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mjoyn98

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mjoyn98
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 448
  • Number of comments : 55
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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mjoyn98's favorite FMLs

Today, I asked the girl I'm madly in love with out to dinner. When she asked me if I would pay, I jokingly said, "Well, that depends on how the date goes." She looked me up and down and said, "No thanks then." FML

#19549742
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17628) - you deserved it (12487)

On 04/29/2012 at 7:56pm - love - by -insert clever nickname here- - United States (Washington)

Today, it was snowing, and the campus looked just lovely. I sat on a nearby window ledge to enjoy the view. I was joined by a girl who looked fascinated as well, so I decided to make small talk. She nodded, smiled wistfully, and said, "There's herpes in the air today." FML

#19525973
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17619) - you deserved it (1852)

On 04/25/2012 at 2:22am - intimacy - by intheairtonight (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I went grocery shopping. As I was leaning in to pick up some produce, someone viciously slapped me on the butt. I whirled around and nobody was anywhere in sight. Now I'm starting to worry that I'm losing my mind. FML

#19517929
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20646) - you deserved it (2280)

On 04/23/2012 at 6:41pm - misc - by beleria (woman) - United States

Today, I came down with food poisoning of some sort. After hours of scrambling to the toilet to vomit and empty my bowels, my three-year-old daughter got fed up and is now trying to potty-train me. FML

#19511225
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18070) - you deserved it (1995)

On 04/22/2012 at 1:12pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my ex-husband officially became my step dad. FML

#19421919
386 comments

I agree, your life sucks (82675) - you deserved it (4004)

On 04/07/2012 at 4:20am - love - by ladylarni - Australia

Today, I posted on Facebook saying I'm in a new relationship. One of my buddies said, "You're cheating on Jill?" My girlfriend saw this and went completely nuts, not giving me a chance to explain that "Jill" is just a euphemism for your hand. FML

#19401228
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20797) - you deserved it (3881)

On 04/03/2012 at 2:10pm - love - by jackmehoffa (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I called my girlfriend saying "I think we need to break up." She said "No, I don't think so," and hung up. FML

#19387601
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15718) - you deserved it (28891)

On 04/01/2012 at 10:03am - love - by Jeff make - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I had a job interview. I have major OCD, and I had to sit in a room with a man covered in cat hair, struggling to even survive for an hour and a half. FML

#19368838
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16469) - you deserved it (3275)

On 03/29/2012 at 7:13am - misc - by toryzhere - Canada

Today, I was babysitting this 12 year old. We were watching a movie, and he was being an angel just laying with his head in my lap. He fell asleep so I closed my eyes and had a little nap. When I woke up he had taken my shirt off and was feeling up my boobs. FML

#19343662
370 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36636) - you deserved it (11379)

On 03/25/2012 at 8:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I kicked my dog's toy snake out of my way. Then I realised my dog doesn't have a toy snake. FML

#19342755
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25306) - you deserved it (2774)

On 03/25/2012 at 1:49am - animals - by uh-oh - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I witnessed my husband swat a coffee bean over and over again, all the while mistaking it for a fly. I then figured he probably has a lower IQ than I do, which wouldn't be so bad if mine wasn't a few points away from minor retardation. FML

#19340403
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16057) - you deserved it (4816)

On 03/24/2012 at 7:06pm - misc - by sheilob (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I started my research project on horror stories and people's fascination with them. I did some research and wound up reading H.P. Lovecraft. On the upside, I can now pee more easily. On the downside, it's likely to be in my pants. FML

#19340135
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13225) - you deserved it (3484)

On 03/24/2012 at 6:05pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, while driving home from school, I noticed one of our hot quarterbacks in the car behind me. Trying to impress him, I pulled into the driveway of an expensive-looking house. To my horror, he pulled in behind me and asked what I was doing at his house. FML

#19320311
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9556) - you deserved it (59526)

On 03/21/2012 at 1:12pm - kids - by brooke (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my girlfriend called and said she had great news. Turns out I've cured her of that illness she gets every month. FML

#19276120
248 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27414) - you deserved it (17380)

On 03/14/2012 at 3:51am - misc - by daddy-o - United States (Utah)

Today, I got my yearbook. My sister and I are identical twins, and we realized only my sister had a picture in it. When we asked the head of yearbook, they said they thought it was the same girl trying to get two pictures, so they put in the prettier one. FML

#19269452
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31317) - you deserved it (1451)

On 03/13/2012 at 2:12am - misc - by Rynne S. - United States (Colorado)



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