About mominzed : If you deserve it, you deserve it!
Judgmental
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
Today, my girlfriend, who is very self conscious about her body, finally decided to have sex with me. She told me to wait a few minutes, so I did. I stripped and turned around to find her in a one-piece swimsuit, with a hole cut out of the crotch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (62923) - you deserved it (5691)
On 07/13/2011 at 1:02am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, I was invited over to a dinner with the CEOs of my company, along with my two children. My 3 year-old asked loudly why we have two "nose holes", to which my 4 year-old son replied "So you can pick your nose and still breathe!" He then demonstrated. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24694) - you deserved it (4861)
On 07/13/2011 at 12:43am - kids - by ohno - United States (Colorado)
Today, I woke up to my pants off and my vibrator still on. I fell asleep masturbating. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16525) - you deserved it (39248)
On 07/12/2011 at 1:25pm - intimacy - by 44haley44 - United States
Today, I was hanging out with a guy that I really like. When he gave me a hug goodbye, he slid his hand into the back pocket of my jeans. It was glorious until I farted on his hand. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32416) - you deserved it (16291)
On 07/12/2011 at 1:09pm - misc - by couldntholdit (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was walking down the street to go to the movies, when I got punched in the back of the head. When I turned around, a stranger said, "HAHA! It's punch a random person day!" When I asked him why he chose me, he replied "You're ugly." FML
I agree, your life sucks (31333) - you deserved it (3497)
On 07/12/2011 at 12:46pm - misc - by ManInPain (man) - United States
Today, I took my mom to Victoria's Secret to help her find a bra. She made me try one on to see if it looked good on me. Turns out we have the same cup size. I'm a guy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17148) - you deserved it (43058)
On 07/12/2011 at 12:45pm - misc - by sm702 - United States (Colorado)
Today, my father spent half an hour trying to convert my cat to Christianity. He has already done this with my other two cats. He's completely serious and thinks they are born-again Christians. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25659) - you deserved it (2114)
On 07/11/2011 at 10:15pm - animals - by CatOwner (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, my girlfriend and I were making out while she was laying on me. Her little brother walked in, saw us and yelled, "Mom they're swallowing each other!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (21161) - you deserved it (17387)
On 07/11/2011 at 5:08pm - intimacy - by tony456 (man) - United States (Vermont)
Today, I moved into my new house. I went over to my neighbors' house to introduce myself. As they opened the door I saw a telescope pointed at my house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27755) - you deserved it (1856)
On 07/11/2011 at 2:16pm - misc - by BMike - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I had diarrhea at work. While trying to be subtle about the noises, the woman in the stall next to me called me by name and asked if I was having trouble. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25633) - you deserved it (1948)
On 07/11/2011 at 1:42pm - work - by Username - United States
Today, I took my 16 year-old daughter to get a bank account, taking her birth certificate with us as requested. When the teller wrote her name down on a piece of paper, my daughter said "How do you know my name?" The teller just looked at her and held up her birth certificate. I raised a nitwit. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23958) - you deserved it (8595)
On 07/11/2011 at 5:25am - kids - by Mothering (woman) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I got home from work to find my house covered in graffiti dicks, the windows smashed, the front lawn entirely ripped up, and my letter box containing dog shit. I also found a note taped to the door saying, "Suck on this Darren". Darren is my next door neighbor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (51342) - you deserved it (2560)
On 07/11/2011 at 3:42am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I was standing at airport security. One of the bag inspectors asked me to remove my travel pouch, pointing to the lump under my shirt. I didn't know how to tell him that it was just one of my fat rolls. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24585) - you deserved it (9585)
On 07/10/2011 at 10:34pm - health - by muffintop (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I realized that my wife is such a bitch normally, she's actually nicer when she is on her period. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28673) - you deserved it (6736)
On 07/09/2011 at 12:32am - misc - by Username - United States
Today, I peeked through my window and trained a pair of binoculars on my neighbour's house. Every night without fail, he ends up standing in front of his window topless to flex his muscles. This time, I was surprised to instead find a note taped to the window saying, "Sorry, I'm out tonight." FML
I agree, your life sucks (8431) - you deserved it (57396) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 07/08/2011 at 8:11pm - love - by Anonyme - Sent from mobile version
Sunday 12 May 2013
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