada (Alberta) / Work
by Ali (New York) / 06/23/2011 at 11:01pm / United States (New York) / Health
Today, I hired a cleaner to clean my apartment so when my in-laws visited tonight, they wouldn't think I was lazy. I got home from work, the cleaner hadn't shown at all, and my in-laws had arrived early. My mother-in-law is now mopping the floors. FML
by gypsy / 06/23/2011 at 10:00pm / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous
by anonymous / 06/23/2011 at 10:19am / United States / Miscellaneous
by fmlguy382 / 06/22/2011 at 4:13am / United States / Intimacy
Today, my boyfriend bought me Kings of Leon tickets for my birthday. Since he thought I was irresponsible, he gave the tickets to his mum so I wouldn't lose them. The show is today, and we can't find the tickets. FML
by MollyMoodle7 / 06/22/2011 at 3:11am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous
Today, my mother told my little sister and me that she has breast cancer to make us feel sorry so that we would clean our rooms. She is perfectly fine. My little sister still thinks that "mommy is going to die". FML
by anonymous / 06/21/2011 at 7:51pm / Canada (Ontario) / Health
Today, I was sitting at the computer browsing various websites. In my attempt to scoot the chair forward, I hit my knee against the desk that my computer was on, and ended up breaking it. I literally broke my knee sitting on my ass. FML
by Charles / 06/21/2011 at 12:59pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Health
by blondetergent / 06/20/2011 at 4:12am / Singapore / Love
by NewTenant / 06/20/2011 at 3:37am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by Hello / 06/20/2011 at 1:21am / United States (California) / Love
Today, my back hurt really badly, so I decided to stay in bed. After a while, I sat up to shut the door. When I leaned over to reach it, I fell off my bed and face-planted the floor. After picking myself up and getting comfortable in my bed again, I realized the door was still open. FML
by no one / 06/19/2011 at 2:46pm / United States (Mississippi) / Health
by Anonymous / 06/19/2011 at 1:01am / United States (California) / Love
by Anonymous / 06/18/2011 at 9:11pm / Canada (New Brunswick) / Miscellaneous
- Today, I finally finished the short story that is my last assignment of high school! I also found a… Today, I got a tattoo with a friend. When we were done the artist took many pictures of hers then… Today, I just finished treating my cat for fleas and bombing my apartment and washing everything. I…