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porkpork

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  • Number of visits : 1118
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porkpork's page activity

Visits<b>egamage</b> - the 05/26/2011 at 4:35am

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porkpork's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend sent out a mass text to everyone on her contact list. She's getting married in a month. I didn't propose to her. FML

#16149658
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39013) - you deserved it (3236)

On 05/12/2011 at 9:09pm - love - by Whosthegroom (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, as a prank, a friend and I tied a 10 dollar bill to a fishing line, and yanked it away from people as they reached for it. It was going really well until one of our victims pulled a knife and chased us around the block. FML

#16144015
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13334) - you deserved it (52985)

On 05/12/2011 at 1:53pm - misc - by Jackassed - United States (New York)

Today, I had a full on "conversation" with my cat about her laying off the catnip. I really need to get out more. FML

#16138835
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11317) - you deserved it (23912)

On 05/12/2011 at 12:41am - animals - by Anonymous -

Today, my 12 year old son came home from school and informed me that he bought an air guitar for $20. He honestly thinks this is a good price. FML

#16113855
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33592) - you deserved it (11182)

On 05/10/2011 at 1:18am - kids - by Whatdididowrong? -

Today, an unpaid intern had his first day at my workplace of seven years. As a joke, my boss gave him the same challenge she gave me on my first day. The intern completed it in 37 minutes. We've always been told it's impossible. Guess we all have to start working harder. FML

Today, my date asked if I could drive his friend home before we went out for breakfast. His friend had blonde hair, big boobs and wore a skimpy black dress. He wasn't 100% sure of her name. I guess I drove home my date's one night stand. FML

#16076552
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34661) - you deserved it (11000)

On 05/07/2011 at 9:25am - intimacy - by lawl (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I realized that I frequently argue with myself and respond back. FML

#16075274
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23480) - you deserved it (12187)

On 05/07/2011 at 3:08am - misc - by sillyfox4lyfe (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I found myself crying for an hour when my recreated crush on The Sims 3 game rejected my character and ran off with someone else. FML

#15978808
251 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17137) - you deserved it (51461)

On 04/29/2011 at 3:34pm - love - by Nxydolli (man) - United Kingdom (Durham)

Today, my drunk dad started yelling at my dog for not having a job. FML

#15962479
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44317) - you deserved it (4760)

On 04/28/2011 at 11:53am - animals - by Cecilly2010 -

Today, I once again told my son he needed a job and a girlfriend because I simply could not keep him in my house anymore. He yelled, "No, I can do whatever I want!" Then went back to playing video games. He's 38. FML

#15960842
371 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28928) - you deserved it (41371)

On 04/28/2011 at 7:07am - kids - by oldmama728 -

Today, my football coach thought it would be a good idea to get drunk, run to the other sideline, and scream, "WELCOME TO SPARTA, BITCH!" This would've been funny if he weren't also my dad. FML

#15960632
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34816) - you deserved it (3719)

On 04/28/2011 at 6:28am - misc - by spartanson -

Today, my wife bought $80 worth of Glee songs on iTunes. FML

#15940298
335 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50721) - you deserved it (9656)

On 04/26/2011 at 9:20pm - money - by Chad - United States

Today, I actually heard my 14 year old son muse to himself, "If I can drive drunk in Grand Theft Auto, how hard could it be in real life?" FML

#15935332
357 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39070) - you deserved it (12186)

On 04/26/2011 at 3:20pm - kids - by nomorexbox - United States (Georgia)

Today, my "friend" told me I was weird and irritating. Yet she has an unhealthy obsession with Harry Potter, hates people in general, and has a Facebook for her cat. Yeah, I'm the weird one. FML

#15931410
314 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33971) - you deserved it (7763)

On 04/26/2011 at 5:45am - animals - by weirdome23 (woman) - United States

Today, I was mugged. The guy mugging me was eating a banana. FML

#15917217
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32099) - you deserved it (6769)

On 04/25/2011 at 8:11am - misc - by wtfisthisworldcomingto -



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