sanchezjesus368

Search for a member

sanchezjesus368

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 14 May 1985 (31 years old)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 4098
  • Number of comments : 10
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About sanchezjesus368 : Hello. I see that you were curious to learn more about me how cute. Well if you really want to get to know me add me on Xbox-MonsterHunter32.

sanchezjesus368's page activity

Visits<b>taylor21398</b> - the 11/29/2013 at 6:49am<b>daveyyyyh</b> - the 11/04/2013 at 4:25pm<b>whos_ur_daddy1</b> - the 11/04/2013 at 4:01pm<b>Booda_Shun</b> - the 10/13/2013 at 12:39pm<b>olpally</b> - the 09/07/2013 at 11:53pm<b>fuzzylumpkins19</b> - the 08/09/2013 at 9:17am<b>semper_amo</b> - the 06/04/2013 at 11:13am<b>Zazoo1995</b> - the 05/07/2013 at 11:53pm<b>mvc3ftw</b> - the 05/01/2013 at 5:40pm<b>xxoriginalnamexx</b> - the 04/10/2013 at 10:40pm<b>dead_insects</b> - the 04/10/2013 at 7:35pm<b>MythicalPanda</b> - the 04/10/2013 at 1:25pm<b>XxKingQuacksxX</b> - the 03/19/2013 at 6:59pm<b>psychplease</b> - the 03/18/2013 at 5:37pm<b>oj101</b> - the 01/27/2013 at 2:01am

sanchezjesus368's FML badges

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of sanchezjesus368's badges

sanchezjesus368's favorite FMLs

Today, I watched my neighbor bring his dogs into my yard to let them empty their piss-pipes and poop-chutes. He does this twice a day. I put a "cut it out" sign up. His dogs peed on the sign and knocked it down. My lawn is a landmine of dog logs and I don't know what to do, besides installing actual landmines. FML

by wags34 / 08/22/2011 at 10:57am / United States (Arkansas) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, while at my boxing gym, an old man came inside and did the oddest drunk dance in order to serenade me. I'm a fighter and fine with taking punches to the face, but froze in terror at the sight of this. FML

by No Action Fighter / 08/22/2011 at 3:44am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I married the man of my dreams. At the after-party, my psycho grandma stood up, called for quiet, and engaged in a long rant about how this was "the beginning of the end" and advising everyone that the secret to a successful marriage is "cheating, plain and simple". FML

by Anonymous / 08/21/2011 at 4:18pm / United States (Kentucky) / Love

Today, I finally realized the reason my son's grades have been dropping so much. Every time I drop him off at his tutor's house, they play Call of Duty until I pick him up. FML

by callofdutyhater / 08/21/2011 at 1:48am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, while riding in the car with my mother, we got into an argument, at which point she pulled the vehicle over, took the key out of the ignition and used it to turn off the passenger airbag. She then continued driving in silence. FML

by W1D0 / 08/20/2011 at 2:23am / United States (Illinois) / Transportation

Today, two Jehovah's Witnesses rang my doorbell for the 10th time. This time they asked me whether I knew Faith's greatest enemy. I replied, "Basic reasoning?" A copy of The Watchtower can really hurt when it hits you in the eye. FML

by Goaway / 08/14/2011 at 7:20am / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, I started to fall in love with my wife again. We are in the middle of a divorce. FML

by badass / 08/13/2011 at 3:25am / United States / Love

Today, my dad told me that after my two older siblings were born, he got a vasectomy. However, something went wrong, and the vasectomy had failed, resulting in me. FML

by LuckySperm / 08/12/2011 at 9:14am / United Kingdom (Bedfordshire) / Kids

Today, I was using a public urinal when a man came up to use the one next to me. As he approached, he said, "Friendly spy plane inbound" and pretended to look at my knob. FML

by Anonymous / 08/12/2011 at 6:40am / Australia (New South Wales) / Transportation

Today, since I'm too ashamed to go buy a proper sex toy, I used an old Star Wars toy sword instead. FML

by Anonymous / 08/11/2011 at 1:53am / Mexico (Distrito Federal) / Intimacy

Today, I took my new boyfriend to a family dinner. Despite having made everyone agree to be on their best behavior, my grandma spewed obscenities such as "fuck me sideways, aren't you a catch?" and "you just can't pull ass like that at my age" throughout. FML

by moonstone15 / 08/05/2011 at 8:24pm / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy

Today, while stuck in traffic on the highway, my 5 year old in the back seat asked me why the man in the car next to us was pulling on the other man's "peepee". FML

by whatnot / 08/04/2011 at 12:04am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, my son drew in Sharpie all over the wall, so I spanked him as punishment. When my boss came over for dinner, my son shouted, "Daddy made me take my punishment in the butt." FML

by ohcrap / 08/02/2011 at 12:58am / United States (Colorado) / Kids

Today, I found out my boyfriend can name each and every Pokémon, but can't remember my birthday. FML

by Ignored / 07/13/2011 at 2:47am / United States (Texas) / Geek

Today, my drunk father chased me down the street with my little brother's light saber screaming, "Come back Yoda! Teach me how to use the force!" FML

by Yoda / 07/08/2011 at 1:23am / United States (New York) / Geek