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newbiehere99

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newbiehere99

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 15 February 1987 (27 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 955
  • Number of comments : 315
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About newbiehere99 : I don't look to people to give me what I already have. My confidence keeps me alive, my faith keeps me moving.

I'm really spontaneous. I'm only on this app for entertainment. I can be funny most of the time, but I also realize I'm not a comedian.

I actually dislike about me boxes -.-

newbiehere99's page activity

Visits<b>hailstorm187</b> - the 09/18/2014 at 7:54am<b>FML987456132</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 1:02pm<b>GoldFishPony</b> - the 06/17/2014 at 2:47pm<b>who_else00</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 10:30pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 10:43am<b>aclark2523</b> - the 04/12/2014 at 2:53pm<b>Chanti</b> - the 03/18/2014 at 4:50pm<b>Jellybellybeanz</b> - the 03/15/2014 at 7:07am<b>emilycardona7</b> - the 01/24/2014 at 4:38pm<b>PaultheBukkit</b> - the 01/06/2014 at 10:06pm<b>tpm45</b> - the 12/22/2013 at 1:59pm<b>theperononfml</b> - the 12/13/2013 at 12:48am<b>kellygranada</b> - the 12/12/2013 at 12:02am<b>Heyboi</b> - the 11/13/2013 at 11:57pm<b>ohishkabibble</b> - the 10/20/2013 at 4:38am<b>meepmerp</b> - the 10/16/2013 at 12:06am<b>noa1029</b> - the 10/07/2013 at 1:26am<b>Rozay333</b> - the 09/14/2013 at 10:51pm

newbiehere99's FML badges

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of newbiehere99's badges

newbiehere99's favorite FMLs

Today, I had dinner with my grandparents. At the table, my grandfather openly complained about how hard it is for him to get out of their hot tub. Not because of his prosthetic leg, but because his balls somehow "get stuck". I really didn't need to know that. FML

#20159093
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17004) - you deserved it (1311)

On 11/11/2012 at 3:27pm - misc - by Miki13 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after finally falling asleep, my boyfriend woke me up and got extremely mad at me. My offense? My pillow was touching his side of the bed. After yelling at me, he's now sleeping on the couch, and I'm lying in bed wide awake. FML

#20158574
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21168) - you deserved it (2584)

On 11/11/2012 at 5:26am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I watched my neighbor shake cat food calling, "Come here Mollie" at his back door. I then saw my own cat run into his house. I now know why my cat is so fat and never replies to me calling her Bonnie. I guess I'm being cheated on. FML

#20158567
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23965) - you deserved it (2474)

On 11/11/2012 at 5:10am - animals - by kitty - Australia

Today, while at a stop light, I was rear-ended by a car behind me. The guy got angry at me, because according to him, I should've known that his car has poor braking distance, and so I should've moved forward a few more feet to compensate. FML

#20157954
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25497) - you deserved it (1291)

On 11/10/2012 at 7:29pm - misc - by Me - United States

Today, I was playing Apples to Apples with my girlfriend and a few others. The card that was drawn was labeled "pathetic". Among other cards that were laid down in attempts to be similar to "pathetic" was my girlfriend's card. She won with a create-a-card labeled "my sex life". FML

#20157215
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19445) - you deserved it (4304)

On 11/10/2012 at 6:02am - love - by anonymous - United States

Today, my husband came home drunk off his ass at 2am. He started crying on my shoulder because he couldn't go home with some beautiful woman who hit on him, because sadly for him, he's married to me. FML

#20157197
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29047) - you deserved it (2588)

On 11/10/2012 at 5:15am - love - by Helen - United States (Arkansas)

Today, my husband came home drunk off his ass at 2am. He started crying on my shoulder because he couldn't go home with some beautiful woman who hit on him, because sadly for him, he's married to me. FML

#20157197
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29047) - you deserved it (2588)

On 11/10/2012 at 5:15am - love - by Helen - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I was told I look like a Simpson. I don't have blond hair, or any of the features of them. So I asked which one. I was told Homer because we both could use Weight Watchers and an education. FML

#20155893
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17705) - you deserved it (3715)

On 11/09/2012 at 1:57am - misc - by Kyle - United States (Georgia)

Today, just like every morning this month, I woke up, put on my clothes, looked out my window, and was pointed at by a man in a ninja outfit on my neighbor's roof. The police still can't find him. FML

#20155776
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26873) - you deserved it (2208)

On 11/08/2012 at 11:54pm - misc - by Targeted - United States (Washington)

Today, my mother-in-law moved in because she has a hip problem. I don't know what's worse, her constant complaining and slob like tendencies, or the eight cats she brought along with her. FML

#20154544
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20565) - you deserved it (1679)

On 11/08/2012 at 12:43am - misc - by David (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was at the airport. I was on my way to see my dad for the first time since I was 4. Whilst I was waiting for my dad to find me, a strange man started flirting with me. Irritated, I told him I was waiting for my dad to get me, and to f*ck off. The strange man was my father. FML

#19887326
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34667) - you deserved it (3482)

On 07/03/2012 at 7:01pm - misc - by BunniesOnAcid - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my husband staggered home after a night of drinking. He was too intoxicated to find the toilet so he started to pee in the cat's litter box. Apparently, he was invading her territory and she attacked him. His scream as she bit and scratched him must have woken the whole world. FML

#19873141
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18282) - you deserved it (2110)

On 06/30/2012 at 9:00pm - misc - by pissed off -

Today, I was T-boned at an intersection. In an ambulance. On the way to the hospital after being T-boned at an intersection. FML

#19873048
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36447) - you deserved it (1675)

On 06/30/2012 at 8:31pm - health - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, I saw my girlfriend walking hand-in-hand down the street with another man. When I confronted her, she claimed she had no idea who I was, and the guy told me to beat it. Later on, she returned to our apartment and actually tried to act as if nothing had happened. FML

#19868224
256 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42698) - you deserved it (2476)

On 06/29/2012 at 9:06pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out just how easy it is to be launched against the wall and sucker-punched into oblivion by a 200-pound former Marine turned professional body-builder. I discovered this after I told my fiancée's dad that we were expecting a baby. FML

#19867923
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25127) - you deserved it (4173)

On 06/29/2012 at 7:57pm - health - by fuckjuggalos (man) - United States (Oregon)



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