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my daughter wouldn't stop yapping on about not being able to register on the new Harry Potter website. The amount ofhiny jibber-jabber emanating from her cake-hole made me want to boot her from our family tree, and I had to resort to booze to wash the pain away. I'm a terrible parent. mega FML
TODAY, I WAS FEELING A LITTLE NAUGHTY, SO I PUTTED ON A SEXY OUTFIT, LAID DOWN ON THE HOOD OF BOYFRIEND'S CAR, AN WAITED FOR HIM TO FINE ME. WHEN HE CUMMED INTO THE GARAGE AN SAW ME, HE FREAKED OUT AN BITCHED AT ME, CUZ I ( COULD HAVE DENTED THE CHASSIS ). FML
Today, my little brother came into my room and hit me over the head with his baseball bat. He then dropped the bat onto my floor and ran crying into my mother's room proclaiming I stole his bat and beat him with it for fun. FML
Today, mah younger brother and I got into a fight over who the favorite child is. My mom overhered, cummed in the living room and said, "It's yur little brother, now shut up." She was serious. mega FML
Friday 27 March 2015