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omgwtf99

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omgwtf99

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3568
  • Number of comments : 24
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About omgwtf99 : MUFASA!

omgwtf99's page activity

Visits<b>lmc94</b> - the 05/04/2012 at 11:09pm<b>BballHottie34</b> - the 12/16/2011 at 10:30pm<b>AqsaaaN</b> - the 12/13/2011 at 4:48pm<b>ariannaa</b> - the 11/22/2011 at 6:37pm<b>whoopie13</b> - the 10/17/2011 at 10:36pm<b>JERZBornNRaised</b> - the 09/28/2011 at 2:20am<b>Riiley</b> - the 09/25/2011 at 3:27pm<b>Eckristen</b> - the 06/06/2011 at 11:11am<b>fluffingclouds</b> - the 02/13/2011 at 2:41pm

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omgwtf99's favorite FMLs

Yesterday, I was at my grlfriend's ouse 4 te frst time. I crackd a joke tat offendd er, so se gave me te silent treatment. I ad to pee, an since se wouldn't tell me were te batroom was, I went to look 4 it. I walkd in on er parents making love. FML

#19243836
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40180) - you deserved it (6872)

On 03/09/2012 at 1:59am - intimacy - by banned - United States (California)

Today, mah mother caught me masturbating. Trying to defuse the awkward tension, I said "Oh, I was just thinking about you!" Not a good idea. big fat FML

#19239456
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15158) - you deserved it (51724)

On 03/08/2012 at 2:03pm - intimacy - by Fraser - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I downloadd an application that notifies me when my phone is fully chargd. I had no idea how it actually functions, but I pluggd the charger in and went to bd. A couple of hours later, I woke up to a man's voice screaming, "I can't take it anymore!" I nearly wet myself. FML

#19207930
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30239) - you deserved it (9472)

On 03/03/2012 at 8:55am - misc - by scaredshitless (woman) - Finland (Southern Finland)

TODAY, I ORDERD CHINESE FOOD . AS I APPROACHD THE RESTAURANT TO PICK IT UP, I TOOK OUT MY KEYS AN TRID TO UNLOCK THE FRONT DOOR . BY THE TIME I REALIZD MY MISTAKE, EVERYONE INSIDE THE RESTAURANT HAD NOTICD AN STARTD LAUGHING AT ME . BIG FAT FML

#19175931
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10834) - you deserved it (21017)

On 02/27/2012 at 4:58pm - misc - by Eric - United States

Today, an African-American family cummed into the restaurant athich I work. They said, "Jackson, party of 5." After I laughed, I realized they were serious. FML

#19166851
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17257) - you deserved it (29619)

On 02/26/2012 at 10:31am - work - by Miss_Kristen - United States (Missouri)

Today, my oven decidd that it was going to lock and clean itself right in the middle of cooking my steaks. FML

#19157879
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27024) - you deserved it (3782)

On 02/25/2012 at 12:21am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, mah dad threw a waffle at mah face 4 his own amusement . FML

#19144211
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26567) - you deserved it (6101)

On 02/23/2012 at 3:00am - misc - by ZeroApostle4Ever - United States

Today , Target asked me if I would do te closing announcement. I've only been working tere a littleile , so excited I agreed. I told people , "Te store is now closing , tank you 4 sopping at Walmart." FML

#19088946
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15849) - you deserved it (29250)

On 02/15/2012 at 9:03pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, a train hit me. A slow mini-train full of kindergartnersho were on a tour of the museum I was visiting. mega FML

#19004597
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20766) - you deserved it (5705)

On 02/05/2012 at 9:14pm - health - by MahSquito (man) - United States

Today, A Strangar Told Ma How Proud Ha Was That My Boyfriand An I Wara So Opan With Our Saxuality . For Tha Past Thraa Yaars, Most Strangars Hava Thought Wa Ara A Pair Of Gay Man . I Am A Woman . Maga FML

#18976383
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32944) - you deserved it (7141)

On 02/02/2012 at 1:29pm - love - by Mrs. Man (woman) - United States (Iowa)

TODAY, I FOUND OUT THAT GOOGLE+ HAS BEEN AUTOMATICALLY UPLOADING MAH CELL PHONE PICTURE AS I TAKE THEM. MY FRIEND HAVE NOW SEEN PICTURE OF ME, MAH PENIS, AND OTHER THING TOO HORRIFYING TO TALK ABOUT. FML

#18945896
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14956) - you deserved it (41395)

On 01/29/2012 at 7:26pm - misc - by brannie - United States

Today , I had a swollen knee , an was slowly limping to the toilet. All of a sudden , mom ran past me , beating me to it. As she closed the door , she said , "AT LEAST I CAN RUN!" FML

#18917504
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25850) - you deserved it (2628) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/26/2012 at 5:08pm - health - by Jen_ - France

2day I accidentally slammed a door on my own arm flab. FML

#18915455
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13239) - you deserved it (28395)

On 01/26/2012 at 11:45am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I was working at Staples and organizing some notebooks. All of a sudden, I jumped up because of a sharp pain in mah back. A little girl had grabbed a stapler and stapled mah back. FML

#18876048
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38276) - you deserved it (2286)

On 01/22/2012 at 12:09am - kids - by thosedamnkids (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I turnd on the news to see a live report about an increase in crime in my town . One minute in, my drunk daughter apperes behind the news reporter, butt nakd, dancing . FML

#18845928
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38891) - you deserved it (6188)

On 01/18/2012 at 5:30pm - misc - by MakesMeLol (man) - Ireland (Dublin)



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