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motherpuncher

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motherpuncher

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 23 September 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 929
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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motherpuncher's page activity

Visits<b>stevenJB</b> - the 02/13/2013 at 9:29am<b>bspiper87</b> - the 01/28/2013 at 5:37am

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motherpuncher's favorite FMLs

Today, my proposal to my girlfriend was supposed to be exactly when the ball dropped at midnight. Unfortunately my mother called her at 11:55pm to ask her if she liked the ring. FML

#21328278
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40421) - you deserved it (3199)

On 01/01/2015 at 12:47am - love - by Proposal Fail - United States (New York)

Today, I'm celebrating New Years with my cat. I made her a cake. FML

#21328260
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27429) - you deserved it (5883)

On 01/01/2015 at 12:25am - misc - by HappyNewYearsToMeAndMyCat (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I went to a club to celebrate New Year's Eve. A cute guy came up to me at the bar and asked my name. I thought my 8 year long dry spell was finally about to end. I smiled and said "Chrissy!" He said "That's a whore's name!" and wandered back off into the crowd. FML

#21327860
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31469) - you deserved it (2975)

On 12/31/2014 at 2:39pm - love - by cakestar9 (woman) - Ireland (Clare)

Today, my elderly neighbour told me why my other neighbours don't talk to me. I'm a massage/physical therapist and treat clients, mostly athletes, in my home. My neighbours saw the steady stream of young, buff guys coming to my house and concluded that I'm a gay prostitute. FML

#21327463
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33136) - you deserved it (2637)

On 12/30/2014 at 10:34pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I met my new roommate. I hadn't even gotten her name yet, because the first thing she said to me instead was that she wanted to hang her confederate flag on the wall. I'm black. FML

#21326235
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35477) - you deserved it (4279)

On 12/29/2014 at 12:00am - misc - by okay17 - United States

Today, I got a gift-wrapped package in the mail from my racist mother-in-law. She's always hated me, so I thought it was a bit strange. Inside was a squirt gun and a note telling me to take my "black ass" for a walk around a police station with it, followed with a smiley face. FML

#21325871
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39529) - you deserved it (2771)

On 12/28/2014 at 1:41pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my mom finally got a Netflix account after months of me begging. When I asked her what the login was, she refused to give it to me. She said, "Netflix will know it's not me and then they'll cancel our account." FML

Today, I was rushed to the emergency room in crippling pain, thanks to a very dangerous cluster of cysts on my ovaries that could rupture at any time. My boyfriend took this news as my way of denying him sex and broke up with me for "going to obscene lengths" to emasculate him. FML

#21325566
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33730) - you deserved it (2616)

On 12/27/2014 at 10:50pm - love - by Twysted91 (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found a hornet's nest in the backyard, so I called my brother over to take a look. He said "Hmm, wonder how fast you can run." then hurled a rock at the nest and sprinted back to the house. I wasn't so fast. I now feel like someone's beaten me half to death with a cactus. FML

#21323182
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32784) - you deserved it (3387)

On 12/24/2014 at 9:43am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was yelled at in public for staring at a guy in a wheelchair. I was staring 'cause he was so good looking. FML

#21322556
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34109) - you deserved it (4260)

On 12/23/2014 at 6:28am - misc - by anonymous - Austria (Wien)

Today, I asked my grandpa why he spoils me so much. He told me it's because he truly believes no one else will ever want to. FML

#21322081
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31194) - you deserved it (2735)

On 12/22/2014 at 1:40pm - misc - by bxjxj - United States

Today, half of my motivation to stop drinking is so that my tolerance will go down, because I currently can't actually afford enough alcohol to get even tipsy anymore. FML

#21319263
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26009) - you deserved it (10888)

On 12/17/2014 at 5:41pm - health - by Recovering Alcoholic - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)

Today, my boss heard a rumor that I was in a relationship with a fellow co-worker. He assured me that inside relationships weren't against any store policy, so I confirmed it. He then fired my boyfriend anyway. FML

#21318814
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30716) - you deserved it (4836)

On 12/16/2014 at 10:31pm - work - by thankssomuch - United States (Maine)

Today, my classmate commented on how quiet I am. I responded with, "Well, nobody plots murder out loud," trying to be funny. My teacher tried to get me arrested. FML

#21318752
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35064) - you deserved it (6735)

On 12/16/2014 at 8:54pm - work - by justjoking - United States

Today, my new friend tried to introduce me to "American Culture," as I am new to the city. He explained what a hamburger is and how it differs from the Asian food I was used to eating. I moved from Seattle and have worked at Burger King. FML

#21317624
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32693) - you deserved it (2465)

On 12/14/2014 at 10:30pm - misc - by AsianSensation (man) - Canada (Ontario)



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