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Perfectionist
Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.
Happy Ending
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
Today, I found out that my resume contained the word "masturbation" in the skills section, courtesy of a practical joke by my best friend. I have been using this CV unsuccessfully for over two months. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22430) - you deserved it (5269)
On 03/13/2012 at 8:51am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)
Today, I was shopping for tampons when a cute guy came over and gave me his number. He said, "Call me in 3 to 5 days." FML
I agree, your life sucks (28384) - you deserved it (4124)
On 03/12/2012 at 9:11am - misc - by Tristansefam1367 - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I was humming the Star Wars theme song while on the bus. When my stop came I walked down the aisle only to hear a girl mutter, "The virginity is strong in this one." She's right. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17305) - you deserved it (16213)
On 03/10/2012 at 1:50am - misc - by starboy - United States (California)
Today, I was half asleep and tried to cuddle my husband as we slept. Still dreaming, he yelled for me to leave his money alone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16081) - you deserved it (3016)
On 03/10/2012 at 1:04am - love - by atsukobo - United States
Today, my husband sat me down on the couch so he could share some "awesome" news with me. He excitedly declared that he and his idiot drinking buddies are planning on running a real-life Fight Club out of our basement. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17845) - you deserved it (2057)
On 03/09/2012 at 9:05pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, my husband and I were about to have sex. As soon as I got on top, he started speaking in a robot voice, then demanded that I call him "the Fuckinator." FML
I agree, your life sucks (27059) - you deserved it (3680)
On 02/22/2012 at 12:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, my husband and I were about to have sex. As soon as I got on top, he started speaking in a robot voice, then demanded that I call him "the Fuckinator." FML
I agree, your life sucks (27059) - you deserved it (3680)
On 02/22/2012 at 12:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I found out if I refuse my boyfriend anything in public, he will continually yell out, "Penis!" until he gets his way. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19629) - you deserved it (6044)
On 01/17/2012 at 6:41pm - misc - by anon. (woman) - United States
Today, after sex, my boyfriend turned to me and said, "You know, sometimes, you look like Kevin Spacey." FML
I agree, your life sucks (19068) - you deserved it (2277)
On 01/17/2012 at 3:26am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Libyan Arab Jamahiriya
Today, my girlfriend's Marine dad walked in on us fooling around naked. Now we can only hang out with "parental supervision". Oh, and I have to record my visits on a clipboard by the door. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16505) - you deserved it (23930)
On 01/12/2012 at 3:16pm - intimacy - by Duplighost (man) - United States (Colorado)
Today, while working at a pizza place with my girlfriend, I called my boss to tell him we were short on sausage. Under her breath I heard my girlfriend say, "sounds like somebody I know." FML
I agree, your life sucks (26382) - you deserved it (2967)
On 01/11/2012 at 7:26pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, while working at a pizza place with my girlfriend, I called my boss to tell him we were short on sausage. Under her breath I heard my girlfriend say, "sounds like somebody I know." FML
I agree, your life sucks (26382) - you deserved it (2967)
On 01/11/2012 at 7:26pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, I fell asleep in class. I'm the teacher; I've already given students detention for falling asleep in class this year. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5175) - you deserved it (25748)
Today, my boyfriend asked me for a blow job. After I said "no" over ten times, he decided to get up and slap me across the face with his penis. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41073) - you deserved it (36315)
On 01/08/2012 at 9:36am - intimacy - by omgwhyme (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, my boyfriend asked me for a blow job. After I said "no" over ten times, he decided to get up and slap me across the face with his penis. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41073) - you deserved it (36315)
On 01/08/2012 at 9:36am - intimacy - by omgwhyme (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)
Monday 20 May 2013
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