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Offline (the 08/03/2015 at 6:48pm) | Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 28 March 1993 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 8219
  • Number of comments : 862
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About mk58 : First off, I AM A WOMAN, GODAMMIT. Just because I happen to like rage comics, and may often be seen wearing my rage face does not make me a male.

I'm a bit vulgar and rude sometimes, so I apologize beforehand if I hurt anyone's feelings.

I am a bit of a grammar nazi. I won't go around pointing out little errors or things that I know are probably typos (or autocorrect), but I will rage at you if you call someone out for being an idiot like so:
"your an idiot"
Or if you type like this:
"OMG dis be da sh1t!"

If you don't see what is wrong with those phrases right away, I'm not going to tell you what isn't correct. You'll find out when I rage at you. Just a word of caution, that's all.

I don't comment as much as I used to, but I'm still around lurking.

Feel free to message me, unless you happen to be a rude son/daughter of a goober.

*puts rage face on*
Now SCAT before I eat you!

mk58's page activity

Visits<b>UserOfTheMind</b> - the 11/19/2015 at 12:02am<b>couchcat</b> - the 11/13/2015 at 8:06pm<b>hamburgerjung</b> - the 11/05/2015 at 12:53pm<b>jayemerald17</b> - the 10/06/2015 at 1:43am<b>TheGreatPotato</b> - the 09/30/2015 at 4:27pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 09/28/2015 at 8:18am<b>Cookie_Overlord</b> - the 09/28/2015 at 4:06am<b>Vintage_Cola</b> - the 09/19/2015 at 11:32am<b>UndeadCity9</b> - the 09/09/2015 at 7:12pm<b>Emmalyne606777</b> - the 08/31/2015 at 4:43am<b>guss5441</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 1:01am<b>Michaelaarnett</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 12:04am<b>CitricAcid</b> - the 08/12/2015 at 6:39pm<b>kunjac0945</b> - the 08/11/2015 at 5:21pm<b>jdmx325</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 5:00am<b>teentee401</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 4:55pm<b>FusionPlacebo</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 7:48pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 12:39pm

Fucked!<b>guss5441</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 7:01am<b>CitricAcid</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 12:39am<b>FusionPlacebo</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 1:48am<b>hersheykisses511</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 7:10am<b>winterforever97</b> - the 06/27/2015 at 8:31pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 4:14pm

mk58's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

I never take things to heart

Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.

See all of mk58's badges

mk58's favorite FMLs

Today, I went into an exam room to do a check-up on one of my patients. I told the little girl's mother that she needed her flu shots. When the girl heard this, she took an apple out of her pocket and threw it at me. FML


I agree, your life sucks (34907) - you deserved it (4104)

On 09/28/2014 at 3:26pm - health - by jazzie7719 - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I attended a family gathering. My cousin's new baby was being passed around. By way of politely declining to hold it, I meant to say that I looked forward to getting to know it better once it could talk. What I blurted out instead was, "I can't wait until it resembles a human being." FML

Today, in the middle of a Spanish oral exam, I start to panic. My teacher suggests I say whatever pops into my head. I blurt out, "Heeey Macarena!" FML


I agree, your life sucks (42550) - you deserved it (8601) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/14/2014 at 12:33am - work - by LeChameauTrisomique - France (Centre)

Today, I discovered that when one of my toddlers throws up, the other sympathy-pukes too, and that this continues until they're both empty. I guess my car is going to stink of vomit for a while. FML


I agree, your life sucks (43431) - you deserved it (3524)

On 02/11/2014 at 2:10pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I received a poorly-written letter from my asshole neighbor in which he threatened to "sew" me because my dog shat on his lawn again. I went over, asked if he needed some wool for his sewing, and told him to stop being an idiot. Now he's apparently hiring a lawyer for real. FML


I agree, your life sucks (41527) - you deserved it (23116)

On 12/05/2013 at 5:26pm - misc - by possibly a sweater (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was at the doctor's getting a check up. He asked me if I was allergic to anything, to which I blurted out, "Cats." He gave me a weird look and said, "Don't worry, I won't give you cats." FML


I agree, your life sucks (42501) - you deserved it (6879)

On 09/03/2013 at 4:17am - health - by NoNotCats =^._.^= (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I went downstairs a little after midnight to grab a snack, and in the dark hallway, I clearly saw a small child walk into the kitchen. I was freaked out, but I followed him in. There was nobody in the room. I'm now too scared to sleep, and am seriously considering moving house. FML


I agree, your life sucks (58306) - you deserved it (4925)

On 08/17/2013 at 12:27pm - misc - by fsfs (man) - Germany (Schleswig-Holstein)

Today, I was going through my daughter's contacts, except all of them had names from Harry Potter. I found the name "Mom." I was relieved I didn't have some silly name, until I realized it wasn't my number; it was her father's new wife. My number was under "Voldemort." FML


I agree, your life sucks (51236) - you deserved it (21774)

On 06/15/2013 at 12:19am - kids - by Jill (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had to explain to my girlfriend that taking triple the maximum dosage of painkillers won't actually triple its effects. She rolled her eyes, called me clueless, and said that I should "leave this stuff to the professionals." She's studying to become a doctor. FML


I agree, your life sucks (44023) - you deserved it (6136)

On 04/21/2013 at 1:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Kuwait (Al Kuwayt)

Today, I was making lunch, when my two-year-old ran up to me and handed me an empty bottle of baby powder. I soon realized I'd be spending the rest of my day cleaning the entire house. FML

Today, I went to see my new dentist. He was really cute, so after the checkup I started flirting. He stopped me right after I asked him out, saying, "Being a dentist has its advantages, I can see the girl's mouth before I stick my tongue in it. And in your case, it's a big no." FML


I agree, your life sucks (22490) - you deserved it (43734)

On 01/21/2013 at 1:32am - love - by black and yellow - United States (California)

Today, marks the sixth day in a row that my mum has called me to discuss my upcoming wedding. She's obsessed and has intimidated the actual planner I hired into going along with her plans. She's slipped up twice already and accidentally referred to it as her own wedding. Just great. FML


I agree, your life sucks (38378) - you deserved it (3925)

On 01/11/2013 at 5:19pm - love - by fuck you, mum (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my mom has officially lost 100 pounds due to a lap-band surgery. After sharing her excitement, she also shared her troubles. She said, "Everything hangs now, even my cooter. Can they fix that?" Thank you for the mental image, mom. FML


I agree, your life sucks (21408) - you deserved it (1750)

On 11/12/2012 at 12:25am - health - by KtSue - United States

Today, I mistook my dog's head for the gear shift while tearing down the highway. FML


I agree, your life sucks (8434) - you deserved it (25660)

On 06/22/2012 at 3:41pm - misc - by hakura madada - Japan (Tokyo)

Today, my grandmother threatened to kill herself with a banana. She then got angry with me when I didn't attempt to get the banana away from her. My mom punished me because I didn't take the situation seriously enough. FML


I agree, your life sucks (32254) - you deserved it (3203)

On 06/18/2012 at 7:38am - misc - by DwarfFrog - United States

C comme Line's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Best of the Worst #20
  • Here we are in November! Winter is here, for most of us, it's dark, grey and depressing and if you're the kind of person who watches network news 24/7, you're probably going to need some cheering up.…

Monday 30 November 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

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