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About sxyKarri_94 : Happy and single and sxy karri! Btw, don't judge my preppy emo happy self because that's just me! BLONDES WILL RULE THE WORLD
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I dropped my urine sample on my pants. Not only do I now not have a sample, it looks like I pissed myself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19453) - you deserved it (6600)
On 03/08/2011 at 1:23pm - health - by caqi33 - United States
Today, my friend convinced me that a staple gun doesn't work on skin. I decided to put this new piece of information to the test. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5887) - you deserved it (65908)
On 03/08/2011 at 10:50am - misc - by ouch (woman) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I found a dead squirrel under my son's bed. Apparently, he has been keeping it there as a "pet" for the past week. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24880) - you deserved it (2844)
On 03/08/2011 at 6:32am - animals - by ghoul -
Today, my five year old son decided to move all my stuffed animals I have around the house, into sex positions and massive orgies. What have I been teaching my son lately? FML
I agree, your life sucks (10170) - you deserved it (31020)
On 03/07/2011 at 2:04pm - intimacy - by lolzboss - United States (Virginia)
Today, I threw up when I woke up, feeling quite ill, I told my mum. She instantly thought I was pregnant. I'm still a virgin and she doesn't believe me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25287) - you deserved it (2362)
On 03/07/2011 at 1:17pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Stoke-on-Trent)
Today, it's official, we measured. My boyfriend's manboobs are bigger than my breasts. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40718) - you deserved it (7927)
On 03/07/2011 at 1:16am - health - by tinygirl -
Today, my girlfriend went down on me for the first time. Just as I was reaching climax my brother raced into the bathroom right next to my door and began to vomit extremely loudly. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25220) - you deserved it (3694)
On 03/05/2011 at 12:05am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I realised how poor I am when I found myself fishing out a two dollar coin someone had left behind in a public toilet bowl. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21985) - you deserved it (4608)
On 03/01/2011 at 7:12am - money - by youshitme (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I was going to have sex with my Hispanic boyfriend. I wanted to turn him on, so I asked my friend how to say "fuck me" in Spanish. She claimed it was 'pollo frito'. I then had sex, constantly screaming 'pollo frito' for an hour. I later realized I was screaming "fried chicken." FML
I agree, your life sucks (41196) - you deserved it (115418)
On 04/06/2009 at 3:51pm - intimacy - by FML.. (woman) - China (Hebei)
Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (147919) - you deserved it (55398)
On 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm - kids - by offbeans (man) - United States (California)
Today, I caught my cat humping my dog while he was asleep. I'm sleeping with the door closed from now on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24000) - you deserved it (2216)
On 12/11/2008 at 10:31pm - intimacy - by Black - Lebanon (Beqaa)
Today, my boyfriend told me in a very natural way that my mother is better at sex than me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (58453) - you deserved it (2691)
On 12/05/2008 at 3:12am - intimacy - by Mak1 - Belgium (Brabant)
Today, in class, I was sitting next to the guy that I fancy. Shyly, I write our initials (L and A) into a heart on his hand to see his reaction. He said, "I love Los Angeles too!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (69705) - you deserved it (28667)
On 10/13/2008 at 4:19am - love - by mocass’1 -
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