About sanchezjesus368 : Hello. I see that you were curious to learn more about me how cute. Well if you really want to get to know me add me on Xbox-MonsterHunter32.
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sanchezjesus368's favorite FMLs
Today, I watched my neighbor bring his dogs into my yard to let them empty their piss-pipes and poop-chutes. He does this twice a day. I put a "cut it out" sign up. His dogs peed on the sign and knocked it down. My lawn is a landmine of dog logs and I don't know what to do, besides installing actual landmines. FML
by wags34 / 08/22/2011 at 10:57am / United States (Arkansas) / Animals
Today, while at my boxing gym, an old man came inside and did the oddest drunk dance in order to serenade me. I'm a fighter and fine with taking punches to the face, but froze in terror at the sight of this. FML
by No Action Fighter / 08/22/2011 at 3:44am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I married the man of my dreams. At the after-party, my psycho grandma stood up, called for quiet, and engaged in a long rant about how this was "the beginning of the end" and advising everyone that the secret to a successful marriage is "cheating, plain and simple". FML
by Anonymous / 08/21/2011 at 4:18pm / United States (Kentucky) / Love
by callofdutyhater / 08/21/2011 at 1:48am / United States (California) / Kids
Today, while riding in the car with my mother, we got into an argument, at which point she pulled the vehicle over, took the key out of the ignition and used it to turn off the passenger airbag. She then continued driving in silence. FML
by W1D0 / 08/20/2011 at 2:23am / United States (Illinois) / Transportation
Today, two Jehovah's Witnesses rang my doorbell for the 10th time. This time they asked me whether I knew Faith's greatest enemy. I replied, "Basic reasoning?" A copy of The Watchtower can really hurt when it hits you in the eye. FML
by Goaway / 08/14/2011 at 7:20am / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous
by badass / 08/13/2011 at 3:25am / United States / Love
by LuckySperm / 08/12/2011 at 9:14am / United Kingdom (Bedfordshire) / Kids
by Anonymous / 08/12/2011 at 6:40am / Australia (New South Wales) / Transportation
by Anonymous / 08/11/2011 at 1:53am / Mexico (Distrito Federal) / Intimacy
Today, I took my new boyfriend to a family dinner. Despite having made everyone agree to be on their best behavior, my grandma spewed obscenities such as "fuck me sideways, aren't you a catch?" and "you just can't pull ass like that at my age" throughout. FML
by moonstone15 / 08/05/2011 at 8:24pm / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy
by whatnot / 08/04/2011 at 12:04am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy
by ohcrap / 08/02/2011 at 12:58am / United States (Colorado) / Kids
by Ignored / 07/13/2011 at 2:47am / United States (Texas) / Geek
by Yoda / 07/08/2011 at 1:23am / United States (New York) / Geek
- Today, my fiance and I were having pretty rough sex when she screamed for me to stop. After rushing… Today I had to pick up my son from soccer practice. I saw my son from my car, so I said "Get in the… Today, the baby I nanny peed all through my clothes. I can't take a shower or change my clothes for…