Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

purpleamandapand

Search for a member

purpleamandapand

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 29 April 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1436
  • Number of comments : 54
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 10 posted

About purpleamandapand : A small town girl in Ontario, Canada. Young, in high school, spending my time reading other people's misfortune :)

purpleamandapand's page activity

Visits<b>delhh</b> - yesterday at 11:03am<b>xxnick2dmaxx</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 10:28pm<b>AE101</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 2:06pm<b>pro10splayer</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 10:26pm<b>SpiderInsomniac</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 11:05pm<b>Demonface54</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 1:26pm<b>Squtchy</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 12:52pm<b>Elucidator</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 12:41pm<b>Random4Dayz</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 1:44am<b>singer0421</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 3:28am<b>ex_omer</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 6:45pm<b>weraru</b> - the 06/28/2014 at 6:55pm<b>wjsgkrbs</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 4:12pm<b>lil_ham1644</b> - the 05/09/2014 at 11:48am<b>Haleywainwrite</b> - the 04/24/2014 at 1:37pm<b>glushkaguy13</b> - the 04/05/2014 at 6:07pm<b>Narttu</b> - the 04/05/2014 at 1:36pm<b>Matthew86</b> - the 04/04/2014 at 1:49am

purpleamandapand's FML badges

Follow up

You subsequently gave feedback by commenting on an FML that you’d submitted and was published.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

See all of purpleamandapand's badges

purpleamandapand's favorite FMLs

Today, I turned on the TV just in time to see my picture on the news. I have no idea what they said about me. FML

#20043967
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29360) - you deserved it (2473)

On 08/27/2012 at 2:45am - misc - by masterman - Canada (Alberta)

Today, in the midst of sleep, my boyfriend hurled my cellphone across the room and into the wall because he couldn't be bothered to pick up or hang up an incoming call. FML

#19395712
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17572) - you deserved it (2808)

On 04/02/2012 at 3:42pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I found out that all the things I've lent to my best friend over the last few years that have never been returned were actually pawned off so she could pay her cable bill. FML

#19395452
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22468) - you deserved it (2817)

On 04/02/2012 at 2:44pm - money - by Kelly (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was re-watching my wedding video. As I was walking down the aisle, you could hear my grandfather mutter "Here comes the bride, all fat and wide." FML

#19250410
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35734) - you deserved it (5268)

On 03/10/2012 at 9:20am - love - by Anonymous - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I tried to give my friend a fist bump. He thought I was trying to punch him so he punched me in the face. FML

#18785359
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25222) - you deserved it (4837)

On 01/12/2012 at 2:24pm - misc - by Anon (man) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I couldn't contain my laughter when a patient told me she'd named her unborn daughter Twinkie. FML

#18728006
399 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31652) - you deserved it (4835)

On 01/06/2012 at 5:49pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I picked up a hitchhiker. He was well dressed, and seemed trustworthy. As soon as he got in, he pulled out a gun and stole my wallet and car. All of this occurred in front of a sign warning against picking up hitchhikers. FML

#18703158
222 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10613) - you deserved it (77111)

On 01/04/2012 at 1:28am - money - by hitchhiked - United States (California)

Today, I found out the hard way what it sounds like when you take the first letter of my first name, A, and put it with my last name, Hole. FML

#18533442
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22643) - you deserved it (3308)

On 12/17/2011 at 2:47am - misc - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, my son told me he was afraid of monsters under his bed. When I poked my head under to show him nothing was there, the family cat sprang out and clawed me in the face. Now I have a gash on my chin, and my son refuses to go anywhere near his bed. FML

#18336712
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31327) - you deserved it (3276)

On 11/24/2011 at 12:07pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, my son told me he was afraid of monsters under his bed. When I poked my head under to show him nothing was there, the family cat sprang out and clawed me in the face. Now I have a gash on my chin, and my son refuses to go anywhere near his bed. FML

#18336712
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31327) - you deserved it (3276)

On 11/24/2011 at 12:07pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, the main topic for my sister and her friends in the car was how many ways they could think of to kill me. They came up with 137. I have to spend a week with these people. FML

#18279244
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24631) - you deserved it (2297)

On 11/18/2011 at 4:01am - health - by xattackattackx - United States (Hawaii)

Today, my potbellied pig ate my neighbor's award-winning flower garden, that she has been growing for almost three years. She'd told me that she was bringing the judges of the competition, in which she was in line to win $300, to her house in two days. I have yet to tell her. FML

#17494205
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20701) - you deserved it (14008)

On 08/16/2011 at 10:05pm - misc - by otter - United States (Washington)

Today, I decided to prank my boyfriend by putting a pair of panties in his coat pocket. I stormed in and confronted him with the "evidence". I guess the prank worked; he broke down and confessed to cheating on me. FML

#17452928
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30794) - you deserved it (39518) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/12/2011 at 7:15pm - love - by Anonymous - France

Today, I got a call from a creditor asking for a Sarah. I told them that I'm not Sarah, nor do I know one. They then asked if she was my wife. Annoyed, I said, "Alright, when did I get a wife? I don't even remember having a girlfriend." They sniggered and hung up. FML

#17175800
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25125) - you deserved it (6723)

On 07/19/2011 at 10:41am - misc - by Miriden - United States

Today, I had to dig up my twin boys birth certificates for baseball registration. Turns out I had been calling both of them by the other twin's name for eight and a half years. FML

#16847763
277 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17455) - you deserved it (61267)

On 06/25/2011 at 9:39am - kids - by beekeke45 - United States (New Hampshire)



FML's blog

  • Matteor's illustrated FML #2
  • So, is everyone back from their vacation? Can we get back to regular programming? No? OK, I get it. You're all still crying about not being at the beach any more, well, I am anyway. And this time of year…

Thursday 11 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: