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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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sneakjoint

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sneakjoint
  • Town/Country : Portland, USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 10 March 1991 (20 years)
  • Number of visits : 9593
  • Number of comments : 19
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About sneakjoint : griff2945@hotmail.com

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sneakjoint's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend and I were laying naked in my bed making out. All of a sudden, we hear "pop goes the weasel" outside my house. My boyfriend stops and excitedly says, "ICE CREAM MAN", flips me over, grabs his clothes, and runs out of my room. FML

#1485215 (493)

I agree, your life sucks (81561) - you deserved it (11209)

On 04/30/2009 at 8:15am - intimacy - by soooyeah (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my house got broken into. My brand new laptop was stolen, along with my flatscreen TV, digital camera, external hard drive and some clothes. Wanting to drown my sorrows in the Ben & Jerry's Phish Food ice cream in the freezer, I opened the door to find that it too had been stolen. FML

#1430731 (356)

I agree, your life sucks (126228) - you deserved it (6987)

On 04/28/2009 at 6:13pm - money - by Sad (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I went to the doctor and found out that I am infertile. When I called my boyfriend of 2 years (whom I was hoping to have a future with) to talk to him about it, all he said was "So does this mean I don't have to wear a condom anymore?" FML

#1056544 (217)

I agree, your life sucks (48585) - you deserved it (4884)

On 04/17/2009 at 2:42pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Delaware)

Today, my friend was pulled over and told to get out of the car. The officer motioned for me to get out of the car too so I reached behind me to get my shoes. He then pointed his gun at my face and frantically asked my friend if I had a gun. My friend calmly replied "No, but shoot him anyway." FML

#1054666 (164)

I agree, your life sucks (55814) - you deserved it (6070)

On 04/17/2009 at 1:02pm - misc - by Daniel_rules (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. Right as I was really getting into it, he pauses, frowns, and says, "I think I see the pee hole." FML

#1046980 (232)

I agree, your life sucks (76515) - you deserved it (5387)

On 04/17/2009 at 1:43am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I discovered that I had left my sunroof open all night during a storm and my front seats was soaked. I grabbed a towel for my seat but didn't close my sunroof because it was nice out. As I pull out of my driveway, I felt something wet hit my forehead. A bird shit on me through my sunroof. FML

#1016784 (74)

I agree, your life sucks (48814) - you deserved it (10467)

On 04/16/2009 at 10:38am - animals - by oops1234 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was woken up to my mom playing the piano awfully. I screamed down the stairs "you suck, stop playing!" Turns out it was my 5 year old cousin playing a recital. For my entire family. FML

#983061 (134)

I agree, your life sucks (11432) - you deserved it (60055)

On 04/15/2009 at 1:14am - misc - by christinabear (woman) - United States (New Jersey)