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sanchezjesus368

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sanchezjesus368
  • Town/Country : Nashville, U.S.A
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 14 May 1985 (28 years)
  • Number of visits : 1917
  • Number of comments : 10
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About sanchezjesus368 : Hello. I see that you were curious to learn more about me how cute. Well if you really want to get to know me add me on Xbox-MonsterHunter32.

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sanchezjesus368's favorite FMLs

Today, my wife of 2 years told me she was pregnant, after we've been trying for ages. Excited, about to call my parents, my wife then told me, "Don't get your hopes up it might not be yours, the father could be 5 other guys." And then asked me what I'd like for dinner. FML

#12277666
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51155) - you deserved it (3842)

On 08/03/2010 at 12:07am - intimacy - by Cheated (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I woke up to a pain on my eyelid. I stumbled into the bathroom to find a huge tick attached to the edge of my eyelid. My dad used tweezers to pull it off, only the head stuck. I had to go to the doctor and sit there for 15 minutes so she could pull the rest out. FML

#11821332
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35123) - you deserved it (2614)

On 07/12/2010 at 12:31am - health - by Sarah220 - United States (Virginia)

Today, I went out with my boyfriend and thought I'd wear two bras under my singlet-top to make my chest look bigger. Upon leaving Target, one of the security guards noticed the extra straps and accused me of shoplifting. I had to spend the next 20 minutes explaining the situation to security. FML

#11629383
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15757) - you deserved it (39207)

On 07/03/2010 at 3:14am - misc - by embarrassed (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I found out my 19 year old daughter is pregnant. The father is a toss up between my 45 year-old best friend, and the 30 year old guy who cleans our pool. FML

#11225858
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50545) - you deserved it (5536)

On 06/15/2010 at 9:27pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found out that my best friend kisses me while I sleep. We're both guys. FML

#10975690
311 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60940) - you deserved it (7587)

On 06/04/2010 at 10:03pm - love - by weirdesout - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting it on when her cat attacked me. I was pissed, so I grabbed the cat and rushed outside to get rid of it. Little did I know, her parents were home, sitting outside. So I was naked, with a feral cat in front of my junk trying to kill me. All I could say was "Nice Weather?" FML

#10761245
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17269) - you deserved it (31115)

On 05/25/2010 at 7:33pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I swerved to avoid running over a dead cat in the road. Instead, I ran over its head. The crack of its skull was loud enough for me to hear it. FML

#10668547
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35243) - you deserved it (7458)

On 05/21/2010 at 1:26pm - animals - by anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was with my girlfriend, thinking we were alone in the house. Her little brother found us having sex on the couch, took a pic and said, "You are now both my slaves." He ran upstairs and locked his bedroom door. FML

#9797503
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14942) - you deserved it (36772)

On 04/11/2010 at 4:11am - intimacy - by junior - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was with my girlfriend, thinking we were alone in the house. Her little brother found us having sex on the couch, took a pic and said, "You are now both my slaves." He ran upstairs and locked his bedroom door. FML

#9797503
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14942) - you deserved it (36772)

On 04/11/2010 at 4:11am - intimacy - by junior - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was with my girlfriend, thinking we were alone in the house. Her little brother found us having sex on the couch, took a pic and said, "You are now both my slaves." He ran upstairs and locked his bedroom door. FML

#9797503
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14942) - you deserved it (36772)

On 04/11/2010 at 4:11am - intimacy - by junior - United States (Arizona)

Today, I came back from a week long class trip. My mother took it upon herself to replace my bed sheets and clean my room. Apparently, she found a note under my mattress from my ex-boyfriend. It said "For all you future dudes, Connor was here first!" FML

#9645798
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25763) - you deserved it (7257)

On 04/05/2010 at 3:32am - intimacy - by FASHlONABLE - United States (California)

Today, fifteen minutes after dinner was served, my blind date says "It's good that you're smart. Not to be rude, but most girls aren't. I mean, at some point, I'm going to pull my dick out of your mouth and then it's good if you have something interesting to say." Check please. FML

#9643258
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35339) - you deserved it (7089)

On 04/05/2010 at 1:14am - intimacy - by Hate2Date (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I took pills to make sure I lasted longer with my girlfriend. Good news? It worked fine and is still working now. Bad news? We've been done for a good two hours. FML

#9516462
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9563) - you deserved it (25735)

On 03/31/2010 at 12:44am - intimacy - by imsorrylove - United States

Today, my schlong decided to enter Mortal Kombat with my pants zipper. Guess which of the two won a flawless victory? FML

#9133208
277 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24883) - you deserved it (6677)

On 03/16/2010 at 2:55pm - health - by liu_kang - United States

Today, I was telling my sister about the stupid sorts of questions I get asked at work. She looked at me and said "I give you five years until you turn into a raging, chain-smoking corporate bitch." My mom agreed. FML

#9031003
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16874) - you deserved it (3634)

On 03/12/2010 at 8:23pm - work - by ams (woman) - United States (Missouri)



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