Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

n3rdzgotskillz

Online | Search for a member

n3rdzgotskillz

63Fucked!

n3rdzgotskillzn3rdzgotskillz
  • Town/Country : Huddersfield, United Kingdom
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 3 April 1994 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3356
  • Number of comments : 114
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About n3rdzgotskillz : I'm Olivia, I study English Language with Creative Writing and I look a lot cooler than I actually am.

I have a hideous Yorkshire accent so don't even bother starting with the whole, "oooh, British girl! Crumpets and tea and scones!" thing because that's not how I sound at all. I'm just telling you so you don't get your hopes up.

n3rdzgotskillz's page activity

Visits<b>sexedkidrauhl</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 3:25pm<b>RA91</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 2:27am<b>lui_pg</b> - the 01/20/2016 at 2:40am<b>AdamPractical</b> - the 01/18/2016 at 10:27pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 01/18/2016 at 8:15am<b>Seashells77</b> - the 01/13/2016 at 10:39am<b>facelick</b> - the 01/11/2016 at 4:43pm<b>Abskb1</b> - the 01/11/2016 at 11:00am<b>gray10</b> - the 01/05/2016 at 2:29pm<b>CreepinCow</b> - the 01/04/2016 at 12:22am<b>10220706</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 11:56pm<b>Grayy</b> - the 12/31/2015 at 12:55pm<b>Westifer</b> - the 12/30/2015 at 4:43am<b>kyuuubbbiii</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 12:53pm<b>hopsinlove17</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 12:51am<b>Tthug</b> - the 12/25/2015 at 11:15am<b>Craven1987</b> - the 12/25/2015 at 10:13am<b>itcouldbeanyone</b> - the 12/25/2015 at 10:01am

Fucked!<b>sexedkidrauhl</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 9:25pm<b>Abskb1</b> - the 01/11/2016 at 5:00pm<b>enginsteve</b> - the 12/10/2015 at 8:37am<b>JayL80</b> - the 12/08/2015 at 7:41am<b>khoov19</b> - the 12/02/2015 at 7:27am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 12/01/2015 at 3:54am<b>2C0OL4SCH0OL</b> - the 11/30/2015 at 10:29pm<b>tiger820</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 4:10pm<b>Mons</b> - the 11/28/2015 at 4:49pm<b>krazayman</b> - the 09/12/2015 at 9:32pm<b>Jake42100</b> - the 09/12/2015 at 7:45pm<b>laxtax</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 7:54pm<b>thevelociraptor</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 11:02pm<b>bps315</b> - the 06/01/2015 at 1:10am<b>BabyFaceMcKay</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 11:58pm<b>jacky75</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 2:52pm<b>dark_thunder</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 12:30am<b>cheyyeee</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 9:11am

n3rdzgotskillz's FML badges

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of n3rdzgotskillz's badges

n3rdzgotskillz's favorite FMLs

Today, according to daycare, my son is behind in his potty training curriculum because we are not "celebrating his natural bodily functions" enough. He turned 2 a week ago, and he peed on our bed last night because we're trying to meet this demand. FML

#21481731
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22891) - you deserved it (2837)

On 10/19/2015 at 6:15am - kids - by NotThePotty - United States (California)

Today, I was skating in the city when I slipped and fractured my arm. As I was lying in pain, a guy walked up to me, frisked my pocket and took my wallet. He then said: "It's nothing personal." FML

#21281599
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39564) - you deserved it (3311)

On 10/20/2014 at 4:50am - misc - by ColdStones (man) - Norway (Hordaland)

Today, a nearby volcano erupted for the second time. We were all urged to keep our windows and doors closed in case of ash clouds. My father responded by opening every window and door and shouting, "Come at me, bro!" FML

#20171802
172 comments

Today, I went to visit my parents. Dad went on a religious tirade, and Mum got sick of him and pelted a Brazil nut at his head. Dad then lost his shit, and told Mum to go to her room and pray. I now remember why I moved out of home in the first place. FML

#5225291
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36850) - you deserved it (3357)

On 09/13/2009 at 8:42am - misc - by Sigh (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was trying to have sex with my boyfriend, David. I moaned his name and he whispered, "I'm not David." Then, with an Italian accent, he said, "It's-a-me! Mario!" FML

#4882481
348 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67429) - you deserved it (16984)

On 08/28/2009 at 1:11pm - intimacy - by Michelle (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, my nose was itchy. As I reached towards it to itch it, I sneezed ridiculously hard. I punched myself in the eye and now it's all purple and puffy. FML

#4623862
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44039) - you deserved it (9554)

On 08/18/2009 at 7:47am - health - by Ahhwtf (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, before I went to bed, I watched a terrifying movie with zombies. I woke up with a headache, a bloody nose, and my mom standing over me frantically asking me what was wrong. Apparently I had been "fighting the zombies off" in my sleep and had been punching myself in the face. FML

#4501918
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48486) - you deserved it (12839)

On 08/13/2009 at 2:17pm - misc - by fearofzombies (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I found out why my boyfriend gets so upset when I make jokes about him and his best guy friend being lovers. It's because they are. FML

#4426507
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68309) - you deserved it (8867)

On 08/10/2009 at 12:31pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for a while, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "Soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML

#836792
955 comments

I agree, your life sucks (384364) - you deserved it (44117)

On 04/06/2009 at 3:39pm - misc - by creepermagnet (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I got a text message. It said, "I'm so drunk. What you up to, girl?" It was my dad. FML

#27684
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (77408) - you deserved it (4169)

On 02/11/2009 at 9:09pm - misc - by sober (woman) - United States (Virginia)



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie delivers in 2016
  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: