tacohead411

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Offline (the 09/07/2014 at 10:29pm)

tacohead411

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 11967
  • Number of comments : 25
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About tacohead411 : Squidward is done with your shit.

tacohead411's page activity

Visits<b>Kidd_Ant</b> - the 12/16/2015 at 11:25pm<b>lunar_star</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 11:59pm<b>turnabouttrial</b> - the 09/28/2013 at 3:16am<b>speechprincess</b> - the 09/28/2013 at 12:52am<b>Taytochill23</b> - the 09/27/2013 at 7:14pm<b>Memen88</b> - the 09/27/2013 at 1:18pm<b>stephenseiber1</b> - the 09/27/2013 at 12:22pm<b>brokenman5</b> - the 09/27/2013 at 12:07pm<b>katydid91</b> - the 09/27/2013 at 8:16am<b>Jamie_Bond</b> - the 07/28/2013 at 6:15pm<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 07/09/2013 at 6:50pm<b>Ihaveonefriend</b> - the 01/23/2013 at 6:31pm

tacohead411's FML badges

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of tacohead411's badges

tacohead411's favorite FMLs

Today, my wife actually had the balls to tell me that we can't have sex for the rest of her nine month pregnancy, because according to her, "I don't want twins." FML

by Anonymous / 07/06/2011 at 7:35pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, my roommate showed me that her pepper spray had expired, so I decided to test it on myself. It worked. FML

by Anonymous / 07/06/2011 at 2:45pm / United States (New York) / Health

Today, I went out drinking with my friends. Being safe as we were a little intoxicated, we took a taxi back. The cab driver was also drunk. FML

by THOMASisMYname / 07/06/2011 at 1:06pm / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation

Today, I shaved my beard off. Turns out the skin under my beard is six shades lighter than the rest of my face. I look completely ridiculous. FML

by Anonymous / 07/06/2011 at 12:59pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mother told me she wanted me to get an exorcism. Yes, she was serious. I'm Jewish. FML

by anonymous / 07/06/2011 at 11:21am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend who was planning on waiting until marriage for sex decided to have sex with me. It's been 4 hours and she hasn't stopped crying, praying and calling me the devil's temptation. FML

by devilboy / 07/06/2011 at 7:26am / Australia (New South Wales) / Intimacy

Today, I was the designated driver. It was also my birthday party. FML

by Anonymous / 07/06/2011 at 7:06am / United Kingdom (Rhondda Cynon Taff) / Miscellaneous

Today, I have a cold. Trying to clear out my stuffy nose, I tried putting mouthwash in my nose. Thinking it was an awesome idea, I put some more in. I then starting screaming in pain due to the extreme burning in my nostrils. FML

by Fmylife / 07/06/2011 at 5:17am / United States (Washington) / Health

Today, I got home to three boys riding bikes out in front of my house, smiling at me. I instantly thought they were checking me out, so I smiled sweetly at them. Turns out they were flaunting the fact that they just stole all 3 of our bikes. FML

by Emily / 07/06/2011 at 4:33am / Australia (Western Australia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my ex-boyfriend posted on my boyfriend's facebook wall. Apparently I give awful blowjobs. FML

by Anna / 07/06/2011 at 2:15am / United States (Connecticut) / Intimacy

Today, I helped an elderly lady unscrew the cooling tank's cap from her smoking car. My reward? A scalding shower of toxic, pungent antifreeze that erupted moments after removing said cap. She didn't even thank me. FML

by thoughtcrimeno1 / 07/06/2011 at 1:27am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was flipping through a magazine and saw an ad that had the line "No corn, no wheat, no soy", all of which I'm severely allergic to. I got so excited at the prospect of having a food I could eat, I fell out of my chair. I then realized it was an ad for dog food. FML

by ChelseaRae / 07/06/2011 at 1:11am / United States / Health

Today, my mom tried to sell me a bag of rice, with "Cocaine" written on the side of it in sharpie pen. In exchange for my soul. FML

by Username / 07/05/2011 at 10:54pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I called my phone company to get some answers about my phone bill. I was okay with being put on hold. In fact, I was on hold for so long, that the music stopped playing. When someone finally answered they told me to call back tomorrow. All my phones disconnected an hour later. FML

by Broguy / 07/05/2011 at 10:20pm / Canada / Money

Today, I got trapped in a glass elevator at the mall. My father walked right by the elevator, laughed and went into a store. A fireman got me out. FML

by Anonymous / 07/05/2011 at 6:37pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous