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rottentomatoes

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 19 March 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 7473
  • Number of comments : 289
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About rottentomatoes : Just so you know, I made this account before I knew about the site. I do watch a lot of movies though.

Feel free to message me.

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rottentomatoes's favorite FMLs

Today, I started my shift as a cop, patrolling the streets on a bicycle. Everywhere I went, gangs of youths yelled stuff out at me, like "Bike twat", "Pig on wheels", "That's a girl's bike you muppet" and "Go on wanker, do a wheelie." FML

#17607153
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28257) - you deserved it (7887)

On 08/28/2011 at 6:37pm - work - by Andrew - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, my son was eating a plum. I was busy in the kitchen, and he came running in saying "Mummy my plum is wet", I told him it was fine and bit a bit off to prove it. He looked at me and said "No Mummy! Can you wash it please, I dropped it in my potty". I feel ill. FML

#17606704
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30613) - you deserved it (8692)

On 08/28/2011 at 5:25pm - kids - by cjay2200 - United Kingdom (Lincolnshire)

Today, I was installing updates on my 16 year old daughter's laptop, when I got the urge to snoop around. I found a 5,000 word sex story involving her and the Edward and Jacob weirdos from the Twilight movies. I can't even look her in the eyes. I can't believe I raised this freak. FML

#17589386
678 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30182) - you deserved it (49176)

On 08/26/2011 at 9:13pm - kids - by f*ckingdisgusted - United States

Today, my dad looked me dead in the eyes and told me that if I wanted to join the Lingerie Football League, I would have his approval. His drunken friends nodded in agreement. FML

#17588509
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30552) - you deserved it (2803)

On 08/26/2011 at 7:32pm - misc - by Alexis - United States (Virginia)

Today, I had to take my dog to the vet for him to be put to sleep. I could feel the cold, hard shaft of irony slide its way up my ass and slowly fuck me senseless with every step I took on this beautiful National Dog Day. FML

#17586114
232 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31404) - you deserved it (5443)

On 08/26/2011 at 1:49pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend wrote me a break-up letter, using Comic Sans. FML

#17576599
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31160) - you deserved it (4010)

On 08/25/2011 at 10:33am - love - by hendrix1 - United States (California)

Today, some blowhard on a motorcycle yelled at me for jaywalking, causing him to almost hit a dumpster. He picked up and threw an empty beer can at me when I started giggling at the sticker on the front of his helmet that said "If you can read this, I have lost my caravan." FML

#17572437
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8132) - you deserved it (22785)

On 08/24/2011 at 10:07pm - misc - by josie345 - United States

Today, my house got watermeloned. Not egged, watermeloned. FML

#17564993
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37301) - you deserved it (3277)

On 08/24/2011 at 1:28am - misc - by skichick54 - United States (Washington)

Today, I was baking cookies. I stared at them for 15 minutes and finally asked my dad, "Why are these taking so long?" He looked up at the oven and replied, "It might help if you turn the oven on." FML

#17558329
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9171) - you deserved it (45039)

On 08/23/2011 at 2:18pm - misc - by Kendal - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I work by myself at a retail store and I was bored so I called my boyfriend. I woke him up and he was feeling frisky, and as things were getting heated I started to moan and say dirty things. Until the entire rack of clothes fell over and revealed my boss hiding. He had a boner. FML

#17557500
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18811) - you deserved it (51045)

On 08/23/2011 at 12:18pm - intimacy - by MissCan'tKeepAJob - United States (Texas)

Today, I applied to live in a barn. FML

#17554659
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22360) - you deserved it (7701)

On 08/23/2011 at 1:39am - money - by Anonymous - United States

Today, this girl who has been stalking me for almost 7 months sent me a 12 page text comparing her love for me with her passion for cheese. FML

#17547922
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33673) - you deserved it (3242)

On 08/22/2011 at 1:19pm - love - by Say Cheese - United States (Michigan)

Today, while riding in the car with my mother, we got into an argument, at which point she pulled the vehicle over, took the key out of the ignition and used it to turn off the passenger airbag. She then continued driving in silence. FML

#17526290
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33283) - you deserved it (4474)

On 08/20/2011 at 2:23am - misc - by W1D0 - United States (Illinois)

Today, I had to utter the phrase "OK, but no cape during sex" to my girlfriend. FML

Today, I woke up to my roommate sniffing my underwear. He said he was checking if they were clean, so he could borrow them later. Which may have been reasonable, if I weren't still sleeping in them. FML

#17516529
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41401) - you deserved it (2868)

On 08/19/2011 at 2:32am - intimacy - by leftwardfoil (man) - United States (New Jersey)



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