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mps1969's favorite FMLs
Today, a car was tailgating and honking at me while trying to pass me, so I decided to be a bitch back and go extremely slow. We got to a two lane road and the car passed me up. The man in the front seat flipped me off while pointing to his wife in the back seat who was clearly in labor. FML
by lois2lane / 12/23/2009 at 2:15am / United States (Texas) / Transportation
Today, I found out my neighbor ordered parking tickets for everyone on the block. My car was 4 inches into his driveway, but not obstructing his exit in any way. That didn't stop him from calling in, on a Sunday, at 8 AM, an 88 dollar ticket. He also left a note "Your parking sucks, love, Greg." FML
by notgreg / 11/10/2009 at 10:59am / United States (California) / Money
Today, I was at the mall, I saw a girl crying that her ice cream had fallen on the floor. Feeling generous, I bought her a new one. She threw it on the ground, laughed, and came over to her mom and told that I was bothering her, so the mom called security. FML
by miseventshappen / 11/09/2009 at 12:49am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I got a letter in the mail saying I'm being sued by the guy that broke into my house last week. When I walked in and saw him, I tackled him, punched him in the face a time or two, and restrained him with zip ties. I now have to pay for his broken nose and face charges of assault. FML
by ShouldHaveLetHimTakeTheTV / 11/07/2009 at 12:01pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous
Today, while trying on a dress, my sister came up behind me and poked my back, asking, “What have you stuck down your dress?” I hadn’t put anything down the back of my dress; it was just my back fat. FML
by Anonymous / 10/23/2009 at 12:56am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous
by freshman15 / 10/22/2009 at 2:47pm / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous
Today, while sitting with my son, an ice cream cone landed on my head from out of no where. I look up to see three children on the balcony above us yelling, "Look we hit the fat lady!" They ran away laughing. FML
by mvgirl / 10/22/2009 at 11:47am / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous
by zappy / 10/11/2009 at 12:40am / United States (New York) / Health
- 1Today, I was fired for being late to work, even though the only reason I was late was because I had… 2Today, I've stopped smoking, lost 30 pounds, taken several painful tests, and checked my ovulation… 3Today, I saw an elderly lady fall over in the street. Nobody bothered to do anything, so I went…