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noncom

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noncom

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2541
  • Number of comments : 137
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About noncom : I am 14, I am a Kentuckian. I plan to have aFord Rranger 4X4 when I can drive. I like Top Gear (Both U.K. And U.S.) I love food that has Bourbon in it. I find keyrings, gas masks, watches, and belts interesting. I usually use the FML app, but sometimes I use the computer, so feel free to message me. And I am a republican.

noncom's page activity

Visits<b>ManualBeatle56</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 8:39pm<b>slayer447</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 9:41am<b>FrustratedJoe</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 11:19am<b>meb123hazel</b> - the 05/30/2014 at 6:57pm<b>KHAOS_KREATOR</b> - the 05/27/2014 at 6:07pm<b>MyUsernameIsBest</b> - the 03/27/2014 at 11:21am<b>aedan12</b> - the 03/16/2014 at 2:47am<b>MichelleRuzicka</b> - the 02/15/2014 at 1:08pm<b>belinasegg</b> - the 01/13/2014 at 12:25pm<b>NatashaLovesYou</b> - the 01/10/2014 at 11:17pm<b>TheCitizens96</b> - the 12/01/2013 at 11:39pm<b>Ambient25</b> - the 11/25/2013 at 8:26pm<b>iMeowchu</b> - the 10/30/2013 at 7:59am<b>aliyourpally</b> - the 10/21/2013 at 9:22pm<b>allforyoux3</b> - the 10/19/2013 at 9:22pm<b>Nolimit2217</b> - the 10/10/2013 at 8:24am<b>purplhaze88</b> - the 10/07/2013 at 7:15pm<b>hazardoussmiles9</b> - the 10/06/2013 at 6:14pm

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noncom's favorite FMLs

Today, a customer broke my nose for refusing to give him a discount because the product he was buying had a fine layer of dust on the box. FML

#20736654
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40724) - you deserved it (2841)

On 06/20/2013 at 2:32am - work - by Whytetrash - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my brother got one of those water-vapour cigarettes. I was playing around with it, and my neighbour saw me through the window. She came over to yell at my parents about my "addiction" to marijuana. When my parents told her to get lost, she called the cops and tried to get me arrested. FML

Today, my parents took my iPad back to the store and exchanged it for two cheap knock off tablets. Reason being my little brother threatened to run away because I had one and he didn't. I bought the iPad on my own after graduation. They kept the difference in price. FML

Today, getting off a bus, it was pouring rain so I got my umbrella out. A man elbowed me in the gut and grabbed it. When I told my mom about it she said, "That's New York, get over it." FML

#20731128
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40766) - you deserved it (5139)

On 06/17/2013 at 8:46am - misc - by newyorkers - United States (New York)

Today, I saw a man on my bike that was stolen a few years ago. I asked him if I could have my bike back just wondering what he'd say. He calmly replied, "Hell no, I stole this fair and square." FML

#20708788
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55988) - you deserved it (6003)

On 06/06/2013 at 12:14am - misc - by anonymous - United States (California)

Today, a few freshmen jumped my fence. They decided to take a dip in the pool, so I pulled out a paintball gun. I unloaded over 100 rounds, painting their backs bright yellow. It also dyed my pool yellow, and it'll apparently cost around $500 to repair. FML

#20691900
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29355) - you deserved it (53377)

On 05/28/2013 at 8:48pm - money - by pool party - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got to wash my ex-wife's dishes at her apartment while her new boyfriend played with my daughter in the living room. FML

#20689927
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52533) - you deserved it (11391)

On 05/27/2013 at 7:34pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my virginal girlfriend of a year graduated from veterinary school. She can shove her arm shoulder-deep up a cow's ass without blinking, but still feels too insecure to even touch my penis. FML

#20596452
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68540) - you deserved it (17854)

On 04/16/2013 at 1:44pm - intimacy - by Gurior - Canada

Today, I attended my aunt's open-casket funeral. My sister spent the first quarter of an hour neither grieving nor celebrating her life, but whining that the "cute" clothes my aunt was dressed in could have been handed down to her, instead of being "wasted". FML

Today, because my boyfriend drives a 2-seated sports car, I had to awkwardly sit on his brother's lap as we drove to the store. I soon felt a poking sensation through his pants, just a few minutes before we hit a bumpy road. FML

#20414298
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48592) - you deserved it (6157)

On 12/22/2012 at 5:55pm - intimacy - by orgasmicriding (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, after two weeks of being grounded, I was finally let out of the house by my mom. I had to call her at 1am asking her to come get me, because I got so drunk, I told my ride to leave without me. I'm grounded again after less than a day of freedom. FML

Today, a co-worker asked me if I have a Facebook account, and I said I do. I had to politely smile as he spent the next half hour insulting me for supposedly being glued to it 24/7, before claiming that it's all a CIA front to steal people's social security details. Why are nutjobs like this even alive? FML

#20175635
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16496) - you deserved it (2685)

On 11/23/2012 at 7:49pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, a nearby volcano erupted for the second time. We were all urged to keep our windows and doors closed in case of ash clouds. My father responded by opening every window and door and shouting, "Come at me, bro!" FML

#20171802
166 comments

Today, I was conducting a meeting regarding safety concerns on my field site. While I made a comment, a client rep yelled out that women don't know construction, and that I should be acting like a proper secretary and should get my boss. I'm the Construction Manager. FML

#20161445
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23900) - you deserved it (1958)

On 11/13/2012 at 1:49am - work - by ConstructionLady (woman) - United States

Today, while at a stop light, I was rear-ended by a car behind me. The guy got angry at me, because according to him, I should've known that his car has poor braking distance, and so I should've moved forward a few more feet to compensate. FML

#20157954
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25474) - you deserved it (1291)

On 11/10/2012 at 7:29pm - misc - by Me - United States



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