This member hasn't filled in the description.
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I was given a lapdance by a pregnant stripper. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9858) - you deserved it (24108)
On 06/02/2012 at 11:16am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, my girlfriend stuck her finger up my butt while giving me a hand-job, promising it would feel really good. It just felt awkward and made me need to poop. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26538) - you deserved it (6407)
On 05/30/2012 at 5:46am - intimacy - by Brax (man) - United States
Today, I texted my friend and asked her what her sad status on Facebook was about. She texted me back saying her step-mother had passed away. I tried to reply with "awwh" but my phone autocorrected it to "ahaha." FML
I agree, your life sucks (24079) - you deserved it (4922)
On 05/27/2012 at 3:19am - misc - by iPhonekid - United States (Texas)
Today, my friends switched my mom and my girlfriend's numbers in my phone. I sexted my mom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25511) - you deserved it (6297)
On 05/26/2012 at 3:15am - intimacy - by ilovemymomma - United States (Texas)
Today, my friends switched my mom and my girlfriend's numbers in my phone. I sexted my mom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25511) - you deserved it (6297)
On 05/26/2012 at 3:15am - intimacy - by ilovemymomma - United States (Texas)
Today, I didn't even bother to turn my cellphone off in a movie theater because I knew no one would text me or call. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18047) - you deserved it (2907)
On 05/22/2012 at 7:02am - misc - by Rick - United States (South Carolina)
Today, my fiancé and I planned a romantic movie night. Champagne, popcorn, romantic comedy. Then his friend decided to show up and they've been talking about 1st generation Pokémon ever since. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19183) - you deserved it (4407)
On 05/21/2012 at 7:14pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I spilled boiling water on my legs. A coworker told me that putting mustard on the burn would heal it. I ended up at the emergency room. When people walked by I could hear them say "it smells like hot dogs". FML
I agree, your life sucks (14146) - you deserved it (5562)
On 05/20/2012 at 11:03am - health - by jcdc - United States (Texas)
Today, I was about to get in the shower, when I felt an odd itch in my navel. I saw what I thought was bellybutton lint, so I pulled on it, and quickly realized what I had between my fingers was a still-squirming, headless tick. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21535) - you deserved it (1648)
On 05/19/2012 at 6:54pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, I discovered that my acne glows yellow and orange under black lights while in front of a wall of them at a club. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16355) - you deserved it (1467)
On 05/16/2012 at 12:43am - health - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I found out my best friend was having a birthday party and I wasn't invited, so I asked her why. She replied, "what birthday party?" It was a surprise birthday party. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11674) - you deserved it (17913)
On 05/15/2012 at 10:13am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, I was having dinner with my college friends to celebrate the end of our first year. I said really great things about them as individuals. The only thing they had to say to me was, "Thanks for being the token black friend." FML
I agree, your life sucks (17351) - you deserved it (1953)
On 05/14/2012 at 10:23pm - misc - by foreverbrown (man) - United States
Today, a friend who I hadn't seen in a while offered to give me a ride. I didn't really know how to give directions to my house, so when we had been driving for a while and it was getting awkward, I just pointed at a random house and pretended to live there. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6541) - you deserved it (4821)
On 05/14/2012 at 10:22am - misc - by Anonymous - Estonia (Harjumaa)
Today, after 4 days of constipation, I finally pooped. Sadly, I was not on the toilet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20753) - you deserved it (1710)
On 05/13/2012 at 11:14pm - health - by Anonymous - United States
Today, it's my birthday. All I wanted was birthday sex, but all my boyfriend could talk about was how great the new purse he got me was. I think he might like it more than me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18155) - you deserved it (3410)
On 05/13/2012 at 8:25pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
