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newzealand

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newzealand
  • Town/Country : Christchurch , New Zealand
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 3 May 1992 (21 years)
  • Number of visits : 1838
  • Number of comments : 86
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 11 posted

About newzealand : Hi I'm Mike.
feel free to message, keen on making contacts in america as I'm hoping to travel there next year :D

I think my picture says the rest.

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newzealand's favorite FMLs

Today, my football club gave us all jerseys with our last names on them. My last name is 'Flicker'. The letters are all in uppercase. And the 'L' and the 'I' are joined together at the bottom. My jersey reads 'FUCKER'. FML

#1923265
378 comments

I agree, your life sucks (96837) - you deserved it (8076)

On 05/14/2009 at 3:23am - misc - by Flicker (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I took the bus to work and a sweet old lady got on after me and sat next to me. Halfway to work, she fell asleep and her head was on my shoulder. Trying to be nice, I gently tried to wake her up before my stop came. She wasn't sleeping. I let a dead woman lie on me for 30 minutes. FML

#960425
654 comments

I agree, your life sucks (547604) - you deserved it (35281)

On 04/13/2009 at 10:11pm - health - by meteorbabe0101 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I came home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on my bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read "Because you can't find a real girl, I made your current one prettier, Love Mom." FML

#761206
482 comments

I agree, your life sucks (198782) - you deserved it (58759)

On 04/02/2009 at 1:13am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I awoke to the sound of my dad knocking on my dorm room door for a surprise visit. He's barely outside the door and I pull the door open and say hey, when my roommate strips naked pulls the door open, kisses me on the cheek, says in an uber-gay voice, "Thanks for last night", and leaves. FML

#527227
505 comments

I agree, your life sucks (188370) - you deserved it (21061)

On 03/22/2009 at 6:38am - intimacy - by konens_dick (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

#253938
1625 comments

I agree, your life sucks (459678) - you deserved it (571243)

On 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm - intimacy - by RC3Welly (man) - United States (Florida)



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