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omgwtf99

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omgwtf99

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2813
  • Number of comments : 24
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About omgwtf99 : MUFASA!

omgwtf99's page activity

Visits<b>lmc94</b> - the 05/04/2012 at 11:09pm<b>BballHottie34</b> - the 12/16/2011 at 10:30pm<b>AqsaaaN</b> - the 12/13/2011 at 4:48pm<b>ariannaa</b> - the 11/22/2011 at 6:37pm<b>whoopie13</b> - the 10/17/2011 at 10:36pm<b>JERZBornNRaised</b> - the 09/28/2011 at 2:20am<b>Riiley</b> - the 09/25/2011 at 3:27pm<b>Eckristen</b> - the 06/06/2011 at 11:11am<b>fluffingclouds</b> - the 02/13/2011 at 2:41pm

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omgwtf99's favorite FMLs

Today, while in line at a gas station, I felt something on my shoulder. I turned around only to see a woman behind me pulling the sunburnt skin off my shoulder. When I told her to stop, she yelled, hit me with her purse and ran off crying. FML

#17188929
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43384) - you deserved it (3557)

On 07/20/2011 at 9:38am - misc - by therundown - United States (Ohio)

Today, while babysitting a five year old, I found a cartoon called Metalocalypse for him to watch while I made dinner. I didn't realize it was an "adult" cartoon until afterwards. He watched a whole episode about a clown with a cocaine problem. FML

#17067732
419 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12931) - you deserved it (51497)

On 07/11/2011 at 3:21pm - kids - by dummy (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I got home from work to find my house covered in graffiti dicks, the windows smashed, the front lawn entirely ripped up, and my letter box containing dog shit. I also found a note taped to the door saying, "Suck on this Darren". Darren is my next door neighbor. FML

#17063070
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57167) - you deserved it (2891)

On 07/11/2011 at 3:42am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my family got together to read my grandpa's will. He gave all of his grandkids $400 each. Except me. It seems he thought I'd see the funny side in being bequeathed a blow-up sex doll. FML

#17027029
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35946) - you deserved it (4630)

On 07/08/2011 at 11:10am - intimacy - by Jack - United States (Illinois)

Today, I went to the carnival with a guy I like. When we went on the big scary ride where you flip upside down a lot, he asked me to be his girlfriend. Then, I threw up on him. FML

#16944074
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37849) - you deserved it (4165)

On 07/02/2011 at 1:33am - love - by Amanda - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I found a very large pumpkin super-glued to my car. It will not come off. FML

#16943359
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32209) - you deserved it (3124)

On 07/02/2011 at 12:46am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I tried to comfort my daughter who'd been crying non-stop for hours. She thinks Chuck Norris is coming to kill her, and I can't convince her otherwise. FML

#16936128
307 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34979) - you deserved it (4841)

On 07/01/2011 at 1:42pm - kids - by parenting sucks - United States (New York)

Today, I woke up to a burglar holding a gun. He yelled at me to get up so I did. He then paused and laughed. I was sleeping naked. FML

#16689352
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44660) - you deserved it (6003)

On 06/16/2011 at 1:42am - misc - by mike oxsmall - United States

Today, my son's homework was to write a story about what he wants to be when he grows up. He wrote that he plans on being unemployed and living at home until we throw him out, then he'll live under a bridge. He's only 12, but already planning for a future as an unemployed bum. FML

#16676970
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33562) - you deserved it (7879)

On 06/15/2011 at 12:46pm - kids - by Seriously (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, while driving in a funeral procession I was distracted, missed my turn and yelled "God dammit!" I'm the funeral director; the Priest was in the car with me as I led the funeral the wrong way. FML

#16659246
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13908) - you deserved it (35666)

On 06/14/2011 at 10:23am - work - by patrickalamo - United States (Texas)

Today, I saw my brother on TV after 3 years of no contact. He was being arrested on Cops. FML

#16616782
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44106) - you deserved it (3622)

On 06/11/2011 at 8:54pm - misc - by Sarah (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I found out all about my son's secret online double life. He's been moonlighting for two years as a male prostitute by the name of Peter Parker. FML

#16611980
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39567) - you deserved it (4994)

On 06/11/2011 at 1:25pm - intimacy - by Mom (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my dog surprised everyone by somehow managing to climb on the roof. I followed him up and spent the next hour trying to catch him. FML

#16597604
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24434) - you deserved it (3754)

On 06/10/2011 at 4:39pm - animals - by crazydog (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my boss's cat died. I'm expected to attend the service. FML

#16477855
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30691) - you deserved it (3982)

On 06/03/2011 at 12:47am - work - by whymyliferose - United States (Oregon)

Today, I came home to my front door open and a homeless man taking a 'bath' in my sink. If this wasn't bad enough, he refused to leave because 'finders keepers!' FML

#16243559
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35377) - you deserved it (3573)

On 05/18/2011 at 9:07pm - misc - by Ally (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)



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