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rottentomatoes

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 19 March 1997 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 8232
  • Number of comments : 289
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About rottentomatoes : Just so you know, I made this account before I knew about the site. I do watch a lot of movies though.

Feel free to message me.

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rottentomatoes's favorite FMLs

Today, while at a family gathering for New Years, my aunt said she needed a flat surface to write on. My dad immediately piped up, "Why don't you use Samantha's chest?" I'm Samantha. I'm also 18. FML

#14412798
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34084) - you deserved it (3299)

On 12/31/2010 at 7:05pm - misc - by ilik3catz (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house and badly needed to pee. Just as I was about to say I had to go to the bathroom, my boyfriend suddenly put his hands around my stomach and picked me up. He hit just the right spot, causing me to empty my bladder then and there. FML

#14409585
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32434) - you deserved it (4087)

On 12/31/2010 at 2:03pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I realized that I'll have to explain to my child that mommy and daddy met on World of Warcraft. FML

#14376347
232 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14998) - you deserved it (48635)

On 12/29/2010 at 12:20am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was walking dogs for the animal hospital I work for. I accidentally dropped the leash, and in my haste to retrieve it, I frantically grabbed the ground. I got the leash, and a handful of fresh dog poo emitted from the dog I was walking. FML

#14365818
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20184) - you deserved it (4812)

On 12/28/2010 at 3:13am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I was told I sound like a seal barking when I orgasm. FML

#14365542
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28226) - you deserved it (7355)

On 12/28/2010 at 2:44am - intimacy - by sealy (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I saw my first boobs ever, at 18, volunteering at a retirement home. FML

#14306986
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39550) - you deserved it (7270)

On 12/23/2010 at 3:18am - intimacy - by David H. -

Today, I was naked on top of my boyfriend looking lovingly into his eyes. He then started to use my boobs as punching bags while singing "Eye of the Tiger". FML

#14305984
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41861) - you deserved it (8815)

On 12/23/2010 at 1:36am - intimacy - by nemo518 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my six year old told me I have a big nose. When I told her that she hurt my feelings, she laughed and said "Don't be silly mummy, ugly people don't have feelings." FML

#14199055
294 comments

I agree, your life sucks (118263) - you deserved it (15978)

On 12/14/2010 at 3:21am - kids - by uglywoman - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I woke up to my kids shaking me, saying, "Get up, Santa was here!" I got up to find my TV, computer and MacBook Air all gone. FML

#14191427
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37735) - you deserved it (3168)

On 12/13/2010 at 2:32pm - kids - by crazycora (woman) - Belgium (Antwerpen)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me via facebook. I don't even have a facebook. My friends had to tell me. FML

#14160726
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33967) - you deserved it (2962)

On 12/11/2010 at 12:05am - love - by itsover (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my wonderful boyfriend asked me if I wanted him to cook me scrambled eggs with sausage for breakfast. When I said yes, he pulled out his junk, and started shaking it violently in my face. FML

#14058992
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35594) - you deserved it (9660)

On 12/02/2010 at 10:54am - intimacy - by sissydlk (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend told me one of the main reasons he started dating me was because I have the same name as his ex, whose name he has tattooed on his back. FML

#14034734
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34092) - you deserved it (3267)

On 11/30/2010 at 10:50am - love - by tattooed (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, a guy at my work asked if I could fix his computer in his cubicle. The first thing I see on the screen when he logs me onto it is an anime porn game with tentacles. My boss walks by, stares at me and then laughs uncontrollably. FML

#14033332
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30313) - you deserved it (3316)

On 11/30/2010 at 3:48am - intimacy - by Jack -

Today, my doctor told me to buy some KY Jelly and a dildo to help "loosen me up" so sex isn't so painful. I haven't been able to have sex for 6 months because it hurts so badly, and now my doctor has basically told me to go fuck myself. FML

#13937569
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35045) - you deserved it (7831)

On 11/22/2010 at 2:36pm - intimacy - by painfulintercourse - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my teacher turned around from the blackboard and screamed, "Stop chewing your gum like a cow!" That wasn't so bad.--The bad part was when she realized it was me, she apologized saying, " I am sorry. You are not really a cow. I don't want to traumatize you; you're just overweight." FML

#13836684
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34924) - you deserved it (7675)

On 11/14/2010 at 2:31am - misc - by teach (woman) - United States (California)



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