Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
About sanchezjesus368 : Hello. I see that you were curious to learn more about me how cute. Well if you really want to get to know me add me on Xbox-MonsterHunter32.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
I was bitchd out by mah 17 year old son's teacher!! It seems the idiot teacher made the kids advocate 4 his own political beliefs in a presentation, and mah son endd his speech saying, "And it remains mah opinion that our instructor is cramping mah motherfucking style." Instant suspension!! FML
looool Today, I wore mah brand new Wonderbra to school. When I got home, mah dad looked at me and started laughing hysterically. Between breaths, he asked if anyone actually thought mah chest was that big and said "You know why it's called a Wonderbra? Guys take it off and wonder where yur tits went." FML
Today... I Was Talking Wit My Uncle... Wen Te Subject Of My Abusive Moter-in-law Cummed Up. He Assured Me E'd Talk To Er An Straigten Tings Out. Apparently Tis Means Posting On Er Facebook Wall Treatening To "pimp-slap A Bitc" If Se Doesn't Get Er "fat Ass Out Of Family Business". FML
Yesterday , the shy girl in mah class decided to bring a cake to share with everyone , since it was her birthday. Excited about the cake , I got everybody to sing "happy birthday" 4 her , only to realize too late that nobody in the class know her name , myself included. FML
Today , mah five year old ran down the street wereing nothing but flip flops , Star Wars underwear , an a baseball helmet. He was swinging a badminton rackethile screaming "THIS IS SPARTA!" My neighbors watched laughing as I had to run after him down the street in mah pajamas. FML
Today , I had leg surgery. While I was recovering in the hospital , my boyfriend dumped me. I then had to ride home , a 2 hour drive , listening to my mother and aunt tell me he was the best thing to happen to me and I will never fine a better man. Then the morphine wore off. big fat FML
Today, at 7am, I was woken up by a telemarketer. He tried to sell me a bedroom set containing ( a comfortable pillow and goose feather cover ). I was working the graveyard shift and had only just gotten to sleep an hour earlier. mega FML
Yesterday, I realized that the place that mah brother and I would find soggy balloon and blow them up when we were younger is where the prostitute take their clients. We were blowing up used condom fir a good part of our childhood. FML
Friday 27 March 2015