prettyinpunk1025

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Offline (the 02/19/2015 at 4:00am)

prettyinpunk1025

3Fucked!

prettyinpunk1025
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 25 October 1991 (24 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 7106
  • Number of comments : 74
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About prettyinpunk1025 : Hey the name is Sam... If you want to know anything about me, or just want to chat, send me a message. Although I'm usually on the app, so it may take me a while to respond.

prettyinpunk1025's page activity

Visits<b>jwolt92</b> - the 07/13/2016 at 1:31pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 06/07/2016 at 6:25am<b>PinkaLotaPoka</b> - the 03/13/2016 at 8:50pm<b>TyroneLeBron</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 11:20am<b>FMLollipop</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 7:31am<b>hannah_cheers</b> - the 12/06/2015 at 1:02pm<b>bazookajoey</b> - the 11/19/2015 at 11:01pm<b>mongoosemike</b> - the 10/20/2015 at 9:59pm<b>jacksonpm23</b> - the 10/18/2015 at 3:25am<b>llwad0717</b> - the 08/31/2015 at 5:02pm<b>FoxHunt9119</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 10:24pm<b>MdMan2</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 2:01pm<b>ppajeihdn</b> - the 08/05/2015 at 11:59am<b>Necropool</b> - the 08/03/2015 at 5:44am<b>CynicallyAlive</b> - the 08/01/2015 at 11:11am<b>Aly_donawho</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 12:55am<b>kannan4</b> - the 06/17/2015 at 8:47pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 3:50pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 10:31pm<b>FoxHunt9119</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 4:25am<b>Aly_donawho</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 6:55am

prettyinpunk1025's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of prettyinpunk1025's badges

prettyinpunk1025's favorite FMLs

Today, I had my first threesome. It was me, my wonderful girlfriend, and her shithead cat after he decided my balls were a bag of catnip and just had to play with. Things ended pretty fast. FML

by OnlyAvailableID / 02/08/2015 at 3:35am / Australia / Animals

Today, my 97-pound pitbull wagged and chased his tail while I was being mugged. FML

by ZAnon / 02/06/2015 at 2:06am / United States (Texas) / Animals

Today, I was holding the door open for a friend. She told me to wait a second because she had to finish a text. Nearly a minute passed before I asked why she wouldn't come inside to finish typing. We were at a Chinese restaurant. She thought the "No MSG" sign meant you couldn't text inside. FML

by cls_x / 02/24/2013 at 2:53am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I stole a pen from the doctor's office while she wasn't looking. Later on at work, I idly pulled the pen out during a meeting. My colleague looked at me, horrified. The pen had the words "minimally invasive gynecological surgery" emblazoned on it. I'm a man. FML

by Anonymous / 02/21/2013 at 9:56pm / United States (New York) / Work

Today, I was driving without my seatbelt on, when I noticed a police car approaching. I panicked and desperately fumbled around for my seatbelt, only for them to pass by with just a funny look. Then it hit me that I was riding my motorcycle. FML

by ELparano / 12/28/2012 at 8:21pm / Canada / Transportation

Today, I set up a spy cam in my room to find out which one of my pervy brothers has been using my computer to watch porn. Turns out it was actually my father. I now have a video of him sitting in my chair masturbating, and I can't get it out of my head. FML

by Anonymous / 12/28/2012 at 2:05pm / Malaysia (Selangor) / Miscellaneous

Today, a girl mistook me for her boyfriend and broke up with me because I'm "a liar and a cheating bastard." I've never seen her in my life, but I'm so lonely that I tried to convince her to give me another chance and stay with me. FML

by Alone / 12/28/2012 at 12:24am / United States / Love

Today, my car was broken into. What was stolen? My daughter's $11 One Direction poster. What will it cost to fix my car? $1,000. FML

by Anonymous / 12/27/2012 at 11:58pm / Canada (Alberta) / Money

Today, while sharing a few beers on the couch with my boyfriend, he drunkenly uttered the fateful words, "Babe, if I could suck my own dick, you'd be single as HELL." FML

by well, i am now / 12/27/2012 at 7:24pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I caught my dog chewing on a tampon applicator. I tried to grab it from him, but he wanted to play "keep away" and ran outside. Like a dumbass, I chased after him in my underwear, earning myself the attention of my neighbors on each side of my driveway. FML

by ScoozieBooze / 12/20/2012 at 1:17pm / United States (New Mexico) / Miscellaneous

Today, the girl I dumped three years ago because she wouldn't take my band seriously is now a successful and rich environmental scientist. Meanwhile, I'm still unemployed, living with my parents, and can barely remember how to play a guitar. FML

by rightinthekarma / 12/19/2012 at 10:26am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, my boyfriend ended our relationship. He called me from his mobile phone, claimed to be a trauma surgeon, and told me with a bad German accent that my "boyfriend" had been in a fatal car crash earlier in the day. What the hell is wrong with this idiot? FML

by Anonymous / 05/23/2012 at 1:20pm / Switzerland (Zurich) / Love

Today, I had to collect my daughter from the hospital. Her boyfriend was even more upset than she was, because his iPhone's screen was damaged beyond repair when the doctor pulled it out of my daughter's vagina. FML

by smart move there / 05/16/2012 at 12:10pm / Ireland (Kildare) / Intimacy

Today, I found out the hard way that it is possible to sunburn the soles of your feet. FML

by Leadamp / 05/15/2012 at 6:39pm / Health

Today, I found out the hard way that it is possible to sunburn the soles of your feet. FML

by Leadamp / 05/15/2012 at 6:39pm / Health