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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, me and my family watched the video of my birth. In the video, when my mother sees me for the first time, she says "God he's ugly!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (20847) - you deserved it (1260)
On 01/21/2009 at 1:02am - misc - by mat - Sent from mobile version
Today, my girlfriend offered a blow job, but my hair got stuck in her braces so instead we tried to pull them all out. And no, I didn't get any. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21294) - you deserved it (8608)
On 01/18/2009 at 10:20pm - intimacy - by gjh - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I decided to jack it a few times because I haven't been laid in a while. After round 3 my ex called me up and said she wanted to 'talk.' When she came over she made it abundantly clear that she wanted to make whoopie. Couldn't get it up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14814) - you deserved it (27018)
On 01/18/2009 at 11:30am - intimacy - by f__k_it - United States (Oregon)
Today, my boyfriend told me that he was gay and that he is in love with my younger brother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35233) - you deserved it (1924)
On 01/18/2009 at 7:41am - love - by Wenny - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I was told that my mom and her new husband have named my new born brother "Titan". FML
I agree, your life sucks (16056) - you deserved it (1139)
On 01/14/2009 at 10:49pm - misc - by isthisajoke - United States (California)
Today, I was having a cybersex chat with a "girl" on a website whilst at work. I noticed my colleague who sits next to me start cracking up with laughter. Turned out it was him I was chatting with and he was winding me up. Worst thing is it had given me a stiffy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7837) - you deserved it (34761)
On 01/14/2009 at 3:49am - intimacy - by diddlysquat - United Kingdom (Wakefield)
Today, like every other day, I turn up at work at the security guard's gate to show my ID badge. Except that my brother had stuck a huge "FBI" sticker on it. My co-workers now all call me Mulder. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9276) - you deserved it (1642)
On 01/13/2009 at 4:47am - work - by MAC - Sent from mobile version
Today, I saw a friend in the street but he didn't see me, so as a joke I decided to ring him. He took his mobile out of his pocket, sighed and didn't pick up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24657) - you deserved it (2201)
On 01/12/2009 at 9:47pm - misc - by patty - Sent from mobile version
Today, I came home from work. I crept up to the bedroom to gently wake up my girlfriend. I touch her shoulder and slowly leant in to give her a tender kiss. She suddenly wakes up and grabs me by the throat... I keep forgetting she's in the army. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19492) - you deserved it (5605)
On 01/09/2009 at 10:23pm - love - by Cùchulainn - Sent from mobile version
Today, I signed up on one of those "cheater" dating sites. I ended up meeting my own girlfriend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10098) - you deserved it (51142)
On 01/07/2009 at 6:56pm - intimacy - by Lou Czar - United States (Oregon)
Today, my ex girlfriend that I still love sent me a text, quote "I still love you, but i'm not IN love with you" um. what? FML
I agree, your life sucks (16244) - you deserved it (1965)
On 01/07/2009 at 2:23pm - love - by wtf - United States (Michigan)
Today, I received a really nice red satin set of underwear, with a bra, a thong and a corset... From my grandfather. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20319) - you deserved it (1115)
On 01/07/2009 at 6:43am - misc - by noname - Sent from mobile version
Today, well, last night, I told my girlfriend that I'm a light sleeper, and that the slightest disturbance will wake me up. As a result, this morning when I looked in the mirror I noticed a bunch of stuff written all over my body, like "You see, you didn't wake up!", "Nor now!". FML
I agree, your life sucks (4881) - you deserved it (21625)
On 01/04/2009 at 10:33pm - love - by titou - Sent from mobile version
Today, I was playing GTA4 and went on its fake dating site to email a girl to go on a date with. I've never had much luck with dating in real life, so I figured the game would be more kind to me. After a while I went back to check my email, and the fake girl I'd propositioned told me to get lost. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13705) - you deserved it (5249)
On 01/01/2009 at 1:22pm - love - by Danno - United States (Louisiana)
Today, I went onto my computer and found a cyber sex conversation between my sister and my girlfriend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25969) - you deserved it (1695)
On 12/31/2008 at 10:49pm - intimacy - by - Sent from mobile version
Monday 20 May 2013
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