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promarkchris

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promarkchris

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  • Number of visits : 607
  • Number of comments : 56
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 6 posted

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promarkchris's page activity

Visits<b>AKCowboysFan</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 8:52pm<b>southernbellle</b> - the 05/01/2014 at 5:33pm<b>SokDek</b> - the 05/29/2013 at 5:23am<b>Daschundman</b> - the 05/19/2013 at 12:36am<b>capnbzarr</b> - the 02/22/2012 at 12:37pm

promarkchris's FML badges

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Consolation prize

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One ring to rule them all

You submitted an FML that was successfully published on the website. This makes you an exceptional human being.

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promarkchris's favorite FMLs

Today, my daughter told me that when she dies, she'd like her ashes spread on her laptop. FML

#19475890
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22133) - you deserved it (3056)

On 04/15/2012 at 11:10pm - kids - by sigh (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I gave myself paper cuts on the sides of my mouth while licking the cover of a pudding cup. FML

Today, I still can't find a job to support myself. The only experience I have is a month in retail and a summer spent in a kitchen de-pooping shrimp. FML

#19333832
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17889) - you deserved it (3495)

On 03/23/2012 at 5:46pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I visited the doctor. I had food poisoning last week, which led to diarrhea. The diarrhea was so bad it caused a hemorrhoid. The hemorrhoid somehow became infected. One bad sandwich, and now I have an infected asshole. FML

#19063795
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32818) - you deserved it (2270)

On 02/13/2012 at 7:03am - health - by loveinanelevator (man) -

Today, at around 2am, I was walking through a parking lot to my car when a man walking behind me told me not to be scared. I turned around to tell him there was no problem. He was naked. FML

#18991669
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31500) - you deserved it (2755) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/04/2012 at 11:39am - misc - by DarkDolly - France

Today, I accidentally told my mom to ejaculate the flash drive from the PC. FML

#18976293
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17288) - you deserved it (21835)

On 02/02/2012 at 1:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - India

Today, my boyfriend texted me saying he had left a surprise on my driveway. Thinking it was something special, I went outside to look. It was a little bag of mayonnaise packets. FML

#18750908
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22917) - you deserved it (3475)

On 01/08/2012 at 9:41pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I found out the hard way what it sounds like when you take the first letter of my first name, A, and put it with my last name, Hole. FML

#18533442
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23260) - you deserved it (3383)

On 12/17/2011 at 2:47am - misc - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, my 7-year-old daughter came up to me in a noisy mall and said "boo-boo" pointing to her hand. Not paying enough attention, I kissed her hand to make her feel better. She grimaced and said "No dad, bird poo." FML

#18525865
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25991) - you deserved it (12590)

On 12/16/2011 at 4:08am - kids - by Oily (man) - New Zealand (Waikato)

Today, my mom, who is relatively new to Facebook, posted on her friend's wall, telling her about her recent diagnosis of vaginal thrush. She assumed that her wall post was private. Six of my friends liked the post. FML

#18417580
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33868) - you deserved it (2962)

On 12/03/2011 at 6:23am - intimacy - by djkimmaz - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, my gynecologist told me that the ecosystem in my vagina is unbalanced, and that I have to do some reconstruction. Uhm what? FML

#18324369
259 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29192) - you deserved it (4548)

On 11/23/2011 at 4:36am - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I kindly asked my crazy roommate to move out. She answered by stuffing raw hamburger meat down all the drains in the apartment. FML

#18260182
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25601) - you deserved it (2783)

On 11/15/2011 at 11:15pm - misc - by ledon (woman) - Canada (Newfoundland and Labrador)

Today, I was driving home from work with the window down. I felt what I thought was rain coming through the window, until I looked over and realized it was urine mist coming from the cattle truck next to me. FML

#18195085
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30955) - you deserved it (3033)

On 11/08/2011 at 6:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while performing a rectal exam on my female patient, I inadvertently said, "Okay, you're going to feel some pleasure now." I meant "pressure". Her husband was in the room. FML

#18014569
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42235) - you deserved it (8548)

On 10/18/2011 at 11:01am - intimacy - by imy - United States (Texas)

Today, I'd just finished feeding my parrot and sweeping all the seeds under the cage. As I was walking away, my parrot whistled. I turned around to see him get up onto the food dish, pick up a clawful of food and toss it on the floor. FML



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