ninja_dino

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ninja_dino

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1864
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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ninja_dino's page activity

Visits<b>lil_jimmy</b> - the 06/01/2015 at 4:48am

ninja_dino's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

ninja_dino's favorite FMLs

Today, I had my girlfriend over and we we're watching a movie in my basement. I run upstairs and pop a bag of popcorn. Later I come downstairs to find my 10 year old brother sitting next to my girlfriend saying," My brother always says he wants to screw your brains out, whatever that means". FML

by CaoNiMa / 03/26/2009 at 11:42am / China (Beijing) / Kids

Today, I repaired a boiler for a wealthy guy in a big house. While there, I fixed a leaking tap for free. When I went to go, the man slipped something into my shirt pocket and said "have a drink on me." When I got to my truck, I discovered that he'd given me a tea bag. FML

by toast / 03/25/2009 at 12:33pm / United Kingdom (Worcestershire) / Work

Today, my boyfriend and I were at his house having sex. After about 30 minutes, his mom came home and was knocking on the door asking "What are you doing?" Thinking I might have a chance to sneak out, I got dressed real quiet. Then my boyfriend answers, "Zoe. I'm doing Zoe." FML

by Zoe123 / 03/19/2009 at 2:05am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I was in an elevator with my brother and a woman. He signs to me that she has a 'damn fine ass'. I chuckle and then shake my head. He shrugs. A second later the woman signs to us, 'Rick, don't you remember me?' Turns out she helped teach my brother sign language when he was six. FML

by elevator-troubles / 03/18/2009 at 3:59am / Australia (Australian Capital Territory) / Miscellaneous

Today, I gave myself a facial with one of those masks you leave on for a while. I busied myself by tidying my room while it dried and eventually forgot all about it. I finally remembered about it after I answered the door to the postman. Not embarassing enough? I'm a guy. FML

by skc / 03/14/2009 at 7:36am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, I got my braces on. When we got in the car my dad looked over and said "well at least we dont have to worry about boys for the next two years." FML

by jajaja / 03/01/2009 at 2:45pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I asked my dad if he could fix my bed. It had been squeaking for some time. He shook his head no. He then continued with, "Your bed is a security system and as far as I can tell, you haven't gotten any in weeks". FML

by Noname / 02/24/2009 at 1:13pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I saw my mom sneaking meat into her spaghetti sauce. She told me she sneaks meat into most of the food she cooks. I've been a vegetarian for 8 years. FML

by j0hn / 02/22/2009 at 9:35pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked past a girl in the cafeteria and she threw up. Naturally, a crowd was drawn. Her friend asked her what was wrong. She pointed at me and said, "Get him away from me!" I had never met this girl. FML

by disgusting / 02/04/2009 at 11:51am / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend out of the blue told me I wasn't fat, that my stomach was flat and it was only my butt that was big. I thought that this was a compliment. His response? "Not at all". FML

by Noname / 02/03/2009 at 3:32am / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, I came home from work. I crept up to the bedroom to gently wake up my girlfriend. I touch her shoulder and slowly leant in to give her a tender kiss. She suddenly wakes up and grabs me by the throat... I keep forgetting she's in the army. FML

by Cùchulainn / 01/09/2009 at 10:23pm / Love

Today, whilst chatting with my mum on MSN, she unintentionally sent me an animated emoticon of a penis jerking off repeatedly. I don't even want to know the type of conversation she was having. FML

by Dina / 11/23/2008 at 4:24am / Intimacy