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mk58

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mk58

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 28 June 1986 (28 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 4927
  • Number of comments : 862
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About mk58 : First off, I AM A WOMAN, GODAMMIT. Just because I happen to like rage comics, and may often be seen wearing my rage face does not make me a male.

I'm a bit vulgar and rude sometimes, so I apologize beforehand if I hurt anyone's feelings.

I am a bit of a grammar nazi. I won't go around pointing out little errors or things that I know are probably typos (or autocorrect), but I will rage at you if you call someone out for being an idiot like so:
"your an idiot"
Or if you type like this:
"OMG dis be da sh1t!"

If you don't see what is wrong with those phrases right away, I'm not going to tell you what isn't correct. You'll find out when I rage at you. Just a word of caution, that's all.

I don't comment as much as I used to, but I'm still around lurking.

Feel free to message me, unless you happen to be a rude son/daughter of a goober.

*puts rage face on*
Now SCAT before I eat you!

mk58's page activity

Visits<b>Garrett2818</b> - yesterday at 3:06pm<b>senor_octubre</b> - yesterday at 3:36am<b>monomomo</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 5:31pm<b>meggie918</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 7:36am<b>bjf21</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 2:20pm<b>chudun</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 11:32am<b>danniKay214</b> - the 08/06/2014 at 4:32pm<b>Mornai</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 10:17pm<b>depressed_child</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 10:51pm<b>GothicKnife</b> - the 06/15/2014 at 2:33pm<b>poulkrebs</b> - the 06/13/2014 at 7:06am<b>ericcrash</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 6:43pm<b>JoshuaOdom</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 1:05am<b>pikawarriors</b> - the 06/08/2014 at 12:57am<b>howsthisforaname</b> - the 06/01/2014 at 8:07am<b>jubejube239</b> - the 05/16/2014 at 10:25am<b>badminton</b> - the 05/13/2014 at 10:49pm<b>twitchybug</b> - the 05/01/2014 at 11:05pm

mk58's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

I never take things to heart

Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

See all of mk58's badges

mk58's favorite FMLs

Today, someone put dog turds underneath all the decorative reindeers' butts in my front yard. The chief suspect is my curmudgeonly, holidays-hating fuckball of a neighbor. Last week he repositioned them in very suggestive poses. FML

#18565100
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21460) - you deserved it (5337)

On 12/20/2011 at 9:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, after explaining to my two year old that we were going bra shopping, he decided to announce to the entire bank that we were going to buy Mommy some boobies. FML

#18561778
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16958) - you deserved it (23053)

On 12/20/2011 at 1:59pm - kids - by imamomma - United States

Today, I had to sit and listen to my co-worker moan about how early he has to get up tomorrow to go on his ski holiday in France over Christmas. He also complained about how tiring skiing is. FML

#18560117
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28434) - you deserved it (2020)

On 12/20/2011 at 6:54am - work - by dogwheels - United Kingdom (Newcastle upon Tyne)

Today, I dropped my 7-year-old son off at school. He decided to have fun and step out of my car screaming "Stranger danger" while running away and pointing at me. I then had to get out of my car to shut the door he'd left wide open. This caused 20 other kids to scream "Stranger danger" as well. FML

Today, after rocking my one-year old daughter for nearly two hours, she finally fell asleep. As I went to leave her room, I stubbed my toe. I now have a broken toe, a screaming child, and a wife who will be so proud that her daughter's first word is "FUCK!" FML

#18531059
175 comments

Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. Afterwards, he laid on the bed, silent and naked in the fetal position, I had to sit there stroking his head for an hour. I think I raped my boyfriend. FML

#18483356
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48513) - you deserved it (7724)

On 12/11/2011 at 6:54am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, while my boyfriend was sneaking out before my parents woke, he slipped on some ice and fell on their car. The alarm went off. FML

#18482470
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14643) - you deserved it (24971)

On 12/11/2011 at 2:29am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was set up on a blind date. When I arrived, the person waiting for me was a woman. It appears that my friends have always thought I was a lesbian, and that they 'played along' when I talked about guys. FML

#18466440
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31436) - you deserved it (2768)

On 12/09/2011 at 2:56am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I drank a fifth of vodka before I took my political science final. My professor later called me to tell me that I had written "Obama is a beautiful chocolate man" to every essay question. FML

#18465913
0 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10994) - you deserved it (87356)

On 12/09/2011 at 1:11am - misc - by blondie101 - United States

Today, I helped myself to a small glass of cocktail from the fridge, not realising it was alcoholic. I told my mom what happened. She made me drink salty water until I vomited so I wouldn't get "alcohol poisoning". I'm 19. FML

#18417411
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29343) - you deserved it (7335)

On 12/03/2011 at 5:05am - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, in geometry class, we were working in dead silence. Apparently my phone wasn't on vibrate, and I received 25 texts all at once, while it blasted "Hakuna Matataaaa" out of my back pocket. They weren't even texts from friends, just Facebook notifications. FML

#18417096
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9900) - you deserved it (31171)

On 12/03/2011 at 3:15am - misc - by Makala - Egypt (Al Qahirah)

Today, I found out that the gentle, adorable oral surgeon who took out my wisdom teeth last year was recently arrested for rape. FML

#18416702
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30073) - you deserved it (2412)

On 12/03/2011 at 1:43am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, at a nightclub, a cute girl started hitting on me. I got into it and we danced. Just as she started getting frisky with me, a guy shoved me off, smacked me to the floor with a right-hook, and shouted, "That's what you get for touching my woman." FML

#18414654
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27241) - you deserved it (4187)

On 12/02/2011 at 9:02pm - health - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, my husband and I went to my overbearing mom's 57th birthday party. He opened his gift in front of her and said smugly, "The makeup's for your face, and the prayer book's for the fat rolls." Any hope of family peace is now lost. FML

#18414489
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21539) - you deserved it (3177)

On 12/02/2011 at 8:35pm - love - by bad blood, no shit (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my fiancé insists that instead of kissing at the crucial moment of our wedding ceremony, we should give each other a high five. FML

#18392410
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39205) - you deserved it (5519)

On 11/30/2011 at 6:17am - love - by no low five (woman) - United States



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