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salyssac

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salyssac

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Sunday 14 October 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 311
  • Number of comments : 18
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 13 posted

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salyssac's page activity

Visits<b>anonymouslover48</b> - the 07/01/2015 at 7:32am<b>kittykat1501</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 7:04pm<b>Greions</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 5:36pm

Fucked!<b>kittykat1501</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 1:04am

salyssac's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

salyssac's favorite FMLs

Today, while at the store, I realized how socially inept I am when I said "excuse me" to a shopping cart because it was in my way. FML

Today, after several years of having her help me out by doing household chores, I bought my fifteen-year-old daughter a new pair of jeans. Her reaction was to squeal, "Master has presented Dobby with clothes. Dobby is free!" FML

#19463606
587 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14242) - you deserved it (56255) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 04/13/2012 at 10:06pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - France

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. The lights kept on going on and off. Why? The lights are activated by "clap on, clap off." It killed the mood. FML

#18150434
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35325) - you deserved it (9184)

On 11/03/2011 at 7:48pm - intimacy - by KayleeXLoVe21 - United States (New York)

Today, I came home to my empty apartment. My girlfriend had left a note on the floor that said: "Took my stuff and left. Took your stuff and pawned it." FML

#17994746
232 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37551) - you deserved it (4900)

On 10/16/2011 at 12:22am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, for the first time, I beat my brother in a game of CoD. Not being a gamer, I was ecstatic. Later, when I was in the shower, my brother snuck in the bathroom, yelled "Napalm strike!" and threw our cat over the shower curtain like a furry grenade from hell. FML

#17981940
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45184) - you deserved it (5066)

On 10/14/2011 at 12:11pm - kids - by MLGreco - United States

Today, as my girlfriend and I were making love, and she started to moan and groan. All of a sudden, she stopped and said "I'm lying, you suck at this." FML

#16339516
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52070) - you deserved it (17633)

On 05/25/2011 at 4:23am - intimacy - by katie -

Today, I was driving when I saw a spider hanging from the ceiling of my car. I'm terrified of spiders, so I was watching it instead the road. When I looked back at the road, I had just enough time to swerve to miss the fire hydrant but not the tree. Even the cop laughed at me. FML

#14552215
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11670) - you deserved it (29433)

On 01/12/2011 at 8:29am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, my boyfriend tried to serenade me with The Sex is Good by Saving Abel. According to him, "I have to fake it, I'd leave if I could. I'm not in love, but the sex is good." FML

#14521815
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25264) - you deserved it (3693)

On 01/09/2011 at 3:17pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I came home from a long day at work to find a path of rose pedals from the front door. Gasping with surprise, I followed it past the living room... past the bedroom... into the kitchen, where there was a note that said "Friends coming over tonight, we need food, love you!" FML

#7353628
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32962) - you deserved it (3856)

On 01/15/2010 at 3:33am - love - by Romantic (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my girlfriend was telling me how concerned she was about her weight. I told her not to worry, because it gives more cushion for the pushin' anyway. She picked up a lamp and threw it right at my dingleberries. FML

#6679644
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7922) - you deserved it (68486)

On 12/09/2009 at 12:09pm - love - by ouch (man) - United States (California)

Today, my aunt came into the world. My 67 year-old grandfather married a 24 year-old woman who just gave birth to my new aunt, who is 18 years younger than me. FML

#6117794
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42706) - you deserved it (3276)

On 11/02/2009 at 11:10am - misc - by notsohappyniece (woman) - United States (Alabama)



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