Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

rottentomatoes

Search for a member

rottentomatoes

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 19 March 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 7371
  • Number of comments : 289
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About rottentomatoes : Just so you know, I made this account before I knew about the site. I do watch a lot of movies though.

Feel free to message me.

rottentomatoes's page activity

Visits<b>DMITRENAK15</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 10:39pm<b>TheSovietOnion</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 3:19pm<b>nataliewby</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 3:28pm<b>Ilikepie467</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 3:57am<b>Imjuststr8n4sty</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 11:20pm<b>Broadway_Vayne</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 11:23pm<b>KitchKraft</b> - the 08/02/2014 at 4:35pm<b>GalaticStatic</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 6:19pm<b>bronysweg1337</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 2:15pm<b>TrippingOnAcid</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 6:18am<b>isabelly</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 3:45pm<b>deusetnatura</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 4:53pm<b>KitzaKid69</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 3:52pm<b>buckydargon</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 5:11pm<b>Juicenub</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 8:01am<b>xivoricbutterfly</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 10:33pm<b>Tezoma</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 10:56pm<b>violetsweety</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 4:22pm

rottentomatoes's FML badges

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

See all of rottentomatoes's badges

rottentomatoes's favorite FMLs

Today, I brought my date home to meet my parents. We walked in the front door to find my drunken father wearing nothing but a Viking helmet, and swinging and jabbing our living room furniture with a pool noodle. FML

#17711935
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26991) - you deserved it (2651)

On 09/10/2011 at 3:01pm - misc - by Hailey Antone - United States

Today, my parents overheard me having sex with my girlfriend. They thought it would be funny to barge in with nothing but underwear on. This has happened twice now. FML

#17710745
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33049) - you deserved it (25480)

On 09/10/2011 at 11:46am - intimacy - by RetroDayDreamer - United States (Texas)

Today, I realized too late that a picture in my school Powerpoint presentation of thousands of New Zealand sheep, was actually a picture of thousands of naked men in a field. FML

#17709255
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15100) - you deserved it (31274)

On 09/10/2011 at 3:11am - misc - by FullOfNick (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, desperate after a very painful breakup, I poured my heart and soul out to my old teddy bear. When I finished, I asked what he would do in my situation. Right on cue, a gust of wind came through the window and sent him falling off the windowsill and crashing head-first onto the floor. FML

#17706108
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34273) - you deserved it (6050) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 09/09/2011 at 7:18pm - love - by Angie - France

Today, I was at the book store when a book caught my eye: Overcoming Anxiety For Dummies. I wanted to look through the book but I was too nervous to pick it up, thinking everyone in the store would look at me. FML

#17698757
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28853) - you deserved it (5334)

On 09/08/2011 at 8:01pm - health - by Mack - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I heard on a TV show that it's possible to fit a standard light-bulb in your mouth, but it can't be removed afterwards. I just had to try this out. And then visit the local hospital to get it removed. FML

#17695095
293 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7830) - you deserved it (60584)

On 09/08/2011 at 6:00am - health - by Stuck (man) - United States

Today, my fiancé played Rockband drums from the bathroom while taking a crap. He actually managed to properly hit notes. FML

#17690581
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20926) - you deserved it (3857)

On 09/07/2011 at 7:02pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I lied to my diary about getting laid. FML

#17686832
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39885) - you deserved it (27379)

On 09/07/2011 at 4:51am - intimacy - by sadsadperson (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, while playing a gig with my band, I tried pulling the classic "playing the guitar with one foot on the monitor" rock-star pose. However, I misjudged the height of the monitor, didn't notice the puddle of beer in front of it, slipped, and fell off the stage into the security guy. FML

#17679142
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9744) - you deserved it (24266)

On 09/06/2011 at 8:07am - misc - by NotKeithRichards - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was on the toilet at work. After a very loud and very smelly session, I waited until the other stall had been vacated to keep my anonymity. As I leant forward for some toilet roll, my ID fell out of my pocket and into the next stall. When I came out, it was face up near the sink. FML

#17678479
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22421) - you deserved it (4253)

On 09/06/2011 at 4:06am - work - by Shamed - United Kingdom

Today, a five year old that I am babysitting picked up a knife and said he would chop my nuts off if I didn't give him his ice cream before dinner. Only 5 more hours to go. FML

#17672212
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28988) - you deserved it (2994)

On 09/05/2011 at 4:23pm - kids - by thatoneguy - United States (Texas)

Today, my husband compared me to his parent's dog. Why? Because when I sleep I fart and scare myself awake... Just like his parents dog. FML

#17671695
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25002) - you deserved it (9243)

On 09/05/2011 at 3:19pm - animals - by anonomys (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I approached my daughter and told her she needs to clean her room. Her response was, "Thank you Captain Obvious." She's 4. FML

#17670632
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26989) - you deserved it (9270)

On 09/05/2011 at 1:04pm - kids - by kidswithnomanners (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I overheard my parents planning on how to get me to move out of the house. It's my house. They only came to visit and forgot to leave. FML

#17668711
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38413) - you deserved it (2777)

On 09/05/2011 at 6:59am - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, I decided to work out. Being too embarrassed to run in public, I instead ran in circles in my basement. FML

#17666764
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28161) - you deserved it (13789)

On 09/05/2011 at 12:38am - health - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)



Korrig'Anne's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Korrig'Anne's illustrated FML
  • So, have you ordered it? Have you got it? No? Yes? Do you have any idea of what I'm talking about? OK, for the normal people, I'm talking about the new iPhone 6. Apparently, it came out today. I'm not…

Friday 19 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: