Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

sanchezjesus368

Search for a member

sanchezjesus368

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 14 May 1985 (29 years)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 2274
  • Number of comments : 10
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About sanchezjesus368 : Hello. I see that you were curious to learn more about me how cute. Well if you really want to get to know me add me on Xbox-MonsterHunter32.

sanchezjesus368's page activity

Visits<b>taylor21398</b> - the 11/29/2013 at 6:49am<b>daveyyyyh</b> - the 11/04/2013 at 4:25pm<b>whos_ur_daddy1</b> - the 11/04/2013 at 4:01pm<b>Booda_Shun</b> - the 10/13/2013 at 12:39pm<b>olpally</b> - the 09/07/2013 at 11:53pm<b>fuzzylumpkins19</b> - the 08/09/2013 at 9:17am<b>semper_amo</b> - the 06/04/2013 at 11:13am<b>Zazoo1995</b> - the 05/07/2013 at 11:53pm<b>mvc3ftw</b> - the 05/01/2013 at 5:40pm<b>xxoriginalnamexx</b> - the 04/10/2013 at 10:40pm<b>dead_insects</b> - the 04/10/2013 at 7:35pm<b>MythicalPanda</b> - the 04/10/2013 at 1:25pm<b>XxKingQuacksxX</b> - the 03/19/2013 at 6:59pm<b>psychplease</b> - the 03/18/2013 at 5:37pm<b>oj101</b> - the 01/27/2013 at 2:01am

sanchezjesus368's FML badges

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of sanchezjesus368's badges

sanchezjesus368's favorite FMLs

Today, at work, my friend dared me to answer the next call on my phone by saying, "This is your local sperm bank. You jack it, we pack it." I did it. The person on the phone was my boss. FML

#19682982
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10505) - you deserved it (40651)

On 05/26/2012 at 10:42am - intimacy - by girly girly - United States (Texas)

Today, I was at the supermarket checkout. I handed over my items, which included some tampons, tissues, and toilet roll. The security guard standing beside the cashier remarked loudly, "I'll be damned; she's flowing from every hole!" FML

#19623439
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37919) - you deserved it (3969) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/14/2012 at 6:23pm - misc - by lafinesse (woman) -

Today, my wife told me she was pregnant. I don't remember having sex since last year. FML

#19611188
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34480) - you deserved it (5268)

On 05/12/2012 at 10:42am - intimacy - by rj - United States (Kansas)

Today, my girlfriend gave birth to our first child. Our nurse was the lady I had a one night stand with 3 nights ago, and yes she remembered me. FML

#19584401
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13296) - you deserved it (168844)

On 05/06/2012 at 9:44pm - intimacy - by T3STI (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend and I were making love. I was really close to climaxing, when he suddenly stopped, smirked, and said, "Hang on, I'm buffering." FML

#19580511
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30402) - you deserved it (3541)

On 05/06/2012 at 2:39am - intimacy - by Kwalker3 - United States (California)

Today, I was at the supermarket when I saw an elderly lady slip on a wet patch of floor. I ran over to help, and I almost fell too before steadying myself. Then some pimply cockmunch of a teen decided to kick my legs out from under me and walk away while laughing his balls off. FML

#19558069
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24924) - you deserved it (1986)

On 05/01/2012 at 12:17pm - health - by karmafails (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, it was my wedding day. With my best friend as the priest, she asked, "Do you take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband?" After saying I do, she then turned to him and asked, "Do you want to bang my friend?" Everyone laughed, except my already disapproving father. FML

#19514689
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27602) - you deserved it (4217)

On 04/23/2012 at 12:04am - love - by gottalovefriends - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I had to put one of my preschool students in timeout for masturbating during nap time. FML

#19486028
324 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38244) - you deserved it (3601)

On 04/17/2012 at 8:07pm - intimacy - by lindsaykay - United States

Today, I was looking through my Internet browsing history. Apparently my wife had searched "How to have an affair without getting caught". FML

#19484156
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35564) - you deserved it (2280)

On 04/17/2012 at 2:11pm - love - by Jason199615 - United States (Missouri)

Today, I held up my best friend with a lighter shaped like a gun, and jokingly accused him of sleeping with my wife, only to have him admit that he really did. FML

#19477249
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47259) - you deserved it (5193)

On 04/16/2012 at 4:12am - intimacy - by oface13 (man) - United States

Today, I thought about how my dad went to get me a Halloween costume and hasn't come home yet. That was 11 years ago. We've moved twice since then. FML

#19369767
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39130) - you deserved it (2444)

On 03/29/2012 at 12:53pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I made a new friend. He seemed pretty cool, until we came to the topic of religion and the ancient alien theory. I'm seemingly now friends with a guy who thinks alien Jesus raped an Earth woman, and we're the resulting cross-breed. FML

#19355965
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18851) - you deserved it (3150)

On 03/27/2012 at 3:40am - misc - by blueglover - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend called and said she had great news. Turns out I've cured her of that illness she gets every month. FML

#19276120
249 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28923) - you deserved it (18098)

On 03/14/2012 at 3:51am - misc - by daddy-o - United States (Utah)

Today, I caught myself yelling at the girl in the porn I was watching for looking at the camera every other second. FML

#19187545
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9498) - you deserved it (32658)

On 02/29/2012 at 5:36am - intimacy - by areyouserious - United States

Today, my husband and I went to our first counseling sessions, where the main focus was communication. When the therapist called us in together to discuss techniques we could use at home, my husband looked around, rolled his eyes, and responded with, "Uh huh" to every question. FML

#19144209
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21469) - you deserved it (3406)

On 02/23/2012 at 2:59am - love - by atsukobo (woman) - United States (California)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: