ms_uruz7

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ms_uruz7

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 24 July 1993 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3933
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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ms_uruz7's page activity

Visits<b>Si123</b> - the 08/16/2015 at 5:30am<b>AwkwardFlower</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 11:43pm<b>UndyingKarma</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 12:58pm<b>xwendifferx</b> - the 01/07/2015 at 11:21pm<b>Ins3rtEpicName</b> - the 06/13/2014 at 3:44pm<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/08/2014 at 3:53am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:46pm<b>JamesTheGiraffe</b> - the 01/22/2011 at 11:56pm<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 1:36am

Fucked!<b>_shaydwashere_</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 5:20am

ms_uruz7's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

ms_uruz7's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend of 6 months called me. He said his mom was making him choose between having a dog or having a girlfriend. I asked him which one he picked. He was quiet, I heard barking in the background. FML

by WoofWoof / 12/07/2009 at 1:20pm / United States (Michigan) / Love

Today, I learned explosive diarrhea is real. I felt it coming and dashed into our supermarket. 10 feet in, liquid poo started spewing down my pants legs. 150 feet to go. I ran. It ran. They watched. After 15 minutes of cleaning, I slunk out. Now, I have to find a new market, maybe a new town. FML

by Anonymous / 11/24/2009 at 6:44am / United States (Alabama) / Health

Today, I saw a grasshopper in the urinal so I decided to pee on it. It jumped out, scared the hell out of me, and I peed all over myself. FML

by TheMichaelNixon / 11/14/2009 at 4:37pm / United States (Tennessee) / Animals

Today, I was at a party where I ate a bowl of disgusting snacks because I didn't want to drink on an empty stomach. I spent the next twelve hours trying to prevent the world from collapsing into millions of demonic shards, cause apparently that's what a large dose of magic mushrooms does. FML

by swedishdude / 11/14/2009 at 8:37am / Sweden (Skane Lan) / Miscellaneous

Today, my 6 year old daughter asked me if the tooth fairy was real. I said yes, and she said she wanted to try to catch her. Later, she pulled out a tooth and put it under her pillow. I came in to take out the tooth and replace it with money. There were mouse traps behind her pillow. FML

by snapped / 11/12/2009 at 11:19pm / United States (Virginia) / Kids

Today, I found out that my friend uses pictures of me to motivate her to work out. They are accompanied by sayings such as "you don't want to turn out like this." FML

by Anonymous / 11/09/2009 at 12:47am / New Zealand (Auckland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had a police officer come to my house because I've been reported missing. My friends online decided to call the police because I haven't signed in for 6 days. FML

by iheartvodka / 11/07/2009 at 1:55am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, as I stopped at a traffic light, I noticed the man in the car next to me break out in laughter. I pulled over later on to see that someone had drawn a large penis on the side of my van. I then spent all my morning cleaning it off. I went outside later only to see someone had redrawn it. FML

by WasteOfTime / 11/01/2009 at 9:36am / United Kingdom (Manchester) / Transportation

Today, I was playing with my cat and holding her upside down. She started frantically meowing, but I still continued on playing with her. Seconds later, she got explosive diarrhea everywhere, including my hair, face, shirt, and mouth. FML

by Anonymous / 10/28/2009 at 2:40pm / United States (New Jersey) / Animals

Today, I carved a pumpkin for Halloween. I thought it would be cool to carve my name, and have it shine through onto the wall behind it. I figured that if I carved my name backwards then it would show up correct on the wall. My name's Lana and now my wall says Anal. FML

by Anonymous / 10/23/2009 at 1:22am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, my cat managed to lock my dad and me outside of our house. FML

by Anonymous / 10/21/2009 at 10:58pm / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I learned that being a twin really isn't that cool. After laughing at my twin brother for getting a speeding ticket he turns to me and says "It's not mine." Confused, I look at the ticket and see my name. He used my license. FML

by Twinner / 10/20/2009 at 3:03pm / Canada (Nova Scotia) / Transportation

Today, I had to pretend to give birth in a play. I wanted to make it a realistic as possible but ended up crapping myself on stage by accident. FML

by oxjessiiox / 10/11/2009 at 11:42am / United Kingdom (Leicestershire) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was on a plane with my grandma. A cute guy sat down next to her. She asked his age. He told her he was 16. She said, "Oh, that's how old my granddaughter here is." She then turned to me and said loudly, "You should switch seats with me, he's HOT!" Well, at least Grandma loves me. FML

by Anonymous / 10/05/2009 at 4:10pm / United States (Indiana) / Transportation

Today, I made a tuna sandwich. It was really nice , so I looked at the label to see what brand it was. Turns out it wasn't tuna. It was fancy cat food. FML

by Rizzle / 10/04/2009 at 3:50am / New Zealand (Wellington) / Animals