Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

sisterjameela

Search for a member

sisterjameela

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 687
  • Number of comments : 20
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About sisterjameela : I meant to behave, but there were so many other options.

sisterjameela's page activity

Visits<b>alexishbu</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 10:38am<b>Mattribute</b> - the 06/13/2014 at 9:01am<b>Adeptasaurus</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 1:28pm<b>Katiekhalifa</b> - the 03/12/2014 at 3:10pm<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/10/2014 at 5:51pm<b>JRT1393</b> - the 12/21/2013 at 1:37pm<b>sammyjo06</b> - the 12/11/2013 at 12:47am<b>Mornai</b> - the 06/14/2013 at 11:39pm<b>Calebven1</b> - the 05/23/2013 at 10:52pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 04/15/2013 at 8:58pm<b>Clioo</b> - the 04/12/2013 at 3:29pm<b>carry_on</b> - the 04/06/2013 at 5:22pm<b>chelleFML</b> - the 03/24/2013 at 4:44pm<b>thebestintheworl</b> - the 03/23/2013 at 2:24am<b>hawright</b> - the 02/17/2013 at 6:17am<b>slimjim8094</b> - the 02/13/2013 at 5:56am<b>dmblonde</b> - the 02/13/2013 at 5:29am<b>Covenant74</b> - the 02/10/2013 at 2:32pm

sisterjameela's FML badges

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

See all of sisterjameela's badges

sisterjameela's favorite FMLs

Today, on the bus, a little boy gave me the dirtiest look, pointed at my pregnant stomach, and menacingly said, "I know what you did." FML

#21205823
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50697) - you deserved it (6636)

On 07/11/2014 at 7:03am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my coworker called in to say that he couldn't make it to work today because he was in a coma and asked if I could cover his shift. This isn't the first time he's tried to use this excuse. FML

#21203542
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42464) - you deserved it (3383)

On 07/09/2014 at 12:24am - work - by HowAreYouAlive - United States (Virginia)

Today, I got my very first yeast infection. Thinking she would help me, I went to my mom. Instead she began yelling about how I'm lying and it's an STD and I don't believe in the power of Jesus. FML

#20503942
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31648) - you deserved it (2626)

On 02/12/2013 at 6:01pm - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was super hungry and went to a Thai restaurant. The waitress left two small bowls of fried rice on the counter, and I thought they were for me. I ate one and a lady came over screaming. Apparently the small cups of rice was part of a religious ceremony. FML

#20503300
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26137) - you deserved it (16769)

On 02/12/2013 at 3:04am - misc - by Thai rice mistake - United States (California)

Today, I held a door open for a sweet old lady with a walker. After she went through the door, she turned and said, "That's not how you're gonna get into my pants, son." FML

#20466086
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35496) - you deserved it (3704)

On 01/18/2013 at 10:25am - misc - by Keastwood013 - United States

Today, an intoxicated gentleman stumbled into my shop requesting alcohol, which I do not sell. When I informed him of this, he expressed his disappointment by urinating on the floor. FML

#20445898
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23237) - you deserved it (1894)

On 01/07/2013 at 6:11am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was waitressing for a huge family. Their bill was $750. Excited about the tip, I was shocked to see only $0.50. As they were leaving, I threw the two whole quarters at their heads. Guess who also got fired today. FML

#20150831
472 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17977) - you deserved it (42186)

On 11/06/2012 at 5:37pm - work - by Misunderstood Waitress (woman) - United States

Today, my son got expelled after using the photocopier to photocopy his penis. He then used the copies to replace every directional arrow posted throughout the school. FML

#20128322
279 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29777) - you deserved it (4522)

On 10/22/2012 at 2:56pm - kids - by thebeachisthatway (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my college class was talking about Felix Baumgartner, who jumped from the edge of space down to earth. A boy suddenly put his head up and said in a serious tone, "I thought he jumped from the moon?" Several girls concurred. This is my generation. FML

#20121409
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25276) - you deserved it (1984)

On 10/17/2012 at 7:15pm - kids - by Mouse (woman) -

Today, I fell down the stairs. Lying on my back in extreme pain, I called my mom for help. When she came over, she said I looked like a dead bug, took a picture and posted it on Facebook. FML

#20118333
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22144) - you deserved it (2003)

On 10/15/2012 at 5:38pm - health - by Bug (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my husband let me know he felt I was ignoring him by jabbing me in the right ear with his erect penis while I was Skyping with my mum overseas. FML

#20110803
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33920) - you deserved it (5522)

On 10/10/2012 at 5:48pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, my wedding ring went missing. Later, my 3-year-old came to me crying, he'd got it stuck on his penis. When I tried to get it off, he peed on me. FML

#20108644
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33314) - you deserved it (3459)

On 10/09/2012 at 1:53am - kids - by anonymous - United States

Today, while working at the daycare, I had to clean the entire place. During the next four hours, I scooped up three human teeth, a rotten log of shit, a tire iron, a condom wrapper, and a yogurt that expired in 2003. I only cleaned the place a week ago. FML

#20106106
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23240) - you deserved it (1721)

On 10/07/2012 at 5:41pm - kids - by Skidmark Sally - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to my cat meowing, with her dilated vagina in my face, giving birth to her first litter of kittens. FML

#20099894
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35686) - you deserved it (4847)

On 10/03/2012 at 12:29pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. It would have been a lot sexier had our chihuahua not decided to rim his ass as he thrust into me, causing him to break out into a case of the giggles. FML

#20069788
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23541) - you deserved it (4721)

On 09/13/2012 at 1:30am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: