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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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pjunior89

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pjunior89
  • Town/Country : Rock Vegas, USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 13 June 1989 (22 years)
  • Number of visits : 2246
  • Number of comments : 48
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About pjunior89 : There's absolutely nothing about me that anyone would even consider somewhat interesting.

pjunior89's last visitors

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pjunior89's favorite FMLs

Today, I was walking around in the mall when I dropped my purse. When I bent down to pick it up, some guy came up behind me, humped my ass, then ran away laughing. FML

#11435482 (414)

I agree, your life sucks (49521) - you deserved it (9521)

On 06/24/2010 at 8:45pm - intimacy - by WorstLifeEver - United States

Today, my girlfriend, who is a dog trainer, was telling me all about the techniques she uses at work. I commented on how the dogs must be stupid to fall for such simple tricks, to which she replied "They worked on you." FML

#5203249 (85)

I agree, your life sucks (7208) - you deserved it (29328)

On 09/12/2009 at 8:00am - love - by TrainedBF (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I took this girl out that I've been crushing on for 2 years to a fancy restaurant. At one point during the date, I had to get up to take a massive dump. As I was walking back to the table, a little boy stood up and shouted, "THAT'S THE POOPOO MAN" in front of the whole restaurant. FML

#5198874 (86)

I agree, your life sucks (31597) - you deserved it (3486)

On 09/12/2009 at 12:12am - misc - by taman (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I went to buy a cake for my daughter's birthday. She really loves Twilight, so I decided to get her a vampire-related cake. I wrote down "fangs" as a decoration. The baker thought it said "wangs". My 10 year old daughter's cake has wangs all over it. Her party is tomorrow morning. FML

#4374994 (381)

I agree, your life sucks (33990) - you deserved it (6114)

On 08/08/2009 at 12:04am - misc - by TheCake - United States (Florida)

Today, I was talking with a close friend (who is a virgin) about why he did not want to have sex with a prostitute. He told me that "It's not nice to know that the girl you are having sex with has slept with half the country", he then added "That is exactly why I would not have sex with you". FML

#4307488 (173)

I agree, your life sucks (12411) - you deserved it (43883)

On 08/05/2009 at 12:29pm - intimacy - by unlucky (woman) - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, a friend offered to have sex with me, since I'm a 19 year old virgin who's only been kissed. He then added on that I would have to give him my Wii in return. FML

#4159325 (187)

I agree, your life sucks (37437) - you deserved it (4697)

On 07/30/2009 at 11:52am - intimacy - by VelocityMary (woman) - United States - moderated by the Jackass crew

Today, I finally got the courage to ask out the guy I've liked for a long time. He's a cashier at a grocery store. It was about 1am and I was his last customer, everything seemed just right. Just when I was about to ask him to the movies, a drunk girl stumbles in and asks him out. He said yes. FML

#4000327 (88)

I agree, your life sucks (35999) - you deserved it (4736)

On 07/24/2009 at 5:32am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - India (Haryana)

Today, I was at Target with my mom and we finished purchasing our items. We had gotten a fan so I said,"This thing is too big to fit in." First thing my mom yells? "THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID!" and starts laughing hysterically in front of the entire store. FML

#3692539 (294)

I agree, your life sucks (38594) - you deserved it (8710)

On 07/12/2009 at 2:25pm - misc - by embarrassed (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I got further with a guy than I've ever before. By that, I mean I got his phone number. FML

#3575019 (187)

I agree, your life sucks (42969) - you deserved it (6336)

On 07/08/2009 at 3:28am - misc - by stupiddddddd (woman) - United Kingdom (Rotherham)

Today, I was walking around town with the girl I have loved for four years and have been 100% faithfull to. A random girl thought it would be funny to approach me and pretend she was the girl I was seeing, and that I was cheating on her. My girlfriend believed her and broke up with me. FML

#3496673 (207)

I agree, your life sucks (61400) - you deserved it (2702)

On 07/05/2009 at 1:59am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was talking to my mother about my sex life, telling her "if I want to have sex I'm going to have sex." She looked at me for a moment and said, "You're staying a virgin until you marry". She wasn't ordering me, she was informing me. FML

#3452744 (89)

I agree, your life sucks (28301) - you deserved it (5378)

On 07/03/2009 at 11:47am - intimacy - by senelbeat - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I found out that my boyfriend is cheating on me, with the same guy I was cheating on him with. FML

#3451487 (533)

I agree, your life sucks (50673) - you deserved it (129404)

On 07/03/2009 at 10:16am - misc - by shandrith (woman) - United States (California)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my friend said he'd give me 20 bucks if I would ask out the ugliest girl in school. I did it. She rejected me. FML

#3171595 (375)

I agree, your life sucks (12651) - you deserved it (70644)

On 06/24/2009 at 11:33am - love - by steven (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my older brother told me that no matter how fast you run at automatic sliding doors, they'll open in time. So I ran at a pair. They don't. FML

#3016666 (233)

I agree, your life sucks (10038) - you deserved it (72680)

On 06/19/2009 at 12:04am - misc - by kat9232000 - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my daughter finally walked down the aisle with a man she loves very much. While I was escorting her, I managed to trip and fall down revealing what I've been trying to hide all of this time: my shiny gleaming bald head that showed when my wig fell off. FML

#2935439 (82)

I agree, your life sucks (37467) - you deserved it (7930)

On 06/16/2009 at 6:49am - misc - by Unlucky (man) - Saudi Arabia (Ar Riyad)