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tacohead411

Offline (the 09/07/2014 at 10:29pm) | Search for a member

tacohead411

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 8260
  • Number of comments : 25
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About tacohead411 : Squidward is done with your shit.

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tacohead411's favorite FMLs

Today, in science, we were studying reproduction. Our teacher was reading out the notes and claimed that 'the female's penis stiffens to enter the male's vagina.' I'm supposed to be learning stuff from this woman. FML

#16892674
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41778) - you deserved it (3754)

On 06/28/2011 at 2:39am - intimacy - by girlshavepenises (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I got asked out for the first time in my life. During a prank call. By a complete stranger. FML

#16891673
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30800) - you deserved it (3878)

On 06/28/2011 at 1:35am - misc - by veebenjoo - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I couldn't figure out what was worse: accidentally dropping my car keys into the bottom of a filthy park lake, or getting a fishhook through my toenail in an attempt to retrieve them. FML

#16888373
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34624) - you deserved it (4505)

On 06/27/2011 at 10:10pm - misc - by Courtney (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I surprised my girlfriend with roses. She surprised me by getting back together with her ex. FML

#16886494
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38945) - you deserved it (2994)

On 06/27/2011 at 7:45pm - love - by fmylovelife - United States

Today, I saw a guy with a "free hugs" poster. Since nobody else was hugging him, I decided to. He had a boner. FML

#16886368
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23049) - you deserved it (37099)

On 06/27/2011 at 7:34pm - intimacy - by nomorefreehugs - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my son is going through a rebellious phase. He's taken to wearing leather and chains, listening to death metal music all day in his room alone, and screaming at me in public places. He was fired from his part-time job for swearing at customers. My son is 29 years old. FML

#16876528
277 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42226) - you deserved it (12380)

On 06/27/2011 at 2:26am - kids - by SheenaL (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my extremely in-shape boyfriend told me he hasn't had a chance to work out lately. I jokingly poked him in the belly saying he's getting chunky and winked. He burst into tears. FML

#16871149
294 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23139) - you deserved it (35927)

On 06/26/2011 at 9:08pm - health - by kaplwv116 - United States (Illinois)

Today, I went on a third date with this guy, hoping I'd finally get some action. I got a high five. FML

#16868516
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34811) - you deserved it (9505)

On 06/26/2011 at 5:42pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, when my boyfriend said it was time to play with his baby, I figured he was talking about me. He meant his Xbox. FML

#16868176
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32923) - you deserved it (8210)

On 06/26/2011 at 5:17pm - love - by luni - United Kingdom (Devon)

Today, I was driving when a guy in a truck swerved in front of me. I didn't realize I'd sworn until I'd come to a red light and my one year old daughter yelled her own version of what I said. She now yells "Chicken in the hole!" whenever the car comes to a stop. FML

#16867812
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9844) - you deserved it (24436)

On 06/26/2011 at 4:47pm - kids - by Mommy - United States (Oregon)

Today, a friend posted the Facebook status "Ahhh... relief." Trying to be funny, I replied "Why? Did you just poop?" A few hours later, I read her previous posts and found out her dad's in the hospital having heart surgery. Now everyone thinks I'm a heartless dick. FML

#16867532
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13958) - you deserved it (46570)

On 06/26/2011 at 4:25pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my daughter spent three hours crying and having a temper tantrum over being forced to have a bath after four days without one. My daughter is 16. FML

#16862726
413 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44508) - you deserved it (9951)

On 06/26/2011 at 6:32am - kids - by Unsanitary (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, my sister told me not to come over anymore because her baby is scared of my face. FML

#16861259
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37337) - you deserved it (4061)

On 06/26/2011 at 3:02am - misc - by ugly - United States

Today, on the bus, a delusional old man had an extremely long conversation with me, referring to me as "Leslie" and talking about "our childhood together". Not wanting to hurt his feelings I played along. At his stop he got up and grinned at me, saying "I'm kidding. I never knew a Leslie in my life. Nice rack." FML

#16860650
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38883) - you deserved it (15623)

On 06/26/2011 at 2:12am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, I found out that my beloved guinea pig has impaction. For the rest of his life it will be my duty to clean out his rectum manually every month, or every week/day if it gets worse. FML

#16860122
222 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29670) - you deserved it (4862)

On 06/26/2011 at 1:39am - animals - by animallover (woman) - United States (Indiana)



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