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redpie's favorite FMLs
by ilovemymomma / 05/26/2012 at 3:15am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by MALICEG / 05/26/2012 at 3:00am / United States (Oklahoma) / Miscellaneous
Today, I started my third day of a student exchange program in Belgium. My room-mate is a guy, our beds are in the same room, and he's always in and out of the bathroom. Consequently, I don't have nearly enough privacy to choke the cock, if you know what I mean. FML
by MySummerinEurope / 05/25/2012 at 6:59pm / Belgium (Brussels Hoofdstedelijk Gewest) / Intimacy
by KieRendan / 05/25/2012 at 3:59pm / United States (New Mexico) / Miscellaneous
Today, on the brink of a stiflingly hot summer, I've come to a terrible realisation. It seems the apartment I've just moved into has been specially insulated to trap enough heat inside for the occupants to survive the planet's next Ice Age. FML
by Broon / 05/25/2012 at 3:55pm / United Kingdom (Leeds) / Transportation
by Anonymous / 05/25/2012 at 2:21pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 05/25/2012 at 1:56pm / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous
by Lonely_Army / 05/25/2012 at 12:03pm / Qatar / Miscellaneous
Today, after 5 months of unemployment and hardcore job searching, I got hired for my dream job. I called my mum to tell her all about it, to which she responded, "Great honey! Now all you need to do is lose all that weight". She allowed me all of 4 minutes of feeling good about myself. FML
by daddyowl / 05/25/2012 at 12:32am / Canada (Quebec) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 05/24/2012 at 9:37pm / United States (Kansas) / Kids
Today, a drunk man wearing a sandwich-board proclaiming that, "The end is nigh" threw some so-called holy water at me while bellowing, "It's what Jesus would've wanted" and that I should "repent for being an evil shite." FML
by Notasinner / 05/24/2012 at 6:39pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous
Today, the mailman delivered my new phone to my neighbour's house. This was okay, because he left a note in my mailbox informing me so. Now my crazy neighbour won't give me the package because, "*I* signed for it!" FML
by Byebye / 05/24/2012 at 3:30pm / Netherlands (Groningen) / Miscellaneous
by that guy / 05/24/2012 at 12:41pm / United States / Geek
by Anonymous / 05/09/2012 at 6:09pm / Egypt (Al Qahirah) / Kids
by Kwalker3 / 05/06/2012 at 2:39am / United States (California) / Intimacy
- Today, I realized that due to my anti-depressants, I can no longer orgasm. At. All. Which depresses… Today, after having sex with my boyfriend, he said that I should go to the bathroom so we don't end… Today, I was at my girlfriend's house. We decided to have sex in her basement. All awesome, until…