salmonodin

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salmonodin

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Saturday 5 December 1992 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 529
  • Number of comments : 33
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About salmonodin : Other people's FML's make my life seem a little brighter.

salmonodin's page activity

Visits<b>Trollx</b> - the 08/24/2013 at 7:08pm<b>dcg1375</b> - the 03/13/2013 at 2:54am<b>sonnywithachad</b> - the 02/02/2013 at 5:35am<b>youtubetre</b> - the 05/30/2012 at 11:19am<b>LookOnBrightSide</b> - the 05/20/2012 at 3:25am<b>roundnproud</b> - the 05/13/2012 at 5:22pm<b>herbrightskies</b> - the 05/06/2012 at 4:33am<b>DJ_Chutfield</b> - the 04/24/2012 at 1:57pm<b>lmc94</b> - the 03/31/2012 at 1:53am<b>downtime</b> - the 03/16/2012 at 4:48am<b>Quest_</b> - the 03/12/2012 at 2:04am<b>boopityboppity</b> - the 03/05/2012 at 4:47pm

salmonodin's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

See all of salmonodin's badges

salmonodin's favorite FMLs

Today, I tripped and fell on the sidewalk. As I did, a car that was passing by stopped, made a U-turn, and then came back so the people inside could laugh at me. When they were done taunting me, they made another U-turn and continued back in their original direction. FML

by Anonymous / 06/18/2012 at 10:39am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I received my first negative feedback on my otherwise flawless eBay record. The woman who bought the item said it wasn't as delicious as she was expecting, so there must be something wrong with it. What was I selling? A new and unopened lipstick. FML

by facepalm / 06/05/2012 at 10:48am / United Kingdom (Bristol, City of) / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked in on my mother stroking my cat and murmuring, "Don't worry, kitty. One day, you and I... we will rule." FML

by Scared / 06/04/2012 at 8:54pm / United States (Virginia) / Animals

Today, my parents grounded me for finding their stash of weed. The irony is killing me right now. FML

by ironyisabitch / 06/02/2012 at 1:43am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my husband and I were pulled over by a cop. He was still angry from our earlier argument over his constant freeloading, and when the cop told him we'd been doing 75 in a 55, he retorted, "Yeah? I did 75 in your mom last night, fuzzball." One more ticket I have to pay for. FML

by me / 05/18/2012 at 10:41pm / United States (Michigan) / Money

Today, I got a parking ticket while I was in the car. I didn't even notice it happen. Ninja cops do exist. FML

by Anonymous / 05/07/2012 at 10:52pm / United States / Money

Today, I had to re-grade a student's assignments because neither he, nor his parents can read "Spanish." I'd written in cursive. FML

by Anonymous / 03/22/2012 at 1:13am / United States (Washington) / Work

Today, I found a $10 bill on the ground. I got so excited and felt like I was the richest person alive. That was, until the wind blew it out of my hand, never to be seen again. FML

by MoneyMoneyMoneyMonayMONAY / 03/21/2012 at 4:13pm / United States / Money

Today, while driving home from school, I noticed one of our hot quarterbacks in the car behind me. Trying to impress him, I pulled into the driveway of an expensive-looking house. To my horror, he pulled in behind me and asked what I was doing at his house. FML

by brooke / 03/21/2012 at 1:12pm / United States (Florida) / Kids

Today, I was on the train ride home from a trip to Florida, and I gave my mom a call. While we talked, I made an offhand comment that all my friends back home must miss me. She knowingly asked if I meant my Sims and my cat. FML

by lyla / 03/20/2012 at 3:15pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was speaking to an old friend and I asked her how her mother was. She replied, "She passed away, you came to her funeral last month." FML

by elizabethyeo / 02/20/2012 at 5:01am / Australia (Western Australia) / Miscellaneous

Today, after my credit card was stolen, the thief made donations to charitable associations. Now I feel bad for asking for the money back. FML

by zobara / 02/01/2012 at 11:35pm / Switzerland / Money

Today, I found out my little sister is marrying my ex, and that my mother set them up. FML

by Random / 01/31/2012 at 9:41am / United States / Love

Today, I attended an elderly man's funeral. As I approached the casket his wife said, "Thank you for coming." I replied with, "No, thank you." FML

by me / 01/24/2012 at 10:40pm / Canada / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to tell my teenage son that no, his knowledge of the English language was not passed down to him genetically. FML

by Tabby / 08/06/2011 at 4:39pm / United Kingdom / Kids