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Offline (the 10/24/2016 at 3:00am)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 14 October 1991 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 7620
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About nokkibind : I love animals.

nokkibind's page activity

Visits<b>Tripartita</b> - the 09/29/2016 at 12:27am<b>RichardPencil</b> - the 09/27/2016 at 1:11am<b>TeraBaap</b> - the 08/17/2016 at 3:21pm<b>ruudseriesx</b> - the 08/11/2016 at 7:38am<b>mendini</b> - the 07/31/2016 at 1:18pm<b>buckdharma</b> - the 07/08/2016 at 8:18am<b>meowwiz</b> - the 06/04/2016 at 1:42am<b>Scorpio1691</b> - the 02/25/2016 at 5:26pm<b>nephilim241</b> - the 10/17/2015 at 8:32am<b>FitFriday</b> - the 09/18/2015 at 2:18pm<b>TheBelt</b> - the 09/15/2015 at 12:35am<b>karacakal2</b> - the 06/30/2015 at 6:07am<b>hardesty2904</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 8:41am<b>worldclassrager</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 10:49pm<b>Tarlachia</b> - the 04/21/2015 at 7:02am<b>shutupyou</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 12:43pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/26/2014 at 12:14pm

Fucked!<b>mendini</b> - the 07/31/2016 at 7:18pm<b>buckdharma</b> - the 07/08/2016 at 2:17pm<b>Scorpio1691</b> - the 02/25/2016 at 11:26pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 06/30/2015 at 12:07pm

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nokkibind's favorite FMLs

Today, while at my job as a lifeguard, a little girl got stuck in the shower cubicle because the lock wouldn't open. To get her out, I had to lift the door off the hinges and swing it open, a fairly safe procedure. The hinges broke, though, and I ended up hitting the girl with the door. FML

by caitywebbkid / 10/09/2016 at 7:36am / Australia (Western Australia) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, after spending over two hours cleaning my kitchen from top to bottom, my 5-year-old then runs in, yells, “Snowstorm!” and throws a bag of flour all over the floor. FML

by jaimpastaggle / 10/06/2016 at 10:24am / France / Kids

Today, while working at a bank, I helped a customer who was making a large withdrawal. After I counted out his money, I asked "Do you want the strap on?" After a moment of awkward silence, as I realized how that came out, he smiled and said, "No thanks, I don't need one." and winked. Great. FML

by StarDust5921 / 10/03/2016 at 9:55pm / United States (New York) / Work

Today, a street "musician" drummed on buckets directly outside my work for two hours. Right as I was about to lose it, he stopped playing. Within 5 minutes, someone else started playing the saxophone. FML

by bambisapphic / 10/02/2016 at 7:33pm / United States (Colorado) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I'm sitting in the emergency room because my girlfriend thought it would be funny to superglue my penis to my thigh while I was sleeping. FML

by b.fritz / 09/24/2016 at 6:02am / United States (Missouri) / Love

Today, I tried to have a relaxing soak in the tub. The giant wolf spider that was already in the tub didn't like me trying to set it free outside. It ran right across my feet and back into my house when I dumped it out of a cup outside. I screamed like a little girl. FML

by nopenopenopenope / 09/22/2016 at 11:28pm / United States (North Carolina) / Animals

Today, at my job of 2 months, I'd taken it upon myself to water the plants around the office every day since they all looked a little sad. My boss then asked why so many of the fake plants were getting mouldy. My co-workers had watched me water plastic plants for 2 months and nobody bothered to tell me. FML

by Emyka / 09/21/2016 at 6:51am / Austria / Work

Today, I ate out, even though I was tired. When my main course arrived, I realised I had sent both my forks away with the starter plate. Rather than say anything, I ate dinner with two knives. FML

by knife knife / 09/19/2016 at 8:38pm / United Kingdom (Midlothian) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out what happens when you sleep with a girl your chemistry major friend likes. He put silver nitrate in my body wash and shampoo. I look like I survived an explosion in a Sharpie factory. He says it'll come off "in a few days". FML

by dude i am so sorry / 09/19/2016 at 3:54pm / United States (Virginia) / Love

Today, I'm a janitor at a middle school. Someone took a poo and placed it on the sink. FML

by Crapper. / 09/16/2016 at 4:35pm / United States (North Carolina) / Work

Today, I found out that apparently the pipes for my toilet were never connected, so anything you flush just falls out onto the basement floor downstairs. I've lived here 4 years. FML

by Loose Ends / 09/14/2016 at 7:48pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I pushed my spinning clothesline around and walked off like a badass. A loose wire then whipped around the back of my head and caught me in the eye. I'm just so badass. FML

by Drom / 09/14/2016 at 8:20am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dandruff got so bad that when I sneezed on the bus, it created a "blizzard" of dandruff, covering me, and two others in it. I'm now known as "Winter Wonderland". FML

by Walking in a Winter Wonderland / 09/12/2016 at 6:51am / United States (Florida) / Health

Today, my religious dad caught my brother jerking off and decided to give us both a lecture about it. My brother ended up saying "If god doesn't want me to jerk off, how come he made my knob the perfect shape to fit in my hand?" I burst out laughing and now we're both grounded. FML

by Anonymous / 08/23/2016 at 4:38am / Intimacy

Today, in an effort to try and get fit, I was doing yoga on my carpet when my foot slipped. It went under my radiator, which peeled the skin off my heel like peeling a potato. FML

by AlexB / 08/19/2016 at 3:01am / United Kingdom (Blackpool) / Health