About shugacube : Most of these fmls I would like to hear the other side to the story or more of it. Especially the outcome. Also show me a picture of the person who's writing the post. That would make this awesome!
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shugacube's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 04/03/2009 at 10:07pm / United States (Illinois) / Kids
by rebekah / 04/03/2009 at 3:39pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Love
Today, I left the iron and ironing board in my room. While I was at school, my mom decided to do some ironing, and did it in my room for convenience. The iron needed water, so she took a water bottle from my dresser and poured it in. It was my secret vodka stash, and the iron caught on fire. FML
by healey16 / 04/03/2009 at 2:13pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
Today, I came home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on my bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read "Because you can't find a real girl, I made your current one prettier, Love Mom." FML
by Anonymous / 04/02/2009 at 1:13am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy
by Jenny / 03/30/2009 at 8:06pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy
Today, I was at my bosses house for a company BBQ. Earlier I had taken muscle relaxants to calm my lower back pain. After a few drinks it was clear the alcohol and medication did not mix. I woke up few hours later to find out I had stripped naked and jumped into the 4 foot cake before passing out. FML
by Donzai / 03/30/2009 at 6:17pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Work
by Anonymous / 03/29/2009 at 3:08pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was getting sick of listening to the guy in the next room over getting nasty with some girl, so I called my girlfriend to see if she wanted to go get some food. Then I heard her phone ring. Through the wall. FML
by Anonymous / 03/28/2009 at 4:18pm / United States (New York) / Love
Today, for my girlfriend's birthday, I got her an external hard drive and my grandmother's engagement ring. When she opened both boxes, I took her hand and looked deep in her eyes and told her to pick whichever she wanted. She took the external hard drive, even though she already has one. FML
by Anon. / 03/28/2009 at 4:07am / United States (Connecticut) / Love
Today, me and my friend decided to spy on my crush. He lives across the street, so we climbed on the roof of my house and watched him with binoculars. He was working out, and after 5 minutes he started writing something. He put a piece of paper against the window and it said, 'Stop watching me.' FML
by Creep / 03/27/2009 at 8:24pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Love
Today, I was outside searching for "treasures" with my son using small plastic shovels. All of a sudden he starts screaming. He dug up the bones of our old dog. I told him that we had sent him away to live on a farm, I even helped my son write letters to the farm owners. FML
by Anonymous / 03/27/2009 at 9:05am / Austria (Vorarlberg) / Kids
Today, my parents came to visit me at the ranch I work at. They're scared to death of horses, but I was explaining how they are almost completely harmless. I was showing them how to work around the horse without getting kicked. As they relaxed, the horse kicked me. I now have a broken leg. FML
by Owned / 03/25/2009 at 7:43pm / United States (California) / Health
Today, my friend and I were filming football practice and talking about what guys on the team were attractive and who we would want to get it on with. We didn't realize that the camera was recording everything that we said. The tape was played to the entire team the next day. With sound. FML
by Lady_Luck / 03/25/2009 at 3:31pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was sitting at home when I remembered that I desperately needed gas for my car. On my way there, I prayed that my car would make it the whole way, and was thankful when I pulled up to the pump, because I knew my car wouldn't go any further. Then I realized I left my wallet at my house. FML
by casey / 03/24/2009 at 8:11pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous
by happybirthday / 03/24/2009 at 5:15pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, my neighbor's 4-year-old daughter came up to me and asked if she could have my dog. When I… 2Today, after working for Uber for a few weeks I realized that my driver rating was dropping. After… 3Today, I received a phone call, angry at me for not calling my dad on Father's Day. When I told her…
- Today, I was working my job as a cashier and a big, sweaty, bald man came through my till. When the… Today, I was called by my one night stand. She informed me she was pregnant with my child, i asked… Today, a customer threw a cup of cole slaw at my face at the restaurant I work at for "not serving…
- Today, my boyfriend wanted to show me that he listened to me yesterday: I said that I loved unusual… Today, I sprayed pepper spray on a guy who appeared to be following me. He was really cute, and was… Today, my phone provider informed me that I had 12 messages waiting for me on my voicemail. Happy…