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rogerover

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rogerover

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2686
  • Number of comments : 197
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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rogerover's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at the supermarket checkout. I handed over my items, which included some tampons, tissues, and toilet roll. The security guard standing beside the cashier remarked loudly, "I'll be damned; she's flowing from every hole!" FML

#19623439
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39276) - you deserved it (4074) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/14/2012 at 6:23pm - misc - by lafinesse (woman) -

Today, my boyfriend cuffed my legs to the bed. After the sex we discovered one of the cuffs wouldn't open. After an hour of trying to pry them open, I had to waddle with him to the fire station to have them removed in front of 4 amused firefighters. FML

#19576314
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22672) - you deserved it (8003)

On 05/05/2012 at 8:07am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Israel (Tel Aviv)

Today, it was snowing, and the campus looked just lovely. I sat on a nearby window ledge to enjoy the view. I was joined by a girl who looked fascinated as well, so I decided to make small talk. She nodded, smiled wistfully, and said, "There's herpes in the air today." FML

#19525973
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23971) - you deserved it (2695)

On 04/25/2012 at 2:22am - intimacy - by intheairtonight (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was watching a boys volleyball team warming up, and I had my eye on one of them who was quite attractive. He sent the ball a little too far and it hit me in the face. He apologized, and I then for some reason replied with, "It's fine, I like balls in my face." FML

#19475030
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19220) - you deserved it (36812)

On 04/15/2012 at 9:13pm - intimacy - by lifeonfire12 (woman) - Canada

Today, I was watching a boys volleyball team warming up, and I had my eye on one of them who was quite attractive. He sent the ball a little too far and it hit me in the face. He apologized, and I then for some reason replied with, "It's fine, I like balls in my face." FML

#19475030
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19220) - you deserved it (36812)

On 04/15/2012 at 9:13pm - intimacy - by lifeonfire12 (woman) - Canada

Today, while walking down the street, I saw a man attacking a woman in an alley. I ran to help, and shoved the man away from her. Except it turns out he wasn't attacking her; he was getting it on with his fiancée. FML

#19363644
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30154) - you deserved it (5007)

On 03/28/2012 at 1:31pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, after getting a pat of appreciation from my girlfriend's father for taking it slow, he found me later, in her room, with my head between her thighs. FML

#19187510
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16971) - you deserved it (44075)

On 02/29/2012 at 5:07am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, after suffering with bad constipation and having to eat special bread to get me to go, I have practically just pooped out a week's worth of food in 15 minutes, and I'm still going. I've passed the ring of fire stage, now I just can't feel my asshole. FML

#19174199
278 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35144) - you deserved it (5322)

On 02/27/2012 at 10:55am - health - by awhmaaan - United Kingdom

Today, my mom tried to give me the sex talk, while I was mounting my boyfriend. FML

#19146778
232 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14403) - you deserved it (33394)

On 02/23/2012 at 3:25pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my husband and I were about to have sex. As soon as I got on top, he started speaking in a robot voice, then demanded that I call him "the Fuckinator." FML

#19136346
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34220) - you deserved it (5000)

On 02/22/2012 at 12:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was watching a movie in the basement with my boyfriend when we started to get a little frisky. My mom walks down with dirty laundry and tells him to stop it because I'm creaming all over my undies. She showed him a pair of dirty ones to prove it. FML

#18937632
256 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48676) - you deserved it (8179)

On 01/28/2012 at 9:34pm - intimacy - by Tiana - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was watching a movie in the basement with my boyfriend when we started to get a little frisky. My mom walks down with dirty laundry and tells him to stop it because I'm creaming all over my undies. She showed him a pair of dirty ones to prove it. FML

#18937632
256 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48676) - you deserved it (8179)

On 01/28/2012 at 9:34pm - intimacy - by Tiana - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was going through airport security. Trying to get things over and done with quickly, I dropped my pants without a second thought. Turns out they just wanted me to remove my shoes and belt. FML

#18936126
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7925) - you deserved it (30240)

On 01/28/2012 at 6:31pm - misc - by GothicbunnyxC (woman) - Canada (Prince Edward Island)

Today, I waited on an elderly man whose wife had just left him. After him going on and on about how his dog will love his leftover chicken, I nervously caught a case of verbal diarrhea and uttered, "Well, if there's chicken involved, I'll get on my knees and be your dog." FML

#18886717
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9280) - you deserved it (30703)

On 01/23/2012 at 12:12am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. My mum walked in and told him to pull out and show her that he was wearing a condom, and not just saying he was. FML

#18200253
258 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56959) - you deserved it (8437)

On 11/09/2011 at 7:55am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)



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