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oatmeal_boi

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oatmeal_boi

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 539
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About oatmeal_boi : I usually come on here to read the intimate FML's because those are the funniest :)

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oatmeal_boi's favorite FMLs

Today, two Jehovah's Witnesses rang my doorbell for the 10th time. This time they asked me whether I knew Faith's greatest enemy. I replied, "Basic reasoning?" A copy of The Watchtower can really hurt when it hits you in the eye. FML

#17468167
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34334) - you deserved it (9549)

On 08/14/2011 at 7:20am - misc - by Goaway (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, while walking on the sidewalk, someone hit me with their car. They yelled at me for being in their way. FML

#17426296
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31748) - you deserved it (2953)

On 08/10/2011 at 3:22am - misc - by TheKunitzShow14 - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, a week after my fiancé and I got engaged, his mother is already complaining that she isn't involved enough in the wedding arrangements. We haven't even set a date yet. FML

#17426270
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25957) - you deserved it (2186)

On 08/10/2011 at 3:18am - love - by Potential Bridezilla (woman) - United Arab Emirates

Today, our AC broke. It's 98 degrees inside the house. My parents will be staying at a 5 star resort until the repairman can come to fix the unit in 6 days. They made me stay home to make sure the plants survive. FML

#17425699
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31523) - you deserved it (2654)

On 08/10/2011 at 2:12am - misc - by Username - United States (Texas)

Today, I got caught trying to steal my own cat back from my neighbor. FML

#17423512
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28954) - you deserved it (3352)

On 08/09/2011 at 11:00pm - animals - by Nekro_Kat - United States (California)

Today, I got my eyebrows waxed. The lady who waxed my eyebrows also decided to pop the big zit on my forehead. She charged me a dollar extra. FML

#17418334
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31347) - you deserved it (6614)

On 08/09/2011 at 1:35pm - misc - by pizzaface - United States

Today, at dinner, I accidentally let it slip that I'd taken a small sip of alcohol a few years ago and hated it. My extremely strict parents are now trying to get me into rehab. FML

#17403916
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36797) - you deserved it (6672)

On 08/08/2011 at 2:23am - misc - by ApparentDrugAddict (woman) - United States

Today, my girlfriend freaked out on me because I answered her call on the first ring. According to her, it implies that I'm desperate, always horny, and just want her for the sex. Just last week she got pissed because I waited three rings to answer. Apparently that means I'm cheating on her. FML

#17390536
446 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40962) - you deserved it (5952)

On 08/06/2011 at 8:27pm - love - by FML! - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my girlfriend freaked out on me because I answered her call on the first ring. According to her, it implies that I'm desperate, always horny, and just want her for the sex. Just last week she got pissed because I waited three rings to answer. Apparently that means I'm cheating on her. FML

#17390536
446 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40962) - you deserved it (5952)

On 08/06/2011 at 8:27pm - love - by FML! - Canada (Ontario)

Today, someone broke into my car just to steal the freshly baked cookies in the back seat. They also left a thank you note. FML

#17384157
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29040) - you deserved it (3340)

On 08/06/2011 at 1:53am - misc - by nomorecookies - United States (Missouri)

Today, my dad nearly had a head-on collision with another car, but I grabbed the wheel at the last second, potentially saving both our lives. He spent the rest of the car trip pissed at me because I'd "interfered" with his driving. FML

#17379792
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29354) - you deserved it (2479)

On 08/05/2011 at 5:47pm - health - by laurlaur - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, the woman I'm training at work asked, while staring intently at the keyboard, "now, which one of these buttons is the space-bar again?" She is 80 years old, types about 1 word per minute, and I have just one week to get her completely trained. FML

#17376704
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27372) - you deserved it (2444)

On 08/05/2011 at 10:42am - work - by jhftrainer23 - United States (Iowa)

Today, my roommate demanded that I dance naked for him as a birthday present. When I declined, he offered to pay me. When I declined again, he stormed off to pout in his room and played really loud depressing music. We're both guys and I have 11 months left on my lease with him. FML

#17373472
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40096) - you deserved it (3227)

On 08/05/2011 at 12:46am - intimacy - by Creeped_out_n_stuck (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, while stuck in traffic on the highway, my 5 year old in the back seat asked me why the man in the car next to us was pulling on the other man's "peepee". FML

#17361677
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43256) - you deserved it (2745)

On 08/04/2011 at 12:04am - intimacy - by whatnot - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I realized that as a U.S. Marine in the infantry, I'm more afraid to talk to girls than I am of getting shot at. FML

#17352313
263 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40647) - you deserved it (5463)

On 08/03/2011 at 3:40am - love - by Tim - United States



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