Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
About omgwtf99 : MUFASA!
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Today, while babysitting a five year old, I found a cartoon called Metalocalypse for him to watch while I made dinner. I didn't realize it was an "adult" cartoon until afterwards. He watched a whole episode about a clown with a cocaine problem. FML
Today, I got home from work to find my house covered in graffiti dicks, the windows smashed, the front lawn entirely ripped up, and my letter box containing dog shit. I also found a note taped to the door saying, "Suck on this Darren". Darren is my next door neighbor. FML
Today, my son's homework was to write a story about what he wants to be when he grows up. He wrote that he plans on being unemployed and living at home until we throw him out, then he'll live under a bridge. He's only 12, but already planning for a future as an unemployed bum. FML
Today, while driving in a funeral procession I was distracted, missed my turn and yelled "God dammit!" I'm the funeral director; the Priest was in the car with me as I led the funeral the wrong way. FML
Thursday 28 November 2013