Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

neeni88

Search for a member

neeni88

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1731
  • Number of comments : 95
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About neeni88 : I automatically thumb up comments that make me literally LOL. That's what I come on this site/app to do mostly - laugh.

I definitely have a FML situation... I just don't know how to make it funny.

Anyway, if you wanna send me a message, go right ahead. I'm a nice girl and I don't bite - unlike my parrots. :-)

neeni88's page activity

Visits<b>Liiiiiiiiike</b> - 10 hours ago<b>Aquamarine9</b> - 21 hours ago<b>Austrand22</b> - 22 hours ago<b>cina5</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 8:06am<b>twodotgirl</b> - the 07/27/2014 at 2:22pm<b>OysterPearls</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 6:26pm<b>99poonslayer</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 11:44am<b>Bulldozer36</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 10:13am<b>paigexox0</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 12:27am<b>AustinDenton</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 10:43am<b>cailey1234567890</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 3:24pm<b>Zero_TAlent_</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 12:37am<b>Dawminator</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 9:43pm<b>sharklover2017</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 2:32am<b>Owltime22</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 5:25pm<b>mete_orito</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 3:30am<b>Eorlas</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 2:37am<b>metallica_wins</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 1:04am

neeni88's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of neeni88's badges

neeni88's favorite FMLs

Today, my wife and I were watching Killing Kennedy. Jokingly, I said, "Spoiler alert: he dies." She threw a book at me and won't talk to me. I think she's serious. FML

#20953867
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44875) - you deserved it (6905)

On 11/11/2013 at 12:20pm - misc - by Thomas - United States (Virginia)

Today, she did it again. While I was minding my own business reading the paper, she casually walked up to me and slashed my face with her nails, drawing blood and screams of pain. I need to get out of this abusive relationship, but no one will adopt my asshole of a cat. FML

#20950555
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42051) - you deserved it (7880)

On 11/08/2013 at 6:02pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, in the lunch line at school, a kid literally ordered a "hamburger with extra swag." FML

#20950369
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43546) - you deserved it (3267)

On 11/08/2013 at 3:12pm - work - by thank god you'll only live once (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, at work, I had to explain to my co-manager at work what a period was, after he refused to let an employee go change her tampon. Afterwards, he panicked, saying he thought women made that up so they didn't have to have sex, before trying to send her to the hospital and fainting. We're 24. FML

#20944786
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61793) - you deserved it (4029)

On 11/04/2013 at 12:45am - intimacy - by TheTruthofWomen (woman) - United States

Today, my husband and I were watching Jurassic Park. At the end of the movie, he commented on how amazed he was that they could "train those dinosaurs" to do exactly what they wanted them to do. FML

#20937890
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46640) - you deserved it (5053)

On 10/29/2013 at 1:01pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, a hornet thought it would be fun to fly into a candle that I had lit. As the hornet burned to death, it flung its charred body at my face, which is more painful than it sounds. FML

#20936891
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39289) - you deserved it (3075)

On 10/28/2013 at 4:18pm - misc - by Asshole hornet - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I got married. My husband and I had been waiting until marriage to have sex, and when the time came, we started to undress. As I took my bra off, his eyes glazed over, and he fainted. An hour later, all he could say was, "I don't think we're meant to be together." FML

#20936013
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64002) - you deserved it (8498)

On 10/27/2013 at 7:46pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I saw a wasp on the ground, apparently injured and unable to fly. It was being mobbed by ants and looked certain to die, so I stamped on the ants to save its life. At this point it sprung up, stung me, then flew off. FML

#20932403
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36117) - you deserved it (25129)

On 10/24/2013 at 2:04pm - animals - by MBean (man) - Anguilla

Today, a few of my friends arranged for us to go skinny-dipping with the guy I really like. It went really well, until a turd surfaced before our eyes. After we scrambled out of the pool in panic, my crush called us all freaks and left. FML

#20927673
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40686) - you deserved it (5473)

On 10/20/2013 at 3:56pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, after recently complaining that the reality show "The Great Norway Adventure" portrays us as a country of nationalistic rednecks, I saw my drunk dad chasing my uncle on a tractor while bellowing the national anthem at the top of his lungs. FML

#20926483
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42853) - you deserved it (4667)

On 10/19/2013 at 3:37pm - misc - by overly nationalistic redneck (woman) - Norway (Hordaland)

Today, some ass-bandit broke into my house by smashing a window, just so he could steal the ancient VHS cassette player that my wife wouldn't let me throw away. Thanks, scumbag, but the front door was unlocked. FML

#20919168
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43733) - you deserved it (3810)

On 10/13/2013 at 5:50pm - money - by and she blames me -_- (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was hitting on a girl, and I was sure I could get her to sleep with me. When she finally gave in and was putting her number into my phone, she called my mom and asked her if she raised me to "sexually harass women." FML

#20918730
320 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21387) - you deserved it (80629)

On 10/13/2013 at 10:38am - love - by not getting laid - United States (Texas)

Today, I figured out my 1-year-old daughter likes to dip her hand in our dogs' water bowl, and rub the water on her face. So I put the water bowl out of reach. She then figured out how to open the bathroom door and use the toilet instead. FML

#20918462
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39339) - you deserved it (4010)

On 10/13/2013 at 1:51am - misc - by Water Daughter - United States

Today, I heard that there was supposed to be a huge blizzard heading our way, so I went out to stock up on groceries. After spending $600 on food, I drove home and packed most of it into the fridge and freezer just in time for our power to go out. FML

#20918430
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39715) - you deserved it (23629)

On 10/13/2013 at 1:23am - money - by hungry (man) - United States

Today, my mom made fun of me because I'm 16 and have never had a boyfriend, then bragged that at my age she was already pregnant with me. FML

#20918137
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55424) - you deserved it (3223)

On 10/12/2013 at 9:59pm - misc - by roundtherose - United States (Alaska)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: