About tacohead411 : Squidward is done with your shit.
tacohead411's FML badges
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
tacohead411's favorite FMLs
Today, my son called me from medical school, asking for a new phone. Why? Because he dropped it in the toilet. How? Trying to videotape his anus while taking a dump. I pay $80,000 a year just to hear he took a dump on his phone. FML
by WasteOMoney / 07/03/2011 at 9:50pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by beablue18 / 07/03/2011 at 8:27pm / Germany (Rheinland-Pfalz) / Miscellaneous
by drunkinriot / 07/03/2011 at 7:04pm / United States / Health
by siannacasey / 07/03/2011 at 4:53pm / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous
Today, my boss fired me for dating a co-worker. There's no policy forbidding it; he just thought it was unfair that I could get with the "hottest girl who works here" but he can't. I live in an at-will employment state. FML
by Anonymous / 07/03/2011 at 12:21pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Work
by dee / 07/03/2011 at 1:36am / United States / Kids
Today, while riding a roller coaster I got hit in the chest by a wasp going 80 miles per hour. As if that didn't hurt enough it somehow managed to survive and fell down my shirt. It crawled around and bit me a few times before the ride ended. FML
by jreed509 / 07/03/2011 at 1:25am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Animals
by anonymous / 07/03/2011 at 12:47am / Canada (Ontario) / Animals
Today, I was rushed to the emergency room. Apparently, there is only one serious side effect of getting your tonsils out when you're an adult, which is only seen in about 1% of patients: bleeding of the throat. It can be deadly. I'm part of that 1%. FML
by blahdyblahblah33 / 07/02/2011 at 8:22pm / United States (Louisiana) / Health
by thanksfyi / 07/02/2011 at 5:51pm / Norway / Love
Today, while on student exchange in Germany, I was making myself a cup of coffee. When I rummaged around in the fridge, my room-mates asked me what I was looking for. I said I wanted to put "samen" in my coffee. They laughed. Ah yes, "sahne" means "cream". "Samen" means "sperm". FML
by Hum / 07/02/2011 at 5:50pm / Switzerland (Ticino) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 07/02/2011 at 5:28pm / United States (Virginia) / Transportation
by Cowgirl_Up37 / 07/02/2011 at 4:54pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 07/02/2011 at 3:46pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, my girlfriend and I were walking around when she got lost in a crowd. And me, being a pig, playfully grabbed her butt. I realized it wasn't hers when the guy whose butt I'd grabbed by accident knocked me unconscious. FML
by camzzz / 07/02/2011 at 4:27am / United States (Washington) / Health
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, it's been 2 weeks since I ordered a printer so I could print schoolwork, that way I don't…