About sanchezjesus368 : Hello. I see that you were curious to learn more about me how cute. Well if you really want to get to know me add me on Xbox-MonsterHunter32.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Today, I went to use the public restroom. As I saw the toilet paper was out, I could see there was some hanging down from the other stall. As I went to grab it, I felt a hand grab mine and a voice ask seductively, "what were you reaching for?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (20998) - you deserved it (7118)
On 11/22/2010 at 7:18pm - misc - by reesemaster (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I realized I've been playing too much Call of Duty. I started screaming, "Spawn, b*tch! Spawn!" at my microwavable pizza while it was in the microwave. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9843) - you deserved it (44501)
On 11/13/2010 at 12:55pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I realized I've been playing too much Call of Duty. I started screaming, "Spawn, b*tch! Spawn!" at my microwavable pizza while it was in the microwave. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9843) - you deserved it (44501)
On 11/13/2010 at 12:55pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I realized that the only boy who ever called me pretty was my 5-year-old brother. My sister then scolded him for lying. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23640) - you deserved it (2311)
On 11/13/2010 at 9:25am - kids - by blueheron93 (woman) - Germany (Hessen)
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. It was the first time in four months since our baby was born, that I could really enjoy it. After we finished up we walked into the livingroom, where my white faced brother was sitting. He said we left the baby monitor on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9898) - you deserved it (27575)
On 11/02/2010 at 12:26pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. It was the first time in four months since our baby was born, that I could really enjoy it. After we finished up we walked into the livingroom, where my white faced brother was sitting. He said we left the baby monitor on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9898) - you deserved it (27575)
On 11/02/2010 at 12:26pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I was running a marathon for my school. Two hot girls started talking to me, so I glanced at them and smiled. I turned back, just in time to knee a little boy in the face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16417) - you deserved it (5442)
On 10/31/2010 at 11:34am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, at an Aunt's wake, my five year old son walked up to the coffin, and, with the whole family around him, exclaimed, "Well that's good, I was wondering where she's been." FML
I agree, your life sucks (21210) - you deserved it (2240)
On 10/29/2010 at 4:31am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, it was my first day as a mailman. One of the houses got a bunch of cards, and the owner coincidentally opened the door as I arrived. So I said to the owner that someone in the house must really be popular. He replied, "She died this Tuesday." FML
I agree, your life sucks (23222) - you deserved it (4498)
On 10/25/2010 at 7:03am - misc - by Username - Sent from mobile version
Today, talking to my boyfriend about each others families, we noticed we both had an aunt with the same name. After a while of trying to figure things out, we decide to call her. Turns out that we are long distance cousins. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43838) - you deserved it (3013)
On 10/23/2010 at 2:07am - love - by Oriianna Raiinbow (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was going to my first job interview since I was laid off. About 10 yards from the door, I felt a sharp pain in my side and something in my pocket. It turned out to be a knife in my side, and a mugger robbing me because I looked rich. I haven't had any money in months, and missed the interview. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38765) - you deserved it (2083)
On 10/22/2010 at 12:00am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I discovered that my son has an allergy to cats. My partner of two years, not wanting to fight, suggested a compromise: that my son and the cat take turns sleeping outside. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23020) - you deserved it (4704)
On 10/20/2010 at 3:11am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - New Zealand (Wellington)
Today, I asked my boyfriend in a sexy way "What should we do now, honey?" He answered, "Suck my dick?" I said "I was thinking of something more... romantic." He replied "Suck my dick in the moonlight?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (28871) - you deserved it (16267)
On 10/13/2010 at 9:20am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Spain (Asturias)
Today, my parents gave me my birthday present. Two weeks ago, I ordered an xbox online. Three days ago, it came to my house, and my parents thought they could save money by putting wrapping paper on it, and giving it to me for my birthday. That's all they got me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24103) - you deserved it (2293)
On 10/06/2010 at 8:48pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I was working on my family genealogy. I found out that my best friend's great-grandfather murdered my great-grandfather. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31413) - you deserved it (3043)
On 10/06/2010 at 12:32am - misc - by cantstoplaughing (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Monday 20 May 2013
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